| Quotes | Character |
|---|
| 'This is where our daughter or gay son will sleep.' | |
| 'Don't have the time, don't have the uterus.' | |
| 'Have you ever liked somebody so much you just want to lock yourself in your room, turn on sad music and cry?' | |
| 'Who is Josh Groban? Kill yourself!' | |
| 'Your wife is going to be pushing a watermelon out of her boy-howdy in five months!' | |
| 'Oh bambi...I cried so hard when those hunters shot your mommy...' | |
| 'Hey, ankle grabber. I slept with your mom. No, really. Nice Star Wars sheets.' | |
| 'We're planning on smacking them down like the hand of God.' | |
| 'I'm rolling on a fistful of horse tranquilizers. I can't feel my lips.' | |
| 'I like minorities so much, I'm thinking of moving to California to become one.' | |
| | Quotes | Character |
|---|
| 'I will go to the animal shelter and get you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat. And then on some dark, cold night, I'll steal away into your home and pun | |
| 'Rachel was a hot Jew, and the good Lord wanted me to get in her pants.' | |
| 'My body is like a rum chocolate souffle. If I don't warm it up right, it won't rise.' | |
| 'If I don't get enough sleep, my anti-depressants won't work and then I'll go crazy and I'll kill you!' | |
| 'He's cheating off a girl who thinks the square root of four is rainbows' | |
| 'Cause my sexts are too hot to erase!' | |
| 'I'm going to say this as nice as I can, but you look like a sad clown hooker.' | |
| 'I need something I can shake my moneymaker to' | |
| 'Dear Journal, feeling listless again today. It began at dawn when I tried making a slushie out of beef bones, breaking my juicer.' | |
| 'I need to keep those parents happy! They found out we've been serving the children prison food!' | |
|
Twilight Characters by Quote
Star Wars Character by Quote
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
