League of Legends' champions by joke

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Can you name the League of Legends champions by joke?

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'Awareness is the key to victory! Be sure you never let your guard dow — awwowawwoah.'
'I like my weapons how I like my music: heavy and metal!'
'What do you get when a dragon sneezes? Out of the way.'
'Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt! Lighning bolt!'
'Mundo say his own name a lot, or else he forget! Has happened before.'
'Jokes? I don't know any jokes.'
'Let's be firends forever.'
'Only two Jokers in the deck, and I get dealt you.'
'When you dance with deat, lead.'
'You can't milk those.'
'If PETA asks, this fur is fake.'
'Go ahead, be negative. You'll be just my type.'
'They come apart so easily. How do I put them back together again?'
'Listen close — Huh... I have important — Argh! This is why I can't take you nice places!'
'Shhh! I'm charging my laser...'
'Suffering is magic.'
'I am an artist with a sword, in more ways than one.'
'How do you like my guns: Shock and Awe!'
'I think I might know a relative of yours. No hair... sagging flesh... always going on about brains. Ring any bells?'
'All the better to eat you with my dear!'
'The whole is greater than the sum of its... parts.'
'Hmm, something's fishy.'
'Nature is the truest form of balance. Eat and avoid being eaten *omnom*.'
'If light travels so fast, how come it's never caught a ninja?'
'Another blue ribbon for Hecarim.'
'Think logically for ONE SECON — CAW CAW CAWCAWCAW!'
'This is why I spend so much time sheath shopping.'
'You'd like some real amusement? Come closer.'
'Weather forecast for tonight: dark, with a chance of pain!'
'Noxians... I hate thouse guys.'
'Don't stare directly at me for too long.'
'Well, a ''double rainbow'' is a pehnomenon of optics that displays a spectrum of light due to the sun shining on droplets of moisture in the atmosphere. Does that explain it?'
'Hey, get up. *sigh* How many times have I told you: 'No sleeping during battle!''
'Oh no! I seem to have stepped on one of my cousins!'
'Joke? What do you mean?'
'If we approach strategically from the flank... Oh who am I kidding, let's just morph and eat them.'
'Lying is, like, 95% of what I do.'
'Two birds with one stone... Have you met my parents?'
'My profession...! You know, now that I think of it, I've always wanted to be a baker.'
'Guess what's about to hit the fan.'
'The worst part about losing a blade is trying to trace back all my stabbings.'
'This dress may have been impractical.'
'Is it hot in here os is it just me?!'
'Why do chemists call helium, curium and barium 'the medical elements'? Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'! Heheh.'
'Gems, gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.'
'Say hello to the winds of — *cough cough* *clears throat* — Oh, I don't know what came over me.'
'I like my enemies two ways: dead, or about to be.'
'Uuugh! Bugs are gross!'
'Yes, it's true. For only $2.95 a minute, I will leave you breathless.'
'They say the key to beauty lies in grace and poise. What do you think?'
'My right arm is a lot stronger than my left arm!'
'Not all angels are good.'
'Let's end this quickly... *cough* I need to use the little soldier's room.'
'I haven't got a brain, and soon neither will you!'
'The only time I have a drinking problem is when I spill it!'
'Lima Oscar Lima!'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! Dizzy.'
'Time for the Dance Macca... Macah... Forget it.'
'Yes, they make shurikens this small!'
'Sometimes I think this anchor just weights me down.'
'You can call me mistress, but only from your knees.'
'Everyone's a hero... Till you shoot off a leg or two.'
'Wanna know why me Roger is so Jolly? Heheheh...'
'Come try your luck, if you think you're in my league.'
'A sniper's greatest tool is precision... And good equipment.'
'Who let the dogs out? Woof. Woof. Woof.'
'Noxuuu... whoa... whoa! How does he do it?'
'I may be bad, but I feel good...'
'You're seriously asking a giant demon bird... for a joke?'
'Animals are lazy. We plants produce our own food *omnom*.'
'No, I'm not happy to see you. Yes, that is a horn growing out of my head.'
'Double rainbow? What does it mean?'
'Ugh, I've lost another blade. I wonder who it's in this time.'
'Talent, honor, discipline, and pretty pictures!'
'You wanna se how to disarm a bomb?'
'My blade is not only precise, but totally gnarly.'
'*sigh* I knew I should have sprung for the blade warranty.'
'Hey, wake up! *sigh* No dinner for you tonight.'
'*Burp* I think a voidling just came out!'
'How much you wanna bet I can whack you from one fountain to the other?'
'I think I broke a nail. Good thing it wasn't mine.'
'If you'd like to play with me, you'd better be sure to know the game.'
'I tried to silence my mother once. Boy, did I regret that.'
'Seriously, again?! Just drop it!'
'I got these tattoos in rune prision!'
'Caught between a rock... And a hard place.'
'I cannot use your skull. You have a misshapen head.'
'Size doesn't mean everything.'
'Speak softly, and ride a big yeti!'
'I put the ''goal'' in ''golem.'' That was humor. Other golems find that to be appropriatelly funny.'
'What's black and blue and is about to show you the definition of pain?'
'Turbo on! Uh... wuuh? *crash* Just needs a little kick start here. Hyup.'
'Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom!'
'Did I mention it's mating season.'
'I bet I can hit their base from here!'
'Bandle citeh — Oops, forgot the clutch.'
'Ah, the tangled webs we weave...'
'The key to the — uhh... Huh?! That is the — uhh... What?! Urgh! Keep your hand to yourself!'
'Laying an egg isn't as easy as it looks.'
'Time flies like an arrow. Fruits fly like banana.'
'The worth of a man can be measured by the lenght of his beard, and the girth of his belt buckle.'
'Yes, a baker.'
'I have no time for nonsense.'
'Wuju... pass me that potion?'
'Find me and a immovable object, and I'll put this question to rest!'
'Summon me and you'll like the way you look. I Garen-tee it. Get it?'
'What? Do I have something in my teeth?'
'Hmm, fish, fish, fish!'
'For my next trick, I'll make their life bar disappear.'
'When you fall, you get right back up.'
'Don't hate the player, hate the club that's smashing your face!'
'I could go for a twirl. Whoa, whoa, whoa!'
'Power laning, power farming, power ganking, power kills! So many kills! Four-hundred kills!'
'Is that a rocket in your pocket?'
'Let's put on our thinking caps. Hmm... Ah, I got it!'
'So many noobs... will matchmaking ever find true balance?'
'No matter how far it is to the top, it's still withing my grasp!'
'Balance in all things.'
'Are you sure you're not in the wrong league?'
'You can't beat me, so join me. I need a good pair of legs.'
'Oh, what's that smell? Ah, it's me...'
'Let me help shuffle off your mortal coil.'
'Blindness is no impairment against a smelly enemy.'
'Imagine if I had a real weapon!'
'Hand bone connected to the axe bone connected to your face bone!'
'Shaken, not stirred.'
'For my next trick, I'll make you disappear.'
'No, really. Put that apple on your head.'
'Hmm, I suppose you're expecting an unbearable pun.'
'Sunder any army, crumble any mountain, leap the great — owwaww... My toesies.'
'Come on! Does this look dangerous to you?'

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Created Apr 18, 2012SourceReportNominate
Tags:champion, jokes, league, legend