Ned: If you think I’m cuddly,
And you want my company,
Come on, Wifey, let me know
Children's Choir: Oh Whacking Day, oh, Whacking Day,
Our hallowed snake skull-cracking day,
We'll break their backs, gouge out their eyes,
Their evil hearts, we'll pulverize,
Oh, Whacking Day, oh, Whacking Day,
May God bestow His grace no thee
Bart & Milhouse: Springfield, Springfield, it's a helluva town!
The Schoolyard's up and the shopping mall's down,
The stray dogs go to the animal pound,
Springfield, Springfield….
Mr. Burns: See my vest, see my vest,
Made from real gorilla chest,
Feel this sweater, there's no better,
Than authentic Irish Setter,
See my hat,'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino,
African endangered rhino
Maude: They say your folks can't pay the rent,
So we're watching you by act of government,
Ned: Well I don't know if the allegations are true,
But you got us, and baby we got you
Oooh! Help me Dr. Zaius!
Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius,
Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius,
Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius, oh, oh, oh, Dr. Zaius
Nelson: ___ __ ___ _____!
The teacher's dead,
We barbecued her head,
What happened to her body?
We flushed it down the potty,
And round and round it goes,
And round and round it…goes…
Shary Bobbins: If you cut every corner,
It is really not so bad,
Everybody does it,
Even Mom and Dad,
If nobody sees it,
Then nobody gets mad.
It's the American way!
Reinier Wolfcastle: Mein bratwurst has a first name,
It's F-R-I-T-Z,
Mein bratwurst has a a second name,
It's S-C-H-N-A-C-K-E-N-P-F-E-F-F-E-R-H-A-U-S-E-N
Homer: Boy, the way the Bee Gees played,
Marge: Movies John Travolta made,
Homer: Guessing how much Elvis weighed,
Both: Those were the days,
Marge: And you knew who you WEEEEEERE then!
Homer: Watching shows like 'Gentle Ben'
Both: Mister, we could use a man like Sheriff Lobo again!
Mark Hamill: Luke, be a Jedi tonight,
Just be a Jedi tonight,
Do it for Yoda, while we serve our guests a soda,
Um, and do it for Chewie, and the Ewoks, and all the other puppets…
Luke, be a Jedi tonight!
Bart: When I can't stop my fiddlin',
I just takes me Ritalin,
I'm poppin' and sailin', man!
This log is your log, this log is my log.
When lightning struck it, it kicked the bucket,
Moe: I poured some onions, inside my trousers,
This log it used to be a tree,
Now it spreads love to you and me,
Hey look it's heading out to sea
Waiters: Happy first 'A' Bart Simpson,
Happy first 'A' to you!
Ned: Well, I've got a date with a girl with no name,
It sure feels good to be back in the game,
At dessert, maybe I can ask her her name,
'Cause I can't pray for her without the right name
Weird Al: Little ditty about Homer and Marge,
Her heart was as big as his stomach was large,
Oh, yeah, they say love goes on,
Long after the grilled cheese sandwich is gone
Moe: Moe, Moe, Moe!
How do you like me? How do you like me?
Moe, Moe, Moe!
Why don't you like me? Nobody likes me…
Ned: We'll be safe inside our fortress when they come,
We'll be safe from creeps and killers when they come,
Unless they have a blow-torch,
Or a poison gas injector,
Then I don't know what will happen when they come
Lisa: Don't vote for me, kids of Springfield,
Unless you want an effective leader,
I'll talk to teachers,
I'll handle Skinner,
A vote for Lisa makes you the winner!
Ned: Here come sandwiches,
Here come sandwiches,
Right down Boozey Bum Lane,
Brother Ned's got cheese on bread,
And a side order of shame
Homer: You're a hero, Homer Jay,
You're as crafty as a skunk,
They'll thank you in the morning,
For stealing Flander's junk,
Homer Ja-ay!
You're a double-bacon genius-burger,
And just a little druuuuunk
Marge murmurs, Maude croaks,
Lisa Buddhist, Homer tokes,
Maggie blows Burns away,
What else do I have to say?!
They'll never stop the Simpsons!
Have no fears, we've got stories for years, like,
Marge becomes a robot…
One! Chorus line of people,
Dancing till they make us stop,
Too! Many dancing people,
Covered with blood, gore and glop,
Just one sniff of that fog and you're inside out,
It's worse than that flesh-eating virus you've read about
Ned: Welcome to the jungle gym,
I'll make it safe again,
When playtime is a safe time everybody wins,
Now, I'll lay down some astro turf,
So they don't scrape their,
Kn-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-nees…
Marge: Scrubbing you,
Is easy 'cause you've been pre-rinsed,
And when you're covered in goo,
That's when I'm scrubbing you,
Scrub-bub-bub-bub-bub,
Scrub-bub-bub-bub-bub…
Pushcake
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