1. Finally, she gives me a date
2. I put on my white tie and tails
3. And brother, did she put on the dog
4. We went around together for some time
5. Painting the town red
6. Going to the stork club
7. And a box at the opera
8. After the opera I got a cocktail
9. And Mary had a Moscow mule
10. At dinner, Mary let her hair down
11. And ate like a horse
12. By then my money was runnin' out on me
13. So I writes a check, it bounced
14. Brother I was really in a pickle
15. The proprietor drew a gun on me
16. But I gave him the slip
17. And hid in the foothills
18. In no time the law was on my heels
19. On the witness stand the judge tried to pump me
20. But it seemed that every time I opened my mouth I put my foot in it
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