Television Quiz / Friends Quotes: Who said this?

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Can you name the Friends character who said each quote?

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Ok, you have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance!
'I'm late Green Eggs and Eggs discussion group. Tonight is why he would not eat them on a train.
You-you-you-you (trying to remain in control) threw my sandwich away MY SANDWICH?!!! MY SANDWICH!!!!!!
Fine! Judge all you want to but, married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, livin’ in a box!!
'If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y’kn
I grew up in a house with Monica, okay. If you didn't eat fast, you didn't eat.
You can't have Thanksgiving without turkey. That's like Fourth of July without apple pie, or Friday with no two pizzas.
If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
I can handle this. 'Handle' is my middle name. Actually, 'handle' is the middle of my first name.
There was a crooked man, who had a crooked smile, who lived in a shoe, for a... while...
You can't fire me. I make your decisions and I say, 'I'm not fired.' Ha.
I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Oh my God. I've become my father. I've been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn't see this coming.
I can't say hump or screw in front of the b-a-b-y... I just spelled the wrong words didn't I?
First divorce: wife's hidden sexuality, not my fault. Second divorce: said the wrong name at the altar, kind of my fault. Third divorce: they shouldn't let you get married when you
Ah, salmon skin roll.
Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you think that was wrong?
Yes My New name is Princess Consuela Banana Hammock.
They build you up like..'yeah, you look 19' and then they just take it away like..'no you don't'
Isn't that just kick you in the crotch spit on your neck fantastic?
I'm dating a guy whose pool I once peed in.
Wait a minute let, let me get this straight- you are saying that I have become so winey that I annoy you? Janice.
There my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my father, I got great boots' boots!
Now you stand out there and think about what you did! And when you come back in, I hope you'll remember that, the chick is NOT a toy!
Oh the cow in the meadow goes 'moo.' Oh the cow in the meadow goes 'moo.' Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up and that's how we get hamburger. Nooowww chickens!
Ross, this is not a marriage. It's the world's worst hang over.
Dinner for 6 for one. You boys are about to see someting REALLY special.
Hey, just so you know: it's *not* that common, it *doesn't* 'happen to every guy, ' and it *is* a big deal!
Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!
What? You made a bet. A bet is a bet. You bet on a bet, and if you lose you lose the bet.
All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If I don't input those numbers... it doesn't make much of a difference.
Hey, if we were in prison, you guys would be like my bitches
Well, if I were a guy...Wait, did I just say 'If I were a guy'?
Eww, Lambchop. How old is that sock? If I had a sock in my hand for thirty years it'd be talking too.
This has been like my dream ever since I got my first Easy-Bake Oven and opened 'Easy Monica's Bakery'
Hey, hey, it's fine, it's totally fine. We've got plenty of margaritas, it's all good.
Hey, you know, I have had it with you guys and your 'cancer' and your 'emphysema' and your 'heart disease.' The bottom line is smoking is cool and you know it.

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