It also doesn’t help that Cary Elwes and Robin Wright as the loving couple are nearly comatose and inspire little passion from each other, or the audience. – Variety Staff, Variety
She stalks Marty ceaselessly--in her bedroom, and wearing a strapless dress in the front seat of the car, lusting after him noisily. If this delicate situation were a tightrope, our acrobats would be floundering dangerously, hanging on by one desperate elbow. Perhaps the French could manage this Oedi-pull with delicacy; this crew can't. It's an extended joke with a faintly rancid taste. – Sheila Benson, Los Angeles Times
The difference between Roxie Hart and the screen musical is not merely that one is very funny and the other isn't. ... [Title], the musical, has a bitter, puritanical feel beneath its glossy surface. A shallow work without a true moral framework, it sees the world as a posturing showbusiness arena, a stage for celebrities to briefly strut their stuff and go on their way. – Philip French, The Guardian
Do the dinosaurs work? Indeed they do. Does anything else? Not really. – Kenneth Turan, Los Angeles Times
[I]n the utterly routine effort [Title], we’re actually expected to cheer each chord we’ve heard so many times (here’s a martini shaker! Look, it’s a Walther PPK! And there’s an Aston Martin!) – Kyle Smith, New York Post
With any luck, [Title] won’t morph into a Broadway show. If it does, they should do the right thing and call it “Rapunzel.” – Peter Rainer, Christian Science Monitor
This can be funny here and there, but, in the end, there's something hugely distasteful about a movie that is so smug and superior about our relationship to the Third World. By the end of its relatively brief 84-minute running time, the experience becomes downright depressing. – William Arnold, Seattle Post-Intelligencer
There’s too much other information to explain in such a short space, but suffice to say the film treats our capitalist system as the Earth’s ultimate sin. – Christian Toto, Washington Times
The whole movie is a social experiment on a global scale, an ambitious, lavish attempt to see if audiences will turn out for a comic-book epic that goes beyond darkness into Stygian bleakness, grim paradox, endless betrayals and pervasive corruption. – Joe Morgenstern, Wall Street Journal
Save for an emotional ending involving a choice between family and treasure, [Title] is a triumph of technology over spirit. The film looks good but rarely surprises. The feeling of 'we've been here before and enjoyed it more' pervades virtually every frame. – Gene Siskel, Chicago Tribune
But I don't think I'm being too baseball-y when I ask: What exactly *does* he do? I know in real life what he did. I'm talking about in the movie's story. – Will Leitch, Deadspin
But [Title], one of the two or three most expensive movies ever made, and with the biggest event promotion yet, is a cheesy-looking film, with a John Williams “epic” score that transcends self-parody—cosmic fanfares keep coming when there’s nothing to celebrate. – Pauline Kael, New Yorker
I sat through the labored action histrionics of [Title] — run-of-the-mill explosions and ''breathless'' escapes, Bond rolling a tank over cars in St. Petersburg — in a déjà vu stupor. In a sense, the series' creators have stopped even trying to surprise us. – Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly
This movie should have blown us out of the water. Instead we catch ourselves occasionally thinking the unpardonable thought: 'OK, sink already.' – Desson Thomson, Washington Post
If ever a film could have benefited from studio interference, this scattershot cop show send-up is it. Excuse the cliche, but to make a movie this self-indulgent, this long and saddled with this many in-jokes is little short of criminal. – David Edwards, Daily Mirror
People bicker and play word games with each other to hide their true feelings, just like you and me, and yet absolutely nothing is at stake. Perhaps Branagh wanted to show how similar Shakespeare's work was to modern comedy of manners. But what he's done instead is demonstrate how, in the wrong hands, even Shakespeare can be trivialized and reduced to chatter. – Hal Hinson, Washington Post
Its jokes, characters and story line are as wispy as the ghosts themselves, and a good deal less substantial. ... Mr. Murray would be even more welcome if his talents were used in the service of something genuinely witty and coherent, rather than as an end in themselves. – Janet Maslin, New York Times
The fairy tale here is ultimately a business transaction. She doesn’t love his money, but it is nice to have, no? In that sense, [Title] does transcend race. The color that truly matters is green. – Wesley Morris, Boston Globe
[L]ong, long ago in a movie capital far, far away, people dared not tarnish the memory of classics by exhuming them for sequels. – Ralph Novak, People Magazine
We know he is puzzled about which reality he currently occupies because he squinches up his eyebrows. – Bob Graham, San Francisco Chronicle
[C]omputer animation has finally achieved a dismaying marzipan-ness. – Michael Atkinson, Village Voice
[T]he film as a whole labors to contradict any such message by cramming the screen with gleeful mayhem that glorifies every weapon and macho attitude it can squeeze into 135 minutes. – David Sterritt, Christian Science Monitor
The film makers never lose sight of the lowest common denominator at one end of the scale and the yuppie mentality at the other. – Kevin Thomas, Los Angeles Times
As for theme, either there isn't any or else the movie has one - that war reduces human beings to inhumane fighting machines - which (a) is simplistic, and (b) has been much more eloquently stated in other films, not least Kubrick's own 'Dr. Strangelove.' – Ben Yagoda, Philadelphia Daily News
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