| Quote | Episode | Speaker |
|---|
| Come on! Left hand, space bar, right hand, arrow keys. Gus, you should ask me a challenging question every once in a while, just for kicks | |
| Need I remind you, Mr. Spencer, what happens when you interfere with a police investigation? | |
| Shawn, I don't have a parrot. | |
| What kind of fire are we talking about? Michael Jackson in the Pepsi commercial fire or misusing the word 'literally' fire? | |
| Oh, no. I mean, how else could we have possibly known how angst-ridden you were? | |
| Yeah well, in a related issue, I'm blocking your number on all the phones in the office. | |
| We didn't do anything wrong. We didn't break any laws... Oh no. Oh no! What - what did you do, Shawn? | |
| My pilot's license? It's out back in the Cessna. Or perhaps you're referring to my license to kill. Revoked - problems at the Kazakhstan border. I'd give you the details, but then | |
| Lesson number three: Don't say 'please', don't say 'thank you', and definitely don't say 'hi'. Spirit squad auditions were over ten years ago. You're an authority figure. Act like | |
| ESPN, Gus. Channel 206. I'm begging you | |
| This is the part where you get blindsided with Plan B. It's kind of fun when it's not happening to me | |
| Tell me you're wearing that shirt because someone has to spot you from space. | |
| Did you break somebody's nose? | |
| | Quote | Episode | Speaker |
|---|
| A yellow fruit. Also, a kind of pudding. A delicious pudding. | |
| How do you just eat when there's a dead guy laying there? | |
| Well, I guess you just don't count the people who aren't going to get their lobster and sand dabs as victims. I'm surprised the Miami P.D. didn't fail you for lack of compassion. | |
| So you're stealing his clothes? He's not dead! | |
| I'm a taxpaying, voting citizen, therefore I have a right to speak to *any* elected official, such as the D.A., I please. | |
| Did he just say 'Absolutely' with a little half-smile? I'd like that printed out, please. I'm thinking of shellacking it on a nice piece of maple. | |
| I've got to get my hands on a gun, O'Hara. I have enemies everywhere. Maybe I can pick one up at the hotel. | |
| Now the guy with the gun is flipping me the bird. | |
| Shawn, I think I would know if I were a svengali. | |
| Wow. You just made THAT reference. | |
| You can't handle the truth! | |
| Of course I have the right address! It's the one you DIVINED!' | |
|
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