League of Legends' champions by joke

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Can you name the League of Legends champions by joke?

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'When you dance with deat, lead.'
'Hmm, I suppose you're expecting an unbearable pun.'
'Come try your luck, if you think you're in my league.'
'You can't milk those.'
'They come apart so easily. How do I put them back together again?'
'Think logically for ONE SECON — CAW CAW CAWCAWCAW!'
'Are you sure you're not in the wrong league?'
'Oh, what's that smell? Ah, it's me...'
'I have no time for nonsense.'
'All the better to eat you with my dear!'
'Only two Jokers in the deck, and I get dealt you.'
'Hmm, fish, fish, fish!'
'Wanna know why me Roger is so Jolly? Heheheh...'
'My right arm is a lot stronger than my left arm!'
'Hey, get up. *sigh* How many times have I told you: 'No sleeping during battle!''
'Two birds with one stone... Have you met my parents?'
'Double rainbow? What does it mean?'
'Imagine if I had a real weapon!'
'Well, a ''double rainbow'' is a pehnomenon of optics that displays a spectrum of light due to the sun shining on droplets of moisture in the atmosphere. Does that explain it?'
'No matter how far it is to the top, it's still withing my grasp!'
'Not all angels are good.'
'Time flies like an arrow. Fruits fly like banana.'
'Ah, the tangled webs we weave...'
'You're seriously asking a giant demon bird... for a joke?'
'Let's end this quickly... *cough* I need to use the little soldier's room.'
'Why do chemists call helium, curium and barium 'the medical elements'? Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'! Heheh.'
'Yes, a baker.'
'Another blue ribbon for Hecarim.'
'I cannot use your skull. You have a misshapen head.'
'Turbo on! Uh... wuuh? *crash* Just needs a little kick start here. Hyup.'
'I tried to silence my mother once. Boy, did I regret that.'
'No, I'm not happy to see you. Yes, that is a horn growing out of my head.'
'Hey, wake up! *sigh* No dinner for you tonight.'
'Let's put on our thinking caps. Hmm... Ah, I got it!'
'I think I broke a nail. Good thing it wasn't mine.'
'My profession...! You know, now that I think of it, I've always wanted to be a baker.'
'I may be bad, but I feel good...'
'Seriously, again?! Just drop it!'
'Lima Oscar Lima!'
'Lying is, like, 95% of what I do.'
'The worth of a man can be measured by the lenght of his beard, and the girth of his belt buckle.'
'Shhh! I'm charging my laser...'
'Don't hate the player, hate the club that's smashing your face!'
'Who let the dogs out? Woof. Woof. Woof.'
'The only time I have a drinking problem is when I spill it!'
'How much you wanna bet I can whack you from one fountain to the other?'
'Come on! Does this look dangerous to you?'
'Hmm, something's fishy.'
'This dress may have been impractical.'
'The worst part about losing a blade is trying to trace back all my stabbings.'
'Gems, gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.'
'I haven't got a brain, and soon neither will you!'
'This is why I spend so much time sheath shopping.'
'Time for the Dance Macca... Macah... Forget it.'
'Balance in all things.'
'Guess what's about to hit the fan.'
'Power laning, power farming, power ganking, power kills! So many kills! Four-hundred kills!'
'If PETA asks, this fur is fake.'
'The key to the — uhh... Huh?! That is the — uhh... What?! Urgh! Keep your hand to yourself!'
'If light travels so fast, how come it's never caught a ninja?'
'Laying an egg isn't as easy as it looks.'
'I bet I can hit their base from here!'
'Talent, honor, discipline, and pretty pictures!'
'How do you like my guns: Shock and Awe!'
'Is it hot in here os is it just me?!'
'*Burp* I think a voidling just came out!'
'Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt!'
'I like my weapons how I like my music: heavy and metal!'
'Caught between a rock... And a hard place.'
'Awareness is the key to victory! Be sure you never let your guard dow — awwowawwoah.'
'Bandle citeh — Oops, forgot the clutch.'
'If we approach strategically from the flank... Oh who am I kidding, let's just morph and eat them.'
'Did I mention it's mating season.'
'If you'd like to play with me, you'd better be sure to know the game.'
'Ugh, I've lost another blade. I wonder who it's in this time.'
'Hand bone connected to the axe bone connected to your face bone!'
'I think I might know a relative of yours. No hair... sagging flesh... always going on about brains. Ring any bells?'
'For my next trick, I'll make you disappear.'
'When you fall, you get right back up.'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! Dizzy.'
'Sunder any army, crumble any mountain, leap the great — owwaww... My toesies.'
'Mundo say his own name a lot, or else he forget! Has happened before.'
'You'd like some real amusement? Come closer.'
'For my next trick, I'll make their life bar disappear.'
'Wuju... pass me that potion?'
'Blindness is no impairment against a smelly enemy.'
'Summon me and you'll like the way you look. I Garen-tee it. Get it?'
'The whole is greater than the sum of its... parts.'
'Sometimes I think this anchor just weights me down.'
'Nature is the truest form of balance. Eat and avoid being eaten *omnom*.'
'Everyone's a hero... Till you shoot off a leg or two.'
'What? Do I have something in my teeth?'
'Is that a rocket in your pocket?'
'Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom!'
'Let me help shuffle off your mortal coil.'
'So many noobs... will matchmaking ever find true balance?'
'A sniper's greatest tool is precision... And good equipment.'
'You wanna se how to disarm a bomb?'
'*sigh* I knew I should have sprung for the blade warranty.'
'Weather forecast for tonight: dark, with a chance of pain!'
'Find me and a immovable object, and I'll put this question to rest!'
'Noxians... I hate thouse guys.'
'What's black and blue and is about to show you the definition of pain?'
'Uuugh! Bugs are gross!'
'Yes, it's true. For only $2.95 a minute, I will leave you breathless.'
'I like my enemies two ways: dead, or about to be.'
'I got these tattoos in rune prision!'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! How does he do it?'
'Let's be firends forever.'
'No, really. Put that apple on your head.'
'I could go for a twirl. Whoa, whoa, whoa!'
'Go ahead, be negative. You'll be just my type.'
'My blade is not only precise, but totally gnarly.'
'Say hello to the winds of — *cough cough* *clears throat* — Oh, I don't know what came over me.'
'They say the key to beauty lies in grace and poise. What do you think?'
'Yes, they make shurikens this small!'
'Size doesn't mean everything.'
'Suffering is magic.'
'Oh no! I seem to have stepped on one of my cousins!'
'Joke? What do you mean?'
'Animals are lazy. We plants produce our own food *omnom*.'
'I put the ''goal'' in ''golem.'' That was humor. Other golems find that to be appropriatelly funny.'
'Speak softly, and ride a big yeti!'
'You can't beat me, so join me. I need a good pair of legs.'
'You can call me mistress, but only from your knees.'
'Listen close — Huh... I have important — Argh! This is why I can't take you nice places!'
'I am an artist with a sword, in more ways than one.'
'Don't stare directly at me for too long.'
'What do you get when a dragon sneezes? Out of the way.'
'Jokes? I don't know any jokes.'
'Shaken, not stirred.'

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