100 Simpsons Quotes

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Can you name the character who said these quotes?

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QuoteCharacter
'You call this a bicameral legislature?'
'And now in the spirit of the season, start shopping.'
'Oh, we're going to be upstairs, making love...ly rope ladders in case of a fire.'
'Hey, we're just like the Waltons. We're praying for an end to the depression, too.'
'Please do not offer my god a peanut.'
'Your Honor, I call for a bad trial thingy.'
'Bingo? That's my favorite game! I just remember what to yell out when you win.'
'Boujooour, you cheese eating surrender monkeys!'
'If someone did eat Bart's shorts, they'd have a tummy full of pocket garbage.'
'That's Kabbala, jerk.'
'Homer, your theory of a donut shaped universe is intriguing. I may have to steal it for a while.'
'Hey Bart, you epidermis is showing!'
'I'm in no condition to drive. Wait! I shouldn't listen to myself. I'm drunk!'
'Boys don't have feelings, they have muscles!'
'Daddy.'
'Wow! I've never been called an adult before, but i've been tried as one.'
'All my friends are back in Phoenix and this town has a weird smell that all of you are probably used to.. but i'm not.'
'Prayer. The last refuge of a scoundrel.'
'I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman!'
'Those guys were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.'
'Ah, the joys of mortgaging your future.'
'Who'd thought a nuclear reactor would be so complicated?'
'Gambling is a victimless crime. The only victim is Moe.'
'We will not negotiate with terrorists. Is there a nearby city who will?'
'If you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.'
'If you ask me, Muhammad Ali, in his prime, was better than anti-lock brakes.'
'You sunk my scrabbleship!'
'We're not crying. We're vomiting through our eyes!'
'Grandma had hair like that before she went to sleep in her forever box.'
'Ah, God. He's my favorite fictional character.'
'They taste like burning...'
'I love children, particularly their young supple organs.'
'I got sprayed by a skunk. Let me rub it off on your sweaters.'
'I think it was when that cold snap killed off all the hobos.'
QuoteCharacter
'I am the Lizard Queen!'
'Um, excuse me, sir. I already know how not to hit a guy. Can we break out the nunchuks?'
'There's nothing like an unfurnished basement for maximum comfort.'
'Oh, a sarcasm detector. That's a REALLY useful invention.'
'I only call you skum compared to Krusty.'
'I'll be bringin' spark plugs to chuck at people I don't like. Like you!'
'Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins the movie by telling you how it ends.'
'Uh, hey everybody! I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.'
'Bart, don't use the Touch of Death on your sister.'
'Oh, boy. Looks like suicide again for me.'
'Don't make me run. I'm full of chocolate!'
'Enclosed is a photo of us on a bike. I forget which one I am.'
'Homer, I think you've got the gun set on '****'.'
'We don't believe fur is murder, but paying for it sure is.'
'Homer, a gun's not a toy. It's for protection or shooting dangerous or delicious animals.'
'I'm Santa? Oh, now i'll never die.'
'We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.'
'You remind me of the monkey man who killed my father's chickens.'
'my eye! I'm not supposed to get jigs in it!'
'A woman doctor? Now I've seen everything.'
'I don't get mad. I get stabby.'
'I don't think real checks have exclamation points.'
'I demand to speak to my paleontologist.'
'This country is so historic. For all we know, Jesus could've given a talk in Conference Room C!'
'Hey, if you're getting loaded off those fumes, I'm gonna have to charge you.'
'I've come to hate my own creation. Now I know how God feels.'
'Did you have the same backwards-talking dream with the flaming cards?'
'Sir, I got carsick in your office.'
'You gotta nuke somethin'
'I'll be dead in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missour-ah!'
'Miss Simpson, do you find anything funny about the word 'tromboner'?'
'Our lyrics are like our children, man. No way.'
'It's not enough to want the cracker. You have to earn it.'
'Fire can be our friend, whether its toasting marshmallows or raining down on Charlie.'
QuoteCharacter
'Who would've guessed reading and writing would pay off?'
'How can I prove that we're live? Penis.'
'I played hardball with Hollywood, the closest I will ever come to playing a sport in my life!'
'Think of it as a wake up call from a man with nothin' but a blow-up doll. And even she left me. Should not have used helium.'
'What kind of 10 year old boy has a tea set?'
'Bubbles, it's gonna be a long night.'
'I wished we lived in a place like the America of yesteryear that exists only in the mind of us Republicans.'
'Hamlet is not only a great play but it also became a great movie, called 'Ghostbusters'.'
'If this is anyone other than Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit!'
'It's BTO. They're Canada's answer to ELP. Their biggest hit was TCB.'
'I'm not popular enough to be different!'
'Now I have to go home and make sure my pool boy is using his SKIMMER!'
'Oh my god! Somebody's taken a bite of the big Rice Krispie square! Oh yeah, and the waiter's been brutally beaten.'
'I'm in love... no,wait. It's a stroke.'
'If anyone asks, you were at the flower shop.'
'Book stores don't have answers, they just have creepy guys sitting in easy chairs at the end of hallways.'
'I believe Freddy Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel.'
'My theory is-Skinner likes dog food.'
'There's no shame in being a pariah.'
'Is it a crime to want nice things and then steal them from a public museum where any gum-chewing monkey in a Tufts University jacket can gawk at them? I think not.'
'I don't want my last words to him to be 'cut your toenails, they look like Fritos'.'
'Silly customer. You cannot kill a Twinkie.'
'Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, and idiot, a pig, and a communist, but he is not a porn star!'
'Oh, stupid movies. Who invented these dumb things, anyway?'
'I think we'd all be better off if every country had its own planet.'
'Ahh, if it isn't my friend Mr. Mcgregg, with a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg.'
'Hello, St. Louis!!'
'Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all! Nothing at all! Nothing at all!'
'I'm a furniture!'
'You, sir, are an idiot.'
'Well, he's kind of had it in for me since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace the word 'accidentally' with 'repeatedly', and the word 'dog' with 'son'.
'This place is nothing like Animal House! I smashed a beatnik's guitar and he sued me for damages!.'

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