| quote | show |
|---|
| ''Leave it to the gays to raise the only underachieving Asian in America.'' | |
| ''Cheerleading in my college was cool. The football players were so jealous they wouldn't even let me and my buddies go to their parties.' | |
| ''You know who has real conversations? Ants. They talk by vomiting chemicals in each other's mouths.'' | |
| ''If an accident does happen, I hope it kills me, because I don't think I would be a very inspiring disabled person'' | |
| ''One time my dad was struck by lightning. That's why he can drink as much as he wants.'' | |
| ''In what war is he a criminal? In the battle for our affections?'' | |
| ''A minute you're just friends watching Falcon Crest, and the next, you're lying underneath the air hockey table with your bra in your pocket!'' | |
| ''The real reason men fight is to release their pent-up gayness.'' | |
| ''You insult a woman's driving, and you use the air bunnies? I kill you.'' | |
| ''I'm going to attack you with this, and you defend yourself with respect'' | |
| ''That was hardly porn – it was a topless woman on a tractor. You know what they call that in Europe? A cereal commercial.'' | |
| ''My uncle was struck by lightning. You'd think it would give you superpowers, but now he just masturbates in movie theaters.'' | |
| '' I don't get how one dog keeps you awake when you grew sleeping through cockfights and revolutions' | |
| ''I text. LOL: laugh out loud, OMG: Oh, my god, WTF: Why the face?'' | |
| ''I hope you like getting balled!'' | |
| ''I can't think of anything more frightening than a half-Polish, half-Arab virgin in his thirties. One way or another, that ends with an explosion.'' | |
| ''Leave it to the gays to raise the only underachieving Asian in America.'' | |
| ''Cheerleading in my college was cool. The football players were so jealous they wouldn't even let me and my buddies go to their parties.' | |
| ''You know who has real conversations? Ants. They talk by vomiting chemicals in each other's mouths.'' | |
| ''If an accident does happen, I hope it kills me, because I don't think I would be a very inspiring disabled person'' | |
| ''One time my dad was struck by lightning. That's why he can drink as much as he wants.'' | |
| ''In what war is he a criminal? In the battle for our affections?'' | |
| ''A minute you're just friends watching Falcon Crest, and the next, you're lying underneath the air hockey table with your bra in your pocket!'' | |
| ''The real reason men fight is to release their pent-up gayness.'' | |
The Simpsons 
Fresh Prince of Bel Air 
Name That Sitcom
