100 Simpsons Quotes

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Can you name the character who said these quotes?

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QuoteCharacter
'Wow! I've never been called an adult before, but i've been tried as one.'
'You gotta nuke somethin'
'I'm not popular enough to be different!'
'Gambling is a victimless crime. The only victim is Moe.'
'Daddy.'
'There's no shame in being a pariah.'
'Bart, don't use the Touch of Death on your sister.'
'All my friends are back in Phoenix and this town has a weird smell that all of you are probably used to.. but i'm not.'
'I demand to speak to my paleontologist.'
'I've come to hate my own creation. Now I know how God feels.'
'If someone did eat Bart's shorts, they'd have a tummy full of pocket garbage.'
'Homer, I think you've got the gun set on '****'.'
'We're not crying. We're vomiting through our eyes!'
'You call this a bicameral legislature?'
'Fire can be our friend, whether its toasting marshmallows or raining down on Charlie.'
'I believe Freddy Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel.'
'I don't want my last words to him to be 'cut your toenails, they look like Fritos'.'
'Boujooour, you cheese eating surrender monkeys!'
'Don't make me run. I'm full of chocolate!'
'I'm a furniture!'
'Ahh, if it isn't my friend Mr. Mcgregg, with a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg.'
'Your Honor, I call for a bad trial thingy.'
'Bubbles, it's gonna be a long night.'
'You sunk my scrabbleship!'
'I'm in love... no,wait. It's a stroke.'
'That's Kabbala, jerk.'
'Homer, your theory of a donut shaped universe is intriguing. I may have to steal it for a while.'
'And now in the spirit of the season, start shopping.'
'Did you have the same backwards-talking dream with the flaming cards?'
'It's BTO. They're Canada's answer to ELP. Their biggest hit was TCB.'
'I'm Santa? Oh, now i'll never die.'
'Oh my god! Somebody's taken a bite of the big Rice Krispie square! Oh yeah, and the waiter's been brutally beaten.'
'This country is so historic. For all we know, Jesus could've given a talk in Conference Room C!'
'I love children, particularly their young supple organs.'
QuoteCharacter
'my eye! I'm not supposed to get jigs in it!'
'Boys don't have feelings, they have muscles!'
'I don't think real checks have exclamation points.'
'Oh, stupid movies. Who invented these dumb things, anyway?'
'They taste like burning...'
'Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins the movie by telling you how it ends.'
'Enclosed is a photo of us on a bike. I forget which one I am.'
'I only call you skum compared to Krusty.'
'Now I have to go home and make sure my pool boy is using his SKIMMER!'
'Hey, if you're getting loaded off those fumes, I'm gonna have to charge you.'
'I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman!'
'What kind of 10 year old boy has a tea set?'
'I wished we lived in a place like the America of yesteryear that exists only in the mind of us Republicans.'
'Prayer. The last refuge of a scoundrel.'
'Think of it as a wake up call from a man with nothin' but a blow-up doll. And even she left me. Should not have used helium.'
'I don't get mad. I get stabby.'
'Well, he's kind of had it in for me since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace the word 'accidentally' with 'repeatedly', and the word 'dog' with 'son'.
'I am the Lizard Queen!'
'It's not enough to want the cracker. You have to earn it.'
'Please do not offer my god a peanut.'
'I got sprayed by a skunk. Let me rub it off on your sweaters.'
'Uh, hey everybody! I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.'
'Um, excuse me, sir. I already know how not to hit a guy. Can we break out the nunchuks?'
'Hello, St. Louis!!'
'I'll be bringin' spark plugs to chuck at people I don't like. Like you!'
'I think it was when that cold snap killed off all the hobos.'
'Sir, I got carsick in your office.'
'I played hardball with Hollywood, the closest I will ever come to playing a sport in my life!'
'Oh, boy. Looks like suicide again for me.'
'If you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.'
'Hamlet is not only a great play but it also became a great movie, called 'Ghostbusters'.'
'Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, and idiot, a pig, and a communist, but he is not a porn star!'
'Those guys were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.'
'Book stores don't have answers, they just have creepy guys sitting in easy chairs at the end of hallways.'
QuoteCharacter
'Ah, the joys of mortgaging your future.'
'If you ask me, Muhammad Ali, in his prime, was better than anti-lock brakes.'
'We don't believe fur is murder, but paying for it sure is.'
'Homer, a gun's not a toy. It's for protection or shooting dangerous or delicious animals.'
'Hey Bart, you epidermis is showing!'
'How can I prove that we're live? Penis.'
'This place is nothing like Animal House! I smashed a beatnik's guitar and he sued me for damages!.'
'Our lyrics are like our children, man. No way.'
'Oh, a sarcasm detector. That's a REALLY useful invention.'
'Miss Simpson, do you find anything funny about the word 'tromboner'?'
'Who would've guessed reading and writing would pay off?'
'A woman doctor? Now I've seen everything.'
'Grandma had hair like that before she went to sleep in her forever box.'
'Who'd thought a nuclear reactor would be so complicated?'
'You remind me of the monkey man who killed my father's chickens.'
'I'm in no condition to drive. Wait! I shouldn't listen to myself. I'm drunk!'
'I'll be dead in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missour-ah!'
'I think we'd all be better off if every country had its own planet.'
'There's nothing like an unfurnished basement for maximum comfort.'
'If anyone asks, you were at the flower shop.'
'Ah, God. He's my favorite fictional character.'
'Bingo? That's my favorite game! I just remember what to yell out when you win.'
'Silly customer. You cannot kill a Twinkie.'
'We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.'
'Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all! Nothing at all! Nothing at all!'
'Hey, we're just like the Waltons. We're praying for an end to the depression, too.'
'Is it a crime to want nice things and then steal them from a public museum where any gum-chewing monkey in a Tufts University jacket can gawk at them? I think not.'
'If this is anyone other than Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit!'
'You, sir, are an idiot.'
'Oh, we're going to be upstairs, making love...ly rope ladders in case of a fire.'
'We will not negotiate with terrorists. Is there a nearby city who will?'
'My theory is-Skinner likes dog food.'

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