Simpsons Quotes

Can you guess which character said this?

Classic Type in answers that appear in a list
Forced Order Answers have to be entered in order
They say the greatest tragedy is when a father outlives his son. I have never fully understood why. Frankly, I can see an upside to it!
I can't do it. A balloon saved one of my arteries. It wouldn't seem right to shoot one of his cousins.
I think he's a good man. I like him. I got nothing against him, but I'm definitely gonna make orphans of his children.
You strays are going straight to the pound where you'll be put to sleep... by my boring stories. And then you'll be killed!
Since we have fifteen minutes until recess please put down your pencils and stare at the front of the room.
Give me a bottle of bourbon! I've got a new liver, and I'm breaking it in.
Today, part four of our series of the agonizing pain in which I live every day.
Slow down. The sidewalk's for regular walkin', not for fancy walkin'.
More testicles means more iron.
I have soy milk. The doctor says the real kind could kill me.
You can't seriously want to ban alcohol. It tastes great, makes women appear more attractive, and makes a person virtually invulnerable to criticism.
Applause is an addiction, like heroin or checking your e-mail.
Cheer up, Homey. You don't need friends to be happy. I haven't had a friend in years.
This brown spot needs a little H2-oh, yeah!
He was more than a friend. He was the reason I got up in the morning because he would inject me with coffee at six in the morning in the back of the head.
Yaarr...these pornographic magazines will stop my men from resortin' to homosexuality...for about 10 minutes!
When a guy who loves america cries, it makes him super straight.
Do him two favors and then remind him that he owes us a favor.
At my age, I don't have much saliva left, so you'll have to lick my thumb before I can turn the page.
I must have, like, fallen on a bullet.
I like to come up here and make fun of the sunset. Hey gas ball! You suck!
Five finger discount, man.
To me, 'nerd' stands for Not Even Remotely Dorky. So thank you. Thank you for the compliment.
It's filth! It graphically portrays parts of the human body, which, practical as they may be, are evil!
Don't kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about!
I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff.
When I grow up, I want to be a principal, or a caterpillar!
Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.
What's the matter, sir? Never have I seen you look so unhappy while purchasing such a large quantity of ice cream.
Ah, they stole the balloon! I've been living in there!
Hey Salvatore! Get the ugly kid a platter of the red crap-a!
But, Homer, you can't let a single bad experience scare you away from drugs.
When you were in that coma, did you feel your brain getting damaged?
Ooh! Pick me, Teacher! I'm ever so smart!
Don't worry children. Most of you will never fall in love, but will marry out of fear of dying alone.
My beer! You never had a chance to become my urine!
Daddy says dice are wicked!
But this comes out of my salary! If I had a girlfriend, she'd kill me.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: democracy simply doesn't work.
I Didn't Do It. Nobody Saw Me Do It. You Can't Prove Anything.
No Homer, God didn't burn your house down, but he was working in the hearts of your friends be they Christian, Jew, or ... miscellaneous.
I stand on my record. Fifteen crashes and not a single fatality.
Now for my favorite part of the show....What does that say? Talk to the audience! Ugghhh, this is always death...
Please sign these papers indicating that you did not save Itchy & Scratchy.
Back away, not today disco lady!
Mom, look, I found something more fun than complaining!
There goes the last lingering thread of my heterosexuality.
'Attempted murder?' Now really, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for 'attempted chemistry'?
Where's the stab from every breath that reminds me I'm alive?
I've done everything the Bible says - even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff!
If I wrote down everything you told me to write down, I'd have no time for punching.
Ladies, please. All our founding fathers, astronauts, and World Series heroes have been either drunk or on cocaine.
This movie isn't silent! I can hear it sucking!
My eyes! The goggles do nothing!
Oh, meltdown. It's one of these annoying buzzwords. We prefer to call it an unrequested fission surplus.
Prayer has no place in the public schools, just like facts have no place in organized religion.
Aah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me!
Why, there are no children here at the 4-H club, either. Am I so out of touch? No, it's the children who are wrong.
I don't have such good memory since I drank my thermometer.
Iron helps us play!

Quiz Scoreboard

May contain spoilers

More to Explore

You Might Also Like...

Today's Top Quizzes in Television

Browse Television

Today's Top Quizzes in The Simpsons

Browse The Simpsons

Showdown Scoreboard

More By:

Quiz Plays Rating Category Featured Created
375 4.00 Entertainment Aug 18, 2020
283 5.00 Entertainment Aug 20, 2020
252 2.20 Entertainment Nov 7, 2020
201 2.50 Entertainment Oct 31, 2020
184 2.00 Sports May 24, 2020

Go to Creator's Profile

Your Account Isn't Verified!

In order to create a playlist on Sporcle, you need to verify the email address you used during registration. Go to your Sporcle Settings to finish the process.

Report this User

Report this user for behavior that violates our Community Guidelines.