Gaming / League of Legends' champions by joke

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Can you name the League of Legends champions by joke?

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'I haven't got a brain, and soon neither will you!'
'So many noobs... will matchmaking ever find true balance?'
'I am an artist with a sword, in more ways than one.'
'A sniper's greatest tool is precision... And good equipment.'
'Bandle citeh — Oops, forgot the clutch.'
'I like my weapons how I like my music: heavy and metal!'
'You can call me mistress, but only from your knees.'
'Hand bone connected to the axe bone connected to your face bone!'
'This is why I spend so much time sheath shopping.'
'Double rainbow? What does it mean?'
'Imagine if I had a real weapon!'
'I have no time for nonsense.'
'This dress may have been impractical.'
'Laying an egg isn't as easy as it looks.'
'Hmm, fish, fish, fish!'
'Suffering is magic.'
'Size doesn't mean everything.'
'Let's be firends forever.'
'If PETA asks, this fur is fake.'
'I think I broke a nail. Good thing it wasn't mine.'
'Yes, a baker.'
'Come try your luck, if you think you're in my league.'
'For my next trick, I'll make their life bar disappear.'
'You can't milk those.'
'Jokes? I don't know any jokes.'
'*sigh* I knew I should have sprung for the blade warranty.'
'Oh, what's that smell? Ah, it's me...'
'Uuugh! Bugs are gross!'
'Let me help shuffle off your mortal coil.'
'Power laning, power farming, power ganking, power kills! So many kills! Four-hundred kills!'
'You can't beat me, so join me. I need a good pair of legs.'
'Joke? What do you mean?'
'My profession...! You know, now that I think of it, I've always wanted to be a baker.'
'I may be bad, but I feel good...'
'Hey, get up. *sigh* How many times have I told you: 'No sleeping during battle!''
'Find me and a immovable object, and I'll put this question to rest!'
'If we approach strategically from the flank... Oh who am I kidding, let's just morph and eat them.'
'If light travels so fast, how come it's never caught a ninja?'
'Time for the Dance Macca... Macah... Forget it.'
'Blindness is no impairment against a smelly enemy.'
'Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom!'
'Come on! Does this look dangerous to you?'
'They come apart so easily. How do I put them back together again?'
'Lima Oscar Lima!'
'Time flies like an arrow. Fruits fly like banana.'
'Who let the dogs out? Woof. Woof. Woof.'
'Is that a rocket in your pocket?'
'Hmm, something's fishy.'
'Noxians... I hate thouse guys.'
'Ah, the tangled webs we weave...'
'The key to the — uhh... Huh?! That is the — uhh... What?! Urgh! Keep your hand to yourself!'
'Caught between a rock... And a hard place.'
'Gems, gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.'
'How do you like my guns: Shock and Awe!'
'Oh no! I seem to have stepped on one of my cousins!'
'I put the ''goal'' in ''golem.'' That was humor. Other golems find that to be appropriatelly funny.'
'I tried to silence my mother once. Boy, did I regret that.'
'When you fall, you get right back up.'
'Wanna know why me Roger is so Jolly? Heheheh...'
'You wanna se how to disarm a bomb?'
'You're seriously asking a giant demon bird... for a joke?'
'Nature is the truest form of balance. Eat and avoid being eaten *omnom*.'
'Sometimes I think this anchor just weights me down.'
'Balance in all things.'
'Talent, honor, discipline, and pretty pictures!'
'Shhh! I'm charging my laser...'
'Awareness is the key to victory! Be sure you never let your guard dow — awwowawwoah.'
'Yes, they make shurikens this small!'
'Say hello to the winds of — *cough cough* *clears throat* — Oh, I don't know what came over me.'
'Sunder any army, crumble any mountain, leap the great — owwaww... My toesies.'
'The only time I have a drinking problem is when I spill it!'
'Well, a ''double rainbow'' is a pehnomenon of optics that displays a spectrum of light due to the sun shining on droplets of moisture in the atmosphere. Does that explain it?'
'Summon me and you'll like the way you look. I Garen-tee it. Get it?'
'The whole is greater than the sum of its... parts.'
'Mundo say his own name a lot, or else he forget! Has happened before.'
'I cannot use your skull. You have a misshapen head.'
'No, really. Put that apple on your head.'
'I could go for a twirl. Whoa, whoa, whoa!'
'Not all angels are good.'
'No matter how far it is to the top, it's still withing my grasp!'
'If you'd like to play with me, you'd better be sure to know the game.'
'What? Do I have something in my teeth?'
'Wuju... pass me that potion?'
'Did I mention it's mating season.'
'Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt!'
'What do you get when a dragon sneezes? Out of the way.'
'Lying is, like, 95% of what I do.'
'The worst part about losing a blade is trying to trace back all my stabbings.'
'I like my enemies two ways: dead, or about to be.'
'My blade is not only precise, but totally gnarly.'
'I think I might know a relative of yours. No hair... sagging flesh... always going on about brains. Ring any bells?'
'Don't hate the player, hate the club that's smashing your face!'
'Guess what's about to hit the fan.'
'Go ahead, be negative. You'll be just my type.'
'For my next trick, I'll make you disappear.'
'My right arm is a lot stronger than my left arm!'
'Shaken, not stirred.'
'Ugh, I've lost another blade. I wonder who it's in this time.'
'They say the key to beauty lies in grace and poise. What do you think?'
'Yes, it's true. For only $2.95 a minute, I will leave you breathless.'
'You'd like some real amusement? Come closer.'
'How much you wanna bet I can whack you from one fountain to the other?'
'Weather forecast for tonight: dark, with a chance of pain!'
'Only two Jokers in the deck, and I get dealt you.'
'Is it hot in here os is it just me?!'
'Another blue ribbon for Hecarim.'
'Turbo on! Uh... wuuh? *crash* Just needs a little kick start here. Hyup.'
'Don't stare directly at me for too long.'
'Speak softly, and ride a big yeti!'
'Hey, wake up! *sigh* No dinner for you tonight.'
'The worth of a man can be measured by the lenght of his beard, and the girth of his belt buckle.'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! How does he do it?'
'Two birds with one stone... Have you met my parents?'
'Are you sure you're not in the wrong league?'
'Everyone's a hero... Till you shoot off a leg or two.'
'*Burp* I think a voidling just came out!'
'No, I'm not happy to see you. Yes, that is a horn growing out of my head.'
'Seriously, again?! Just drop it!'
'I got these tattoos in rune prision!'
'Hmm, I suppose you're expecting an unbearable pun.'
'All the better to eat you with my dear!'
'Think logically for ONE SECON — CAW CAW CAWCAWCAW!'
'Let's put on our thinking caps. Hmm... Ah, I got it!'
'When you dance with deat, lead.'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! Dizzy.'
'Listen close — Huh... I have important — Argh! This is why I can't take you nice places!'
'Why do chemists call helium, curium and barium 'the medical elements'? Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'! Heheh.'
'I bet I can hit their base from here!'
'What's black and blue and is about to show you the definition of pain?'
'Animals are lazy. We plants produce our own food *omnom*.'
'Let's end this quickly... *cough* I need to use the little soldier's room.'

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