| Quote | Character |
| At last! My arm is complete again! | |
| Oh, man. Midnight. Baseball bats and boogeymen. Beautiful. | |
| We're having too good a time today. We ain't thinking about tomorrow. | |
| A wedding? I love weddings. Drinks all around! | |
| You used to be much more...'muchier.' You've lost your muchness. | |
| I bet you can't get through breakfast without saying three words | |
| Good morning, starshine... the earth says hello! | |
| Young boys should never be sent to bed... they always wake up a day older. | |
| | Quote | Character |
| Look, there's two women f****** a polar bear! | |
| I'd be lying if I said I wasn't on the verge of doing snoopy dances. | |
| Life passes most people by while they're making grand plans for it. | |
| I know a boy whose name is Arnie... he's, uh, 'bout to turn 18 and have a big party. | |
| Really? Worst film you ever saw. Well, my next one will be better. | |
| Kevin, you wanna play scissors, paper, stone again? | |
| I've got a... I've got a dwarf, and I'm not afraid to use him! | |
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