Music Quiz / FMLyrics II

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Can you name the songs given the FML?

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Today, I didn’t know when to hold them or fold them. I suck at poker. FML.
Today, I'm just an empty space. You're the only one who really knew me at all. FML.
Today, we went for a three hour tour. A three hour tour. FML.
Today, I read the news. Oh boy. FML.
Today, there was blood on my face. I was a big disgrace. FML.
Today, I wished my girlfriend was hot and a freak, like her. But she isn't. FML.
Today, they paved paradise and put up a parking lot. FML.
Today, I walked alone. Well, my shadow was there, but that was it. FML.
Today, I sat on the levee and moaned. I have no place to stay. FML.
Today, I called her, but she couldn't hear a thing. She just kept saying she was busy. FML.
Today, I thought the song was about me. It wasn't. FML
Today, I realized those were the best days of my life. I should have known I'd never get far. FML.
Today, I asked if he spoke-a my language. He just smiled and gave me a Vegemite sandwich. FML.
Today, I was a bad, bad girl. I was careless with a delicate man. FML.
Today, I felt so tired, but I couldn't sleep. Could it be worse? FML.
Today, they stoned me. Just like they said they would. FML.
Today, I was too rough. Your little head came off in my hands. FML.
Today, there were little things I should have said and done. But I never took the time. FML.
Today, I made your daughter cry. I apologized a trillion times... for real. FML.
Today, I got into an accident and couldn't come to school. My hair turned bright white. FML.
Today, I got my head checked by a jumbo jet. It wasn't easy, but nothing is. Woo hoo. FML.
Today, a snake bite entered my veins. I don't even remember why I came. FML.
Today, I had a bellyache and I didn't have a lime. FML
Today, I played with his heart. (I hope my hands were clean). Oops! FML.
Today, I said I was sorry. I didn't think he'd turned around and say it was too late. But he did, and it was. FML.
Today, I put my arms around every boy I see. But they only remind me of U. FML.
Today, my body's too old for workin'. She says my body's too young to look like this. FML.
Today, the temptation. The frustration. It was so bad it made me cry. FML.
Today, I said to myself 'My God, what have I done?' FML.
Today, I finally died. The joke was on me. FML.

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