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'X marks the spot, I guess. It's like a big 'you are here' on the map.'
'That's the big dipper! Or the little dipper. I don't know. But it's a dipper.'
'Woah- that hurts my eyes. It's like that star is puking up a sunrise.'
'That's not very creative. It's like they just put a diamond inside another diamond and then covered it in stars.'
'Why is that bear looking at us? It's like he's thinking, 'Hey- if you come over here, I'mma eat you!''
'Is that a C or an eye? Or a C with an eye? It's a C-ing eye flag!'
'They have grapes on their flag? Is that the flag of ancient Rome?'
'Are that farmer and that soldier going to fight over that cow? And why is there a boat in the middle? Is the cow on the boat?'
'Wait- they just took Alabama's flag and put their symbol on it. Can they do that?'
'Wisdom, justice and... moderation??? Did their mom make that flag?!? That's like the 'Hey, eat your peas' of flags.''
'That looks like the U.S. flag and the British flag had a baby. And an ugly baby too.'
'Why is there a deer's head on that shield? Did that woman kill the deer or did the Boy Scout do it?'
'Is that banner coming out of the eagle's mouth? And is he pooping out that sunrise?'
'It's the Olympic torch and a bunch of stars.'
'At least this eagle is flying with its banner. But that's still not a catchy slogan.'
'Those men are shooting those bison. That's awful! And there's a steamboat. Why is there a steamboat?'
'That looks like Daniel Boone shaking hands with a man in a suit. Is that his lawyer?'
'What is that pelican doing to those babies? Is it bleeding on them?!?'
'A farmer, a sailor and a moose under a tree. Do moose even LIVE there?'
'Woah. That looks like a NASCAR flag. Like there was an accident or something.'
'That's really weird. That's like a disembodied arm with a sword rising up to attack that Native American. That's going to give me nightmares.'
'That's two dancing elk bowing down to... BIGFOOT? Why do they have Bigfoot on their flag???'
'The one guy is plowing by hand and the other guy is riding a horse with red hair. Why don't they hook the plow up to the horse?'
'Isn't that the Confederate flag? They do know the Civil War is over, right?'
'There are two bears hugging the state seal. And the state seal is wearing a helmet from a suit of armor.'
'This one's got mountains and trees, and tools, and a river- but no people. That seems right since this state has almost no people.'
'This one's got a train and a blacksmith. Maybe the blacksmith is making train parts.'
'That one's pretty plain. But 'Battle Born' is a cool motto.'
'That's a cool ship, but why is it on land? Did it run aground?'
'Is that a horse head on top of a diving helmet? Is the horse going deep sea diving?'
'That's a cool symbol. It looks kind of like a compass.'
'Is Lady Justice stabbing that eagle with her sword? Why would she do that?'
'That's pretty plain- just two dates and its initials. But... I like it.'
'It looks like that eagle is holding up a giant crown with just a banner. That's a pretty neat trick.'
'I love the shape of this one. It's like the American flag's cooler brother.'
'That's awesome- it's like a Native shield with a bunch of feathers.'
That flag has a beaver on the back! 'Don't mess with us, or we'll sick our beaver on you!'
Prancing bears and prancing elk are weird, but these prancing horses at least make sense.
'Hope'? That's it? Just 'hope'? I HOPE they come up with a better idea next time.'
'Why is that moon backwards? It's like the flag of Turkey, but with a tree.'
'They must have things worth seeing other than Mt. Rushmore.'
'Plain, but still cool. Why is there that blue stripe on the end?'
'I guess they don't call it 'the Lone Star State' for nothing.'
'Apparently their 'industry' is... bees?'
'Ok... a beheaded deer and a cow standing under a tree. I guess it's better to be a cow than a deer there.'
'Did she kill that guy?!? And why is her shirt halfway off?'
'I guess if you name a state after someone you should put his face on your flag.'
'This isn't the flag of Montana, so why does it say 'Montani' on it?'
'Is that a... badger?!? And Popeye's arm? Is this the Popeye-Badger state?'
'That's just their state seal on a bison. If you walked up to a bison and slapped your state seal on it, you probably wouldn't still be alive.'