E - What nickname does Andy give Jim that will be used throughout the series?
M - Michael invites everyone to the conference: gay, straight, lesbian, and what other group?
H - How long of a paid vacation does Jan offer Oscar to not sue the company?
Oscar: I was going to quit. But Jan offered me a xxxxx-xxxxx paid vacation and a company car. All I had to do was sign something saying I won’t sue. Gill and I are going to Europe. Kids, sometimes it pays to be gay.
S3E2 - The Convention
E - What type of jokes does Michael hope to be a part of someday?
M - How many years do Michael and Pam agree to that if neither of them have a baby they will have one together?
H - What does Michael hope is stained onto the hotel bed?
Michael: Now would you do me the pleasure of hitting the lights, sir?...Woah. What are all those stains? Dwight: Blood, xxxxx or semen. Michael: God I hope it's xxxxx.
S3E3 - The Coup
E - What is Dwight's dentist's name?
M - What popular video game is played at the Stamford branch?
H - Besides women never letting anything go, was other 'defect' does Dwight claim they have?
Dwight: Ever since Michael dumped Jan for Carol, Jan's been bitching out on him. Reject a woman and she will never let it go. One of the many defects of their kind. Also, xxxx xxxx.
S3E4 - Grief Counseling
E - How does Michael's old boss, Ed Truck, die?
M - What type of Herr's chips is Karen looking to get?
H - Dwight claims he is as strong as a grown man and what?
Dwight: When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins, and they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissues made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a xxxxxx xxxx.
S3E5 - Initiation
E - What special day do Michael and Stanley both enjoy at the office?
M - Name any of the two things Dwight claims Michael fears
H - What does Dwight claim is the greatest danger facing Dunder Mifflin?
Dwight: What is the greatest danger facing Dunder Mifflin? Ryan: Outsourcing and consolidation of competition. Dwight: Wrong. Xxxxx xxxxxx.
S3E6 - Diwali
E - Whose family in the office is having a Diwali celebration?
M - Name any of the two things Ryan tells Kelly's parents he's saving his money for
H - What do Kelly's sisters called Ryan in Hindi?
Kelly: Ruka, Nipa, Tiffany. Stop acting like such little losers and just be cool. Come on, Ryan. Come on. Leave him alone. I hate you guys. Ryan: They said something about xxxx xxxxx. Kelly: Don’t even listen to them.
S3E7 - Branch Closing
E - What branch is originally supposed to be closing in this episode?
M - What does Dwight send to David Wallace to have his home address?
H - At what age does Toby say he can finally go to Costa Rica in this episode?
Toby: Well for a minute there, I saw myself selling my house, moving to Costa Rica, learning how to surf. But, Costa Rica will still be there. When I’m xx.
S3E8 - The Merger
E - Name either of the two orientation videos Michael has created for new hires
M - Who does Michael fire in this episode?
H - Who did Michael hang out with the most in the 4th grade?
Michael: See that? Mission accomplished. Like a bunch of fourth graders. Sometimes, what brings the kids together is hating the xxxxx xxxx. Although that’ll change. Because, by the end of the fourth grade, the xxxxx xxxx was actually the person I hung out with the most.
S3E9 - The Convict
E - What 'ex-convict' does Michael get to come speak to the office about his 'prison experience'?
M - What's the worst thing about prison?!?!?!
H - Who does Michael originally believe is the ex-convict in the office?
Michael: I didn't hire an ex-convict. Unless they mean xxxx. Convicted rapist.
S3E10 - A Benihana Christmas Part 1
E - Dwight brings what dead animal into the office to cook?
M - Pam treats Dwight into thinking he is applying for what government agency?
H - What word does Jim use to describe Michael and his Christmas card?
Jim: It’s a xxxx move, to Photoshop yourself into a picture with your girlfriend and her kids on a ski trip with their real father. But then again, Michael’s a xxxx guy. Is xxxx the right word?
S3E11 - A Benihana Christmas Part 2
E - To tell which girl from Benihana is his date, Michael uses what to distinguish between them?
M - What does Dwight win in the office raffle?
H - What is the reason Meredith chooses to go to Pam & Karen's party instead of Angela's?
Angela: Meredith! If you don't come to my party, you will be very, very sorry. Meredith: Is that a threat? Angela: No, it's an invitation. Pam: We have xxxxx! Karen: Lots of it!
S3E12 - Back from Vacation
E - What the topless photo of Jan or Urkel Grue?
M - What city does Jan claim she was in while visiting her sister?
H - What office event did Michael plan his Jamaica vacation to be during to miss it?
Pam: You can't today, we're doing xxxxxxx. Michael: xxxxxxxxx's at the end of December. Pam: We couldn't do it without you so we postponed. Michael: I specifically went on vacation so I would miss it.
S3E13 - Traveling Salesmen
E - Who ends up quitting by the end of the episode?
M - What was Stanley's first choice when picking partners?
H - Out of 10, how many attacks come from the rear?
Jim: After you sir. Dwight: No thank you. I never let anyone walk behind me. xxxxx out of ten attacks are from the rear. Jim: Okay, well that still leaves a 30% chance that I'll attack you from the front. Dwight: Uh, yeah but it'll be easier to stop. I can always block the blow.
S3E14 - The Return
E - Where did Jim put Andy's phone?
M - Name any words Dwight uses to describe himself during his interview?
H - What does Phyllis say her and Dwight have in common?
Phyllis: Dwight has a xxx xxxxxxxxxxx and I have a xxx xxxxxxxxxxx. And a lot of times when two people like that get together it can be explosive.
S3E15 - Ben Franklin
E - Who gave Michael the best advice: Ben Franklin or Elizabeth, the stripper?
M - How many hours did Dwight hire Elizabeth, the stripper for?
H - What is the name of the male strip Michael refers to Jim?
Jim: Michael referred me to a male strip club called, 'xxxxxx xxxxxx'. Instead, I called the Scholastic Speakers of Pennsylvania.
S3E16 - Phyllis' Wedding
E - Who from the office is a member of the band at Phyllis and Bob Vance's wedding?
M - What was the nickname for Phyllis during high school?
H - What movie was Dwight originally trying to see when he accidentally saw Wedding Crashers?
Dwight: I saw Wedding Crashers, accidentally. I bought a ticket for xxxxxx xxx and went into the wrong theatre. After an hour I figured I was in the wrong theatre but I kept waiting. That's the thing about bear attacks, they come when you least expect it.
S3E17 - Business School
E - What animal is found in the office ceiling?
M - Name any candy bar that Michael mentions during the episode?
H - Finish the line: May your hats fly as high as your what?
Michael: Will they throw their hats, you think? Ryan: What? Michael: A lot of times, at a school, or naval academy, after a rousing speech, the crowd would throw its hats high into the air. Ryan: You understand nobody’s graduating. Michael: Yeah, I know, I know. I’m just saying if they did throw their hats I’ve got a great line for that: “May your hats fly as high as your xxxxxx.” That was a pretty good line. Ryan: It doesn’t apply.
S3E18 - Cocktails
E - What dish does Michael bring to the cocktail party?
M - What does Michael put to dot the 'i' in his name?
H - What type of family does Dwight believe lived in David Wallace's home before him?
Dwight: Why would the architect design stairs this wide? Was there an xxxxx family in here before you? Mrs. Wallace: I don't know. I'm sure the architect passed away many years ago. So... Dwight: How convenient.
S3E19 - The Negotiation
E - Who from the office is originally coming to Michael for a raise?
M - What brand of suit is Michael found to be wearing during the episode?
H - What is Ryan's middle name?
Kelly: You are so mean. Ryan: I don't know what you're talking about. Kelly: Yes you do, Ryan xxxxxx Howard. You called me stupid. Ryan: No I said your idea is stupid. Kelly: What is so stupid about wanting to name a baby Usher? Usher Jennifer Hudson Kapoor. Ryan: Don't you see why that's insane? Kelly: Oh, so I'm crazy now?
S3E20 - Safety Training
E - The office switches Creed's apple with what to see if he will eat it without noticing?
M - How long is Dwight planning on shunning Andy for?
H - What does Michael try to visualize for the office to show the serious problems that working in an office can lead to?
Dwight: Michael, what’s wrong?! Michael: Everything’s wrong. The stress of my modern office, has caused me to go into a xxxxxxxxx. Dwight: xxxxxxxxx? Isn’t that just a fancy word for feeling bummed out? Michael: Dwight, you ignorant ****. Depression is a very serious illness. Over 32 thousand people commit suicide every year according to a 2004 study! Dwight: Is that the last year the data was available? Michael: Yes!
S3E21 - Product Recall
E - Name either of the two animals depicted on the obscene watermark within the episode?
M - Michael always ends his apology speeches with a what?
H - What kind of bear is best?
Jim: Question. What kind of bear is best? Dwight: That's a ridiculous question. Jim: False. xxxxx bear. Dwight: That's debatable. There are basically two schools of thought-- Jim: Fact. Bears eat beets. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica. Dwight: Bears do not... What is going on?! What are you doing?!
S3E22 - Women's Appreciation
E - Is it Phyllis or Phallus?
M - Name either of the two stores Angela says she shops for clothes at?
H - What term does Karen call Michael during the conference meeting when he is talking about women in society?
Karen: What you’re saying is extremely xxxxxxxxxx. Michael: Yes. Thank you. That was not necessary, but I appreciated it. And I proves my point. Women can do anything. Karen: I’m saying that you’re being sexist. Michael: No. I’m being xxxxxxxxxx. That is insane. I am not being sexist. Karen: That – it’s the same thing.
S3E23 - Beach Games
E - Who is the only one to make it fully across the firewalk?
M - What is Andy's team name during the beach games?
H - What popular joke does Dwight try and tell at the end of the night, only to leave out the off-color and vulgar pieces you typical hear in the story of the joke?
Dwight: xxx xxxxxxxxx. A man and his wife and his children go into the offices of a talent agency. And the talent agent says, “Describe your act.” And the man says something really, really raunchy and the talent representative says, “What do you call yourselves?” And the man says, “xxx xxxxxxxxx!”
S3E24 - The Job Part 1
E - What website does Michael use to sell his condo?
M - What is imaginary salary when running Hotel Hell with Satan?
H - What term does Michael say is the opposite of shallow?
Michael: No. No, no, no, no. I’ll tell you this, it is not because of the boob job. Excuse me, boob enhancement. That would be shallow. And this is the opposite of shallow. This is… xxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxx.
S3E25 - The Job Part 2
E - Who ends up getting the job at Corporate?
M - Who does David Wallace say would be the only person Jim wouldn't like working in New York on the Corporate team?
H - What is the name of the currency Dwight tries to establish in the office?
Dwight: Don't you wanna earn xxxxxxx xxxxx!? Stanley: No. In fact, I'll give you a billion Stanley Nickels if you never talk to me again. Dwight: What's the ratio of Stanley Nickels to xxxxxxx xxxxx? Stanley: The same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns.
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