Which South Park Kid Did This?

Random Television or South Park Quiz

Can you name the name which of the four main South Park characters did this?

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ThingCharacter
Owned a theme park.
Was turned into one of the Crab People.
Joins an ancient society dedicated to guarding the secrets of Easter.
Has tea parties in his backyard dressed as Brittney Spears.
Was diagnosed with sex addiction.
Contracted AIDS and proceded to give it to one of his friends.
Goes on Maury as an out of control teenage girl.
Managed a peewee hockey team to the championships.
Gets a negroplasty in order to become a basketball.
Was put in an asylum for seeing talking feces.
Got a **** from his girlfriend behind a TGI Friday's.
Became the leader of Scientology.
Takes command of the Whale Wars team and attacks Japanese ships.
ThingCharacter
Becomes the leader of pirates in Somalia.
Becomes addicted to getting high off of cat urine.
Becomes the vigilante Mysterion, who constantly helps out South Park.
Got turned into a zombie, and proceded to start a pandemic.
Hits Butters in the face with a throwing star.
Persuades the people of South Park to buy hybrid cars.
Killed Jesus.
Gets thrown out of South Park for not voting in a school mascot election.
Becomes the king of the Sea People.
Lead Heaven to a victory against the armies of Hell.
Convinces the town to have faith in economy.
Got kidnapped by aliens multiple times.

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