Dark witch. Right. All I did was perform a little black magic here and there, nothing to worry about. But NOOO!
The king and queen didn't invite me to the celebration of their daugter, all because of my reputation! Whatever happened to 'Don't judge someone from the outside, the inside is what counts'? Huh?
Mom always liked HIM best. HE was Mr. Goody-Two Shoes. Mr. Oh-I'm-Older-So-I-Get-The-Throne-First Goody Two-Shoes.
Well, I admit that I did attack him a few times during our childhood, but that's not the point! The point is he DELIBERATELY had a son, to keep me from the throne!
All I did was sit on his throne! That's all I did! Then he comes to me and fires me, delivering me several definitons on the word 'Fired' as If I was....I was....STUPID!
Seriously, that good-for-nothing eighteen year old better watch himself! For pete's sake All I did was SIT in the CHAIR! I should have stuck with the flea plan (grumbles)
The lamp. That's all I wanted. But, no, I can't have the lamp. Because the stupid cave wants the 'diamond in the rough.' Bah! I'll show you a diamond in the rough you...(sighs).
I get a little ahead of myself sometimes. Anyway, where was I? Ah, yes. The lamp. The lamp that would grant me limitless power to the entire cosmos. Nothing big or special. Just the lamp. And the street rat took it away from me.
I wouldn't have taken the child. I wouldn't have. All I wanted was a hair. A single hair, but of course that didn't help so I HAD to take the kid.
If I wanted to stay young and beautiful I HAD to take the entire package. You understand my reasoning right? And can you imagine how much HAIR I had to clean up? That girl sheds like a cat!
I went to Virginia to get GOLD not Savages! I mean c'mon! As if it wasn't bad enough I had to order my men to dig, but I had to deal with blood-shedding Savages as well?
Uh, NO! I didn't sign up for that! Nope, not at all. I just wanted something to be remembered by. Gold, not the person who almost killed one of his own men when he stupidly jumped in front of the gun and I got sent to jail for it. NO!
Everything was going swell until that little brat showed up at my place. She messed up everything! And when I gave her a little bit of dicipline, she goes and starts mouthing off!
But I wasn't going to stand to that. Oh-no! I don't deal well with little children coming and ruining my kingdom! Parents don't take of their kids that's the problem!
Basically what the person above me said! Kids these days are just out there to wreck people's lives! This particular boy keeps stealing my treasure!
For no reason at all! And on top of that, he fed my hand to a crocodile! And the worst thing of all, he dosn't get OLD! He won't mature, and I'll keep getting harrassed by him.
Okay, okay, I admit, I put it on myself. I thought I could trick a prince into marrying a rich girl and giving me a good amount of the money. But it didn't work.
A stupid girl had to interfere. If it weren't for her, I wouldn't have been attacked by my so-called friends. Some friends they are, dragging me to hell and all....
Hey, don't put the blame on ME! He put the guy in my chamber! EVERYONE knows you don't put someone in my chamber if you don't want them eaten! So I was getting ready to eat him,
then HE came back and attacked me as if I was the bad guy! And I was like, Uh-uh! you can't just stroll in here and take him back, killing me in the process! What's up with that? Dumb people. (grumbles)