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Officer Barbrady investigates cattle mutilations.
Wendy becomes suspicious when Cartman wins an essay writing contest.
South Park residents dig a trench to Denver to save themselves.
Jimbo and Ned set up a bomb to fix a football game.
Stan's clone wreaks havoc on the town.
Kenny infects everyone with explosive diarrhea.
Stan is angered when Wendy dresses up as Chewbacca instead of Raggedy Ann.
Chef leads the charge against an army of mutant turkeys.
Philip Glass butchers the school's play.
Cartman cancels his own birthday party when he doesn't get the exact presents he asks for.
The boys try to become lesbians to impress their new teacher.
Kyle gets credit for finding an Anasazi artifact after Cartman throws it away.
Stan and Kyle win second place on America's Funniest Home Videos.
Saddam Hussein captures Celine Dion.
A blizzards forces the residents of South Park to cannibalize the cast and crew of America's Most Wanted.
Officer Barbrady learns how to read.
Mr. Mackey gets married and goes to India on his honeymoon.
Pip becomes the star player on the school dodgeball team.
Jimbo helps the boys write a paper on Vietnam.
Ms. Crabtree starts a new life with a truck driver.
Cartman takes swimming lessons.
Robert Redford demolishes the library to build a Hollywood Planet restaurant.
Gerald and Stuart go on a fishing trip.
Cartman auditions for a Cheesy Poofs commercial.
Randy and Sharon get a divorce.
Cartman thinks he is a Vietnamese prostitute.
Mr. Hat rescues Chef and Mr. Garrison from jail.
Sharon chains Officer Barbrady to the wall in the basement.
The boys discover a fake Mr. Hankey at the mall.
Mr. Garrison assigns a current events paper to his class to avoid getting fired.
Steve Irwin tries to prevent a train from reaching Iowa.
Mr. Mackey forces the boys to join a children's choir.
Stan and Kyle crucify Cartman to give Gerald an erection.
Cartman goes to the optometrist.
Cartman is made an honorary agent of the Department of the Interior.
Kenny takes home economics instead of shop class.
Gerald represents everyone in Everyone vs. Everyone.
Cartman blackmails Shelly.
Stan, Butters, Pip, and Dougie play Charlie's Angels.
Kenny pretends to be Jewish.
The boys dig up Kyle's dead grandmother to scare the 4th graders.
Emperor Hirohito praises President Clinton's big American penis.
Kyle falls in love with a home-schooled girl.
The boys dress up us Tom Brokaw to trick the FBI.
Cartman uses a truckful of schnapps to help him win a bet.
Mr. Garrison goes around the world trying to convert everyone to Christianity.
Stan takes hormone pills.
Mr. Garrison confronts his father about not sexually abusing him.
Kyle has an existential crisis and physically disincorporates.
Clyde tries to help the boys win a sled race against the girls.
Chef gives everyone Ritalout.
Kenny discovers his talent for singing opera.
Kenny accidentally poisons Stuart with abortion pills.
Cartman buys a Kidney Blocker 2000.
Wendy develops feelings for Cartman.
Cartman puts a cucumber down his pants and Timmy botches a music video.
Satan moves in with his boyfriend, Chris.
Saddam Hussein is sent to Heaven as punishment.
The boys turn Timmy's wheelchair into a time machine.
Mr. Garrison's kindergarten class demands a recount for their class president election.
Butters overestimates the production values of the kindergarteners' play.
Estella kills 25 bunnies to prove she has no heart.
Kenny gets arrested for performing oral sex on Howard Stern.
The Kotners try to find a working telephone.
The boys try to make their own cartoon.
Chef takes the boys to the Excalibur Casino to identify a runestone.
Big Gay Al sues the Boy Scouts.
Jesus loses a miracle contest to David Blaine.
Cartman overdubs his own voice over an MTV interview with Radiohead.
The boys skip out on setting up for the Earth Day Brainwashing Festival.
Kyle develops a hemorrhoid and loses his faith in God.
Stan masturbates his dog in front of his parents' book club meeting.
The U.S. Army kidnaps Stan's video game console.
A goat is mistaken for Stevie Nicks.
Kenny's school photo ends up on milk cartons.
The boys play hide & seek to trick Kyle into getting on an airplane.
Token lives with the lions at the zoo.
Cartman tries to sell a truckload of aborted fetuses.
O.J. Simpson, Gary Condit, and the Ramsey's support the Stotches' hunt for some Puerto Rican guy.
