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I've developed a new philosophy. I only dread one day at a time.
There must be millions of people all over the world who never get any love letters . . . I could be their leader.
My anxieties have anxieties.
I'm not a poor loser, I'm a good loser. I'm so good at it I lose all the time!
Sometimes you lie in bed at night, and you don't have a single thing to worry about...That always worries me!
Yes, ma'am.. I have my report.. ' How I Wasted Another Sunday Afternoon Watching My Dog Sleep.. '.
Happiness is having your own library card.
There are seven continents: Africa, Asia, Australia, Europe, North America, South America, and Aunt Arctica.
How can you do push-ups when your nose gets in the way?
To me, the ugliest sight in the world is an empty dog dish!
Ma'am? What kind of test are we having today? Multiple choice? Good! I choose not to take it!
Ma'am? I don't understand this first question... which ocean are we studying? Could you be more Pacific?
We critical people are always being criticized!
Why shouldn't I complain? It's the only thing I'm really good at!
I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.
Five cents, please.
Come on, Charlie Brown. I'll hold the ball and you kick it.
Curse you, Red Baron!
A watched supper dish never fills.
If you throw that snowball at me, I'll break every bone in your stupid body!
Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker.
Alright, you stupid beagle, I want that blanket back! And I don't mean next month or next week or tomorrow. I want it back today!
There are three things I've learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics, and the Great Pumpkin.
What? Yes, ma'am? The answer's 5. 8? 83? How would it be if I spell 'Mississippi'?
Don't hassle me with your sighs, Chuck!
Stop calling me 'sir'!
I don’t think Beethoven had any nutty females hanging on his piano while he was trying to practice!
I wanna be a nurse when I grow up. I love white shoes!
I'm writing a story for school. It's all about Santa Claus and his rain gear.
Today for 'Show and Tell' I have brought my brother's dog. Which may turn out to be the biggest mistake of my life!
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