Homer Simpson or Peter Griffin

Random Television or TV Show Quiz

Can you name the source of these words of wisdom: Homer Simpson ('H') or Peter Griffin ('P')?

Updated Feb 14, 2014

How to Play
Also try: Homerisms
QuoteHomer or Peter
That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!
See, (daughter), things always work out if you just do whatever you want without thinking about the consequences.
Oh my god, (friend), there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'
To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
People make up lies all the time. You know Vietnam? Never happened.
(Daughter), if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.
Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?
Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
If by 'read', you mean 'imagine the naked lady', then yes.
(Son), with $10,000 we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!
I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something.
Now kids, Daddy only drank so that the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.
Aw crap, since when did they change the meaning of 'for' to 'from'?
Math. Math my dear boy is nothing more than the lesbian sister of biology.
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.
All my life I've had one dream, to achieve my many goals.
Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.
Now, I know you're a feminist, and I think that's adorable, but this is grown-up time and I'm the man.
I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming.
They look at me and see a loser. Except that guy with the lazy eye... He sees a loser and a snack machine.
To you she may be worth a million dollars. But to me she's worthless!
Operator! Give me the number for 911!
Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.
Step aside, its time for me to do my fatherly duty. Haha I said duty, but no time to laugh about it now.
(Boss), I can't come to work today because I was in a terrible plane crash. My family is dead and I am a vegetable. See you tomorrow.
I had such a crush on her. Until I met you, (wife). You're my silver medal.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'
Son, this is a big day for you. Today, you become the man of the house, because, when we get home, your mother is going to kill me.
I saw you in that coffee shop, breaking the fifth commandment. Congress passes these things for a reason, (wife).
What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing.
Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.
Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you - very homosexually.
If I'm a child that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if I'm going stand here and take this from a pervert.
Any problem caused by a tank can be solved by a tank.
I got an idea, an idea so smart my head would explode if I even began to know what I was talking about.
(Son), everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that.
I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman.
I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.
We're officially on welfare. Come on, kids. Help me scatter car parts on the front lawn.
I think (boss) picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around.
(Daughter), vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother! I call him Gamblor, and it's time to snatch your mother from his neon claws!
I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!
Oh yeah? Well, according to paragraph 7, sentence 3, word 8 of the Geneva Convention... 'the'.
'To Start Press Any Key.' Where's the 'ANY' key?
Aw, c'mon (wife), isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

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