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| 'Baldrick, you wouldn't spot a subtle plan if it painted itself ______ and danced naked on top of a ___________, singing 'subtle plans are here again'!' | |
| 'I want the dining room table so clean, you could eat your ______ off it.' | |
| 'Madam, life without you is like a broken ______.' 'Explain...' '_________.' | |
| 'I've got a plan so cunning, you could put a ____ on it and call it a ______.' | |
| 'I have two beans, then I add two more beans. What does that make?' 'A very small _________.' | |
| 'I shall return... ________________.' | |
| 'See the little ______, see his little feet...' | |
| 'It's the most pointless book since 'How To Learn _____' was translated into _____.' | |
| 'I heard that the War started when a guy called ______ ____ shot an ostrich because he was hungry.' | |
| 'May the ________ ___ slip from your fire and burn your house down.' | |
| ''________' isn't a dirty word, Blackadder. '_______' is a dirty word, but '________' isn't.' | |
| 'Baldrick, have you any idea what irony is?' 'Yeah, it's like goldy and bronzy only it's made of ____.' | |
| 'We're in the stickiest situation since ______ the _____ ______ got stuck on a sticky bun.' | |
| 'Ah, Blackadder! Started talking to yourself, I see.' 'Yes, it's the only way I can be sure of ___________ ____________.' | |
| 'As cunning as a fox who's just been appointed _________ of _______ at Oxford University?' | |
| 'You are last in God's great chain. Unless there's an ______ around here you'd like to victimise.' | |
| 'Your head is as empty as a ______'s underpants.' | |
| 'Make a note of the word ____________. I like it. I want to use it more often in conversation. | |
| 'Hear the words I sing, war's a horrid thing, so I sing, sing, sing, ____-a-ling-a-ling...' | |
| 'If word gets out that I'm missing, five hundred girls will kill themselves, and I don't want them on my __________ - not when they ought to be on my ____!' | |
| 'God, it's a barren, featureless desert out there, isn't it?' 'The ______ ____, sir!' | |
| ''Yes, it is', not 'That it be'. You don't have to talk in that stupid voice to me. I'm not a _______.' | |
| 'Nursie is a sad, insane old woman with an _____ fixation.' | |
| 'Yes, your Highness. Your very posture tells me 'here is a man of true greatness'.' 'Either that, or 'here are my ________, please kick them'.' | |
| 'May your head fall off at an _______ moment.' | |
| 'Our valued friendship ending with me cutting you into long strips and telling the prince you walked over a very sharp ______ ____ in an extremely _____ ___.' | |
| 'I was wondering if I might have the afternoon off?' 'You can have the afternoon off when you ___, not before.' | |
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| 'I'm going to pump you so full of ____ that I could sharpen you and call you a ______!' | |
| 'If I should die, think only this of me - I'll be ____ to get you!' | |
| 'I don't know what you're talking about, but it sounds damn _____, you lucky thing.' | |
| 'I've got a plan and it's as ___ as my _____!' | |
| 'Baldrick, repeat after me: we are not at ____ to Mr. ____-__ | |
| 'This is a different thing. It's ___________ and it's called wit.' | |
| 'George, who's using the ______ _____ ____ at the moment?' | |
| 'Still the striking resemblance to _____ ____ at feeding time.' | |
| 'Last person I called _______ was pregnant twenty seconds later.' | |
| 'Who would have noticed another ______ around here?' | |
| 'And what's worse is it's going on right here underneath my very nose.' 'Sir, your _________ is lovely.' | |
| 'Never, ever try to be _____ in my presence again.' | |
| 'Fortune ______ on my eiderdown once more.' | |
| 'But cross me and you'll discover that under this playful boyish _________ beats the heart of a ruthless sadistic maniac.' | |
| 'In fact, I'd like to marry you, if you weren't as unattractive as a giant ____.' | |
| 'A war hasn't been fought this badly since Olaf the Hairy, High Chief of all the Vikings, accidentally ordered 80,000 battle helmets with the horns on the ______.' | |
| 'If a hungry cannibal cracked your head open, there wouldn't be enough to cover a small _____ _______.' | |
| 'I know from long experience all my men have the artistic talent of a cluster of colour-blind _________. In a ___.' | |
| 'Some over there aren't fighting, they're just lying down.' 'They're ____, my Lord.' | |
| 'Two million ______, only one Flashheart.' | |
| 'I couldn't be more petrified if a wild __________ had just come home from a hard day at the swamp and found me wearing his pyjamas, smoking his cigars and in bed with his wife.' | |
| 'Their one redeeming feature is their wallets. As capacious as an _________ _______ and just as difficult to get your hands on.' | |
| 'I am therefore leaving immediately for _____, where I intend to live as a ____.' | |
| 'We didn't receive any messages, and Captain Blackadder definitely did not shoot this delicious plump-breasted ______!' | |
| 'Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream, belts off, ________ down, isn't life a ______?' | |
| 'They do say, Mrs. M, that verbal insults hurt more than physical pain. They are of course wrong, as you'll soon discover when I stick this ________ ____ in your head.' | |
| 'I lost closer friends than 'darling Georgie' the last time I was ________.' | |
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| 'Mrs. M, if we were the last three humans on earth, I'd be trying to start a family with ________.' | |
| 'Am I pleased to see you, or did I just put a _____ in my pocket?' | |
| 'Sir, if we do happen to step on a landmine, what do we do?' 'Well, normal procedure, Lieutenant is to jump 200 feet into the air and _______ yourself over a wide area.' | |
| 'I think the phrase rhymes with _______ ___.' | |
| 'What he is trying to tell you is that you appear to be wearing a pair of devil's _________.' | |
| 'The only decent impression he can do is of a man with no ______.' | |
| 'I want to cover every inch of your gorgeous body in ______ and sneeze all over you.' | |
| 'Sorry I'm late.' 'Oh, don't worry about it, I'm sorry you're _____.' | |
| 'The doctor is trying to tell you that he is happy because he has finished his book. It has, apparently, taken him ten years.' 'Yes, well, I am a ____ ______ myself.' | |
| 'In that case, I hope you won't mind if I offer the doctor my most sincere _____________________.' | |
| 'However, I'm a busy man and I can't be bothered to punch you at the moment. Here is my ____, kindly run towards it as fast as you can.' | |
| 'I hope your mother dies in a freak _________ accident.' | |
| 'We live in an age where illness and deformity are ___________ and yet, Ploppy, you are without a doubt the most _________ individual I have ever met.' | |
| 'Once upon a time, there was a lovely little _______ called Baldrick, and it lived happily ever after.' | |
| 'For me, _____ are just like ___, tons of it about, but I never seem to get any.' | |
| 'Baldrick, in the Amazonian rain forests, there are tribes as yet untouched by civilisation who have developed more convincing _______ _______ impressions than yours.' | |
| 'The path of my life is strewn with _______ from the Devil's own _______ herd!' | |
| 'Well, bugger me with a ____ ____.' | |
| 'Oh my God! My ________ have fallen down!' | |
| 'The eyes are open, the mouth moves, but Mr. _____ has long since departed.' | |
| 'I smell something fishy, and I'm not talking about the contents of Baldrick's _____ _______.' | |
| 'I can't see the point in the theatre. All that ___ and violence - I get enough of that at home. Except for the ___, of course.' | |
| 'Are you looking forward to the big push?' 'No, sir, I'm absolutely _________.' | |
| 'I'm going to have a _____, and no one's invited but me.' | |
| 'What I drank last night would have floored a rhinoceros.' 'If it was allergic to ________.' | |
| 'We've been sitting here since Christmas 1914, during which time millions of men have died, and we've moved no further than an _________ ___ with heavy shopping.' | |
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