amusing Simpsons quotes

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Can you name the Simpsons character who said this?

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QuoteCharacter
No, my ears are really burning. I wanted to see inside so I lit a Q-Tip.
Gotta nuke something.
The pointy kitty took it!
Lisa, our country was founded by a clique - the Continental Congress. Dolphins live in cliques. Those are my two examples.
No, rats can't be trapped this easily. You're trapped like... carrots.
Tell you what - we come back and everyone's slaughtered, I owe you a Coke.
And how come Batman doesn't dance anymore, remember the Bat-tussi?
Roads closed, pipes frozen. Albinos... virtually invisible.
I'm an ugmo.
So then I said to the cop, 'No, you're driving under the influence... of being a jerk!
I thought global warming would take care of it. Al Gore can’t do anything right!
Don't kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about.
Death stalks you at every turn!
Well, it’s kind of a love song… all the monsters, enjoying each other’s company, holding their evil in check.
Homer, organized labor has been called a lumbering dinosaur.
You are noble and poetic in defeat, sir.
It's not up to us to choose which laws we want to obey. If it were, I'd kill everyone who looked at me cockeyed!
QuoteCharacter
Attention, class - in what year was two plus two?
In fifty years, the vacuum cleaner will be quiet and not scary.
They’ve got this thing called a ‘fire drill’ – they use it to drill a flaming hole in your head.
Now who can tell me the atomic weight of balonium?
Eww! That's what we look like inside?! Disgusting! Ugh! That lady swallowed a baby!
How did the badger do that without ripping your shirt?
Honey, you should listen to your heart and not the voices in your head like a certain uncle did, one grave December morn...
I never wanted to be famous for being mean. I wanted to be famous for catching Santa Claus.
I'll just type it up on my invisible typewriter!
Nobody ever says Italy...
I was with IT once, then they change what IT was, now I am not with IT anymore and what IT is scares me.
Bart's quit his tutoring job and joined a violence gang!
I should be able to run over as many kids as I want!
I didn't lie. I was writing fiction with my mouth.
Hey, you know what’s even better is Jesus – he’s like six leprechauns!
Don't you worry about Wikipedia, we'll change it when we get home... We'll change a lot of things.
Don't make fun of grad students. They just... made a terrible life choice.

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