Oscar Wilde or Frank Zappa

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Can you name the person who said each of these quotes?

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QuoteWilde/Zappa
I am not young enough to know everything
No good deed goes unpunished.
You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is the best.
I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.
Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.
The United States is a nation of laws, badly written and randomly enforced.
Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny.
Tobacco is my favorite vegetable.
QuoteWilde/Zappa
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it's going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it.
So many books, so little time.
I have nothing to declare except my genius.
A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.
I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there.
Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.
Take the Kama Sutra. How many people died from the Kama Sutra as opposed to the Bible? Who wins?
The books that the world calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame.
It's better to have something to remember than anything to regret.
My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.

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