Television Quiz / 50 South Park Quotes

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Can you name the character who said these South Park quotes?

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'Yeah, I could use some goddamn poontang, myself, right now.'
'This is hopeless. We're just going to have to face that the commercialism has been sucked out of Christmas.'
'My mom says there's a lot of black people in Africa.'
'Shawna, I was wondering if I could put my penis in your vagina.'
'What the hell is this?! Skinless chicken, boiled vegetables and salad?! This is just like Auschwitz!'
'I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried something, I'd be like, HEY! You get your bitch ass back in the kitchen and make me some pie!'
'I was once involved in a drive-by shooting! Whatevah, I do what I want!'
'I think that parents only get so offended by television because they rely on it as a babysitter and the sole educator of their kids.'
'Dude, it's not like terrorism! It is terrorism!'
'But, what if when I'm trying to put on the nose, the snowman comes alive and tries to kill me?'
'Cartman, that's the dumbest thing you've ever said... this week.'
'Yeah, a hippie and a terrorist is the same thing.'
'Your mother's been worried sick! And I've been watching TV.'
'Have you seen the poop swatches?'
'Stan, don't you know the first law of physics? Anything that's fun costs at least eight dollars.'
'Everything is back to normal. I-I think... I think I can go back to trying to destroy the world again.'
'I'm gonna make love to your a**hole, children.'
'Don't get cancer on the ladder, Cartman! You're gonna fall off and break it.'
'Why does nobody believe that I'm serial?'
'Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness! Yummy!'
'I'm beginning to think that maybe it's wrong to put someone who thinks they're a Vietnamese prostitute on a bull.'
'Yeah. Why we sure gave those skanky bitches what for.'
'You know what they say: You can't teach a gay dog straight tricks.'
'Well, your moms are just upset. They’re probably all on their periods or something.'
'You go to hell. You go to hell and you die.'
'Mom-m-m, Ben Affleck is naked in my bed!'
'I don't want to do it if it hurts or if it makes you get all sticky.'
'Dude, this is pretty f**ked up right here.'
'Yeah. You know, we believe in equality for everybody, and tolerance, and all that gay stuff, but dude, f**k you.'
'Dad, Tom Cruise won't come out of the closet!'
'Stan told me to tell you he thinks you're a're a cont, cont, cont...'
'I'm killing you. Unfortunately I could only afford a wiffle bat so this may take a while.'
'Having boobs sucks.'
'Butters, remind me to cut your balls off later.'
'Hello Muhammad, we've read all aboot you in the Qur'an.'
'Hello, is this customer service? I'm having a problem with my new television: it's sprouted laser guns and started walking around shooting people.'
'I promise I'll never go on TV with balls on my chin again.'
'How would YOU feel, if someone came into your home, m'kay, pulled down their pants and laid a big mud monkey right on your mom's face!'
'All animals kill, and the animals that don't kill are stupid ones like cows and turtles and stuff.'
'Then I was right. Jobe has all his children killed, and Michael Bay gets to keep making movies. There isn't a God.'
'You put a guy's wiener in your mouth, that makes you gay, stupid!'
'Yes! I am God of the sea people!'
'I'm not drinking and driving, I'm driving while I'm drinking.'
'I'm so high man, I don't think I can take it.'
'Ohh. I thought a group of Vietnamese people were getting their intestines pulled out through their mouths.'
'Well, excuse my French, Mrs. Marsh, but you can suck my fat hairy balls!'
'James Taylor, what the hell are you doing singing about prostitutes to these children? Get outta here!'
'There’s a time and a place for everything, and it’s called college.”
'It's when you take your finger, and you stick it in a vagina and you stick it again and again.'
'Chef, what would a priest want to stick up my butt?'

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