People say I am the best boss. They go 'God, we've never worked in a place like this before, you're hilarious.' ... *lifts mug* I think that pretty much sums it up.
Downsizing? I have no problem with that. I've been recommending downsizing since I first got here. I even brought it up in my interview. I say? Bring it on.
My job is to speak to clients, um, on the phone, about…uh, quantities, and, uh…type of copier paper. ... And, um…I'm, I'm boring myself just talking about this.
I don't think it would be the worst thing if they let me go. ... I just, I don't think it's many little girls' dream to be a receptionist. Um, I like to do illustrations ...
What am I gonna DO with the award? …Nothing. I…I don't know what I'm gonna do. That's the least of my concerns right now.
It's all about my bonus.
I'm excited about today. I love girl talk.
I do play games. I sing. And I dangle things in front of my cats. I play lots of games. Just not at work.
The Dundies are kind of like a kid's birthday party…and you go…and there's really nothing for you to do…but the kid's having a really good time, so you, you're kind of there.
Michael's movie? Two thumbs DOWN.
The deal is this is my last hurrah, cause I made a New Year's resolution that I'm not gonna drink anymore. During the week.
Yep. That's exactly what happened.
I never really thought about death until Princess Diana died. That was the saddest funeral ever. That, and my sister's.
Technically I am in human resources, and Dwight was asking about human anatomy, um…I'm just sad the public school system failed him so badly.
I taught Mike some uh, some phrases, to help with his interracial conversations. ... Stuff like fleece it out, goin' mach five, dinkin' flicka. You know, things us negroes say.
Look, I know it's your job, I know you have to ask, but I promise you. I'm not gonna discuss it with him, I'm certainly not gonna discuss it with you. Do you have a light.
After Pam dumped me, I um…I kinda stopped taking care of myself for a while there. ... Now ... you know, I'm not gonna take her for granted. ...I gotta win her back.
Big Tuna is a super ambitious guy. ... But, I mean, I'm not threatened by him. I went to Cornell, you ever heard of it? I graduated in four years, I never studied once...
Jim's nice enough. I don't, I don't know how well he's fitting in here. He's always looking at the camera like this. What is that?
Yeah, it was a good day. I mean, first days are always the hardest, right? Well I should go. I gotta buckle him in.
I thought it was for real…so I was excited, but it was just, it was part of the game.
No. I did not know that Michael was dating Holly.
The beginning here has been a little bit of a fiasco. Either they don't respect me, or they respect me too much. And some of them still think that I'm the IT guy.
I will get offered the job. That's a call I've received many times. The slight hopefulness in their voice, the pregnant pause while they wait to hear my response. And then…
This job? Oh yeah, I'll get it. Jo's an old friend. I think I'm her best friend. She's not my best friend.
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