Gaming / League of Legends' champions by joke

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Can you name the League of Legends champions by joke?

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JokeChampion
'The key to the — uhh... Huh?! That is the — uhh... What?! Urgh! Keep your hand to yourself!'
'I think I broke a nail. Good thing it wasn't mine.'
'Talent, honor, discipline, and pretty pictures!'
'Hey, get up. *sigh* How many times have I told you: 'No sleeping during battle!''
'I got these tattoos in rune prision!'
'Nature is the truest form of balance. Eat and avoid being eaten *omnom*.'
'Yes, it's true. For only $2.95 a minute, I will leave you breathless.'
'Ugh, I've lost another blade. I wonder who it's in this time.'
'Noxians... I hate thouse guys.'
'Blindness is no impairment against a smelly enemy.'
'I tried to silence my mother once. Boy, did I regret that.'
'Come try your luck, if you think you're in my league.'
'Hey, wake up! *sigh* No dinner for you tonight.'
'I put the ''goal'' in ''golem.'' That was humor. Other golems find that to be appropriatelly funny.'
'Let me help shuffle off your mortal coil.'
'I am an artist with a sword, in more ways than one.'
'Speak softly, and ride a big yeti!'
'The whole is greater than the sum of its... parts.'
'What do you get when a dragon sneezes? Out of the way.'
'Only two Jokers in the deck, and I get dealt you.'
'You can't beat me, so join me. I need a good pair of legs.'
'Lima Oscar Lima!'
'Two birds with one stone... Have you met my parents?'
'Balance in all things.'
'My profession...! You know, now that I think of it, I've always wanted to be a baker.'
'If you'd like to play with me, you'd better be sure to know the game.'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! Dizzy.'
'Let's put on our thinking caps. Hmm... Ah, I got it!'
'Say hello to the winds of — *cough cough* *clears throat* — Oh, I don't know what came over me.'
'Hand bone connected to the axe bone connected to your face bone!'
'Did I mention it's mating season.'
'My right arm is a lot stronger than my left arm!'
'They come apart so easily. How do I put them back together again?'
JokeChampion
'Not all angels are good.'
'Jokes? I don't know any jokes.'
'You can call me mistress, but only from your knees.'
'Find me and a immovable object, and I'll put this question to rest!'
'Seriously, again?! Just drop it!'
'My blade is not only precise, but totally gnarly.'
'*Burp* I think a voidling just came out!'
'When you fall, you get right back up.'
'Come on! Does this look dangerous to you?'
'Time for the Dance Macca... Macah... Forget it.'
'Another blue ribbon for Hecarim.'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! How does he do it?'
'If PETA asks, this fur is fake.'
'Are you sure you're not in the wrong league?'
'What's black and blue and is about to show you the definition of pain?'
'Imagine if I had a real weapon!'
'Turbo on! Uh... wuuh? *crash* Just needs a little kick start here. Hyup.'
'I like my weapons how I like my music: heavy and metal!'
'I think I might know a relative of yours. No hair... sagging flesh... always going on about brains. Ring any bells?'
'Animals are lazy. We plants produce our own food *omnom*.'
'Go ahead, be negative. You'll be just my type.'
'Let's end this quickly... *cough* I need to use the little soldier's room.'
'Suffering is magic.'
'Think logically for ONE SECON — CAW CAW CAWCAWCAW!'
'Don't stare directly at me for too long.'
'All the better to eat you with my dear!'
'Laying an egg isn't as easy as it looks.'
'Hmm, something's fishy.'
'Uuugh! Bugs are gross!'
'I may be bad, but I feel good...'
'Yes, a baker.'
'If light travels so fast, how come it's never caught a ninja?'
'Guess what's about to hit the fan.'
JokeChampion
'You're seriously asking a giant demon bird... for a joke?'
'I have no time for nonsense.'
'Don't hate the player, hate the club that's smashing your face!'
'The worth of a man can be measured by the lenght of his beard, and the girth of his belt buckle.'
'I haven't got a brain, and soon neither will you!'
'Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom!'
'Everyone's a hero... Till you shoot off a leg or two.'
'Summon me and you'll like the way you look. I Garen-tee it. Get it?'
'Weather forecast for tonight: dark, with a chance of pain!'
'Shhh! I'm charging my laser...'
'What? Do I have something in my teeth?'
'Awareness is the key to victory! Be sure you never let your guard dow — awwowawwoah.'
'Well, a ''double rainbow'' is a pehnomenon of optics that displays a spectrum of light due to the sun shining on droplets of moisture in the atmosphere. Does that explain it?'
'For my next trick, I'll make their life bar disappear.'
'*sigh* I knew I should have sprung for the blade warranty.'
'Sunder any army, crumble any mountain, leap the great — owwaww... My toesies.'
'No, really. Put that apple on your head.'
'Is it hot in here os is it just me?!'
'Gems, gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.'
'Listen close — Huh... I have important — Argh! This is why I can't take you nice places!'
'Is that a rocket in your pocket?'
'Bandle citeh — Oops, forgot the clutch.'
'How much you wanna bet I can whack you from one fountain to the other?'
'This is why I spend so much time sheath shopping.'
'For my next trick, I'll make you disappear.'
'Sometimes I think this anchor just weights me down.'
'The worst part about losing a blade is trying to trace back all my stabbings.'
'I could go for a twirl. Whoa, whoa, whoa!'
'I bet I can hit their base from here!'
'Size doesn't mean everything.'
'A sniper's greatest tool is precision... And good equipment.'
'Why do chemists call helium, curium and barium 'the medical elements'? Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'! Heheh.'
'Power laning, power farming, power ganking, power kills! So many kills! Four-hundred kills!'
JokeChampion
'So many noobs... will matchmaking ever find true balance?'
'You'd like some real amusement? Come closer.'
'No matter how far it is to the top, it's still withing my grasp!'
'Wanna know why me Roger is so Jolly? Heheheh...'
'Hmm, I suppose you're expecting an unbearable pun.'
'Time flies like an arrow. Fruits fly like banana.'
'Hmm, fish, fish, fish!'
'Double rainbow? What does it mean?'
'Lying is, like, 95% of what I do.'
'Oh, what's that smell? Ah, it's me...'
'When you dance with deat, lead.'
'How do you like my guns: Shock and Awe!'
'The only time I have a drinking problem is when I spill it!'
'Joke? What do you mean?'
'Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt!'
'Oh no! I seem to have stepped on one of my cousins!'
'Who let the dogs out? Woof. Woof. Woof.'
'Wuju... pass me that potion?'
'You wanna se how to disarm a bomb?'
'Mundo say his own name a lot, or else he forget! Has happened before.'
'This dress may have been impractical.'
'Shaken, not stirred.'
'Let's be firends forever.'
'Ah, the tangled webs we weave...'
'Caught between a rock... And a hard place.'
'I cannot use your skull. You have a misshapen head.'
'You can't milk those.'
'Yes, they make shurikens this small!'
'If we approach strategically from the flank... Oh who am I kidding, let's just morph and eat them.'
'I like my enemies two ways: dead, or about to be.'
'They say the key to beauty lies in grace and poise. What do you think?'
'No, I'm not happy to see you. Yes, that is a horn growing out of my head.'

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