amusing Simpsons quotes

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Can you name the Simpsons character who said this?

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QuoteCharacter
Roads closed, pipes frozen. Albinos... virtually invisible.
And how come Batman doesn't dance anymore, remember the Bat-tussi?
Well, it’s kind of a love song… all the monsters, enjoying each other’s company, holding their evil in check.
You are noble and poetic in defeat, sir.
I'm an ugmo.
Honey, you should listen to your heart and not the voices in your head like a certain uncle did, one grave December morn...
Don't make fun of grad students. They just... made a terrible life choice.
I thought global warming would take care of it. Al Gore can’t do anything right!
The pointy kitty took it!
I never wanted to be famous for being mean. I wanted to be famous for catching Santa Claus.
I was with IT once, then they change what IT was, now I am not with IT anymore and what IT is scares me.
I didn't lie. I was writing fiction with my mouth.
No, my ears are really burning. I wanted to see inside so I lit a Q-Tip.
How did the badger do that without ripping your shirt?
Lisa, our country was founded by a clique - the Continental Congress. Dolphins live in cliques. Those are my two examples.
Don't kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about.
Bart's quit his tutoring job and joined a violence gang!
QuoteCharacter
Eww! That's what we look like inside?! Disgusting! Ugh! That lady swallowed a baby!
Gotta nuke something.
I should be able to run over as many kids as I want!
I'll just type it up on my invisible typewriter!
Don't you worry about Wikipedia, we'll change it when we get home... We'll change a lot of things.
Nobody ever says Italy...
In fifty years, the vacuum cleaner will be quiet and not scary.
Tell you what - we come back and everyone's slaughtered, I owe you a Coke.
Now who can tell me the atomic weight of balonium?
Homer, organized labor has been called a lumbering dinosaur.
Hey, you know what’s even better is Jesus – he’s like six leprechauns!
So then I said to the cop, 'No, you're driving under the influence... of being a jerk!
They’ve got this thing called a ‘fire drill’ – they use it to drill a flaming hole in your head.
No, rats can't be trapped this easily. You're trapped like... carrots.
Attention, class - in what year was two plus two?
Death stalks you at every turn!
It's not up to us to choose which laws we want to obey. If it were, I'd kill everyone who looked at me cockeyed!

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