Television Quiz / Family Guy Quotes

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Oh, Brian, I can't wait 'til after dinner, 'cause then we'll go home and you can watch me have my period.
When I stick this army guy with the sharp bayonette up my nose, it tickles my brain. Hah hah hah ... ow. Oh, now I don't know math.
Hello, 911? It's ___. Yeah, it's caught in the window this time.
Hey. I'm gonna eat 'cha. I'm gonna eat that hairy leg. I'm gonna eat that other one, too. I can see right up in them shorts. Got lots of rows of teeth to chew you with. Dun-na, Dun
Hold the pickles! God help you if I find pickles!!!
I'd leave my ass behind if it wasn't so perfectly attached to my sternum.
What the deuce?
You can't be ugly and play hard to get, it doesn't work that way. You're already hard to want!
Eh, you're overreacting Lois and you can't spell overreacting without ovary... 'cause you're a girl.
Shut up, Meg
Alright everyone but Chris keep your pants on and lets figure this out
'OMG, Brian there's a message in my Alphabits, it says Ooooooooo'
So, is there any tread left on the tires? Or at this point would it be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?
By all means, turn me into a child star. Perhaps I can move to Californ-i-ay and wrangle me a three-way with the Olsen twins
Hahaha, oh crap I pooped my pants
I can't eat this it'll go straight to my vagina. That what girls worrie about right? Having big vaginas?-
I come bearing a gift. I'll give you a hint. It's in my diaper and it's not a toaster.
Paul... HAHAHAHA Paul.... Thats a persons name... haha.. a persons name.
Oh I was not aware that you can see the future Lois, can I go ahead and get tomorrow's lottery number.
Hello there, Kyle. You like nice today. I see you're wearing your big shorts with the baggy leg holes that flutter so carelessly in the breeze. Would like to come in for a glass of
I'm not going to call an ambulance this time because if I do you won't learn anything.
Come on, let's go drink until we can't feel feelings anymore
Yes, we're gonna douche the night away.
I'm so hungry I could ride a horse.
Uh...boy, this is more awkward than having sex with a rhinoceros who doesn't love you anymore.
Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you - very homosexually.
Buttscratcher! Buttscrather! Buttscratcher!
The government is here! Run, E.T.! Run!
Dammit! I'm missing Boy Meets World for this?
Hey, I f***** your dad
Oh, my God, Jeremy's still in the trunk! How long has it been? Two weeks. Nope, he's dead.
Hey guys, wanna go play some base-(voice drops) ball? Excuse me, I'm gonna go masturbate
Hello Sally, h-hey its ___. Yeah, that's right, senior prom, yeah it's been a listen, um, I just found out that Im retarted and um, I'm just calling to let you know that
Hey Hogzilla, seen my hot wife?
Creamed corn, I brought it from home. I don't like the corn they have here, it's too crunchy
Well excuse me for being retarded. My whole world is turned upside-down. Black is east, up is white
Only saying his name backwards can send him back to the Fifth Dimension, where he belongs.
I didn't have gas for the first time until I was 30.

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Created Dec 3, 2012ReportFavoriteNominate
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