| Quote | Movie |
| 'They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time' | |
| 'All right, you scumballs. You have a 30 minutes to hit the showers and get to class. Let's go! Move it! Move it! Move it!' | |
| 'Double turds.' | |
| 'Y'all ain't never got two things that match. Either y'all got Kool-aid, no sugar. Peanut butter, no jelly. Ham, no burger. Daaamn.' | |
| 'I'm not playing with you. I will blow that little black, gnarled crusty, dead motherf***** the f*** off your foot! Now put the razor away!' | |
| 'Ned, I would love to stay here and talk with you... but I'm not going to.' | |
| 'It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around here. I gotta send him back to the South Pole.' | |
| 'Well, you slime eating dogs! You scum sucking pigs! You sons of a motherless goat!' | |
| | Quote | Movie |
| 'Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?' | |
| 'I have nipples, Greg, could you milk me?' | |
| 'I can't hear you, you're trailing off and did I catch a niner in there? Were you calling from a walkie-talkie?' | |
| 'What the hell? Who's the dead man that hit me with the salt shaker?' | |
| 'Cool! You mean that I actually have frickin' sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their frickin' heads?' | |
| That's amazing. I've got the same combination on my luggage. | |
| 'Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with nail polish.' | |
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