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My wife told me to clear the table.
My sister asked if I could pick up a six-pack of soda.
When is a door not a door?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
If you're Russian when you enter the bathroom, and Finnish when you come out, what are you when you're in the bathroom?
When does a joke become a dad joke?
I kept wondering why the baseball was getting bigger.
I always wondered why the sun went down and came up again.
What's brown and sticky?
I once was addicted to the hokey pokey.
I tried the almond diet.
I quit my job in the shoe recycling factory.
When the frog's car died, he needed a jump
Why was the horse so happy?
What's Forrest Gump's password?
What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
My mom told me to set the oven to 180 degrees.
Who's the boss at McDonald's farm?
What did people use to cut things before scissors?
Yesterday I walked into a bar.
I tried to find a place to waterski.