100 Simpsons Quotes

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Can you name the character who said these quotes?

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'Did you have the same backwards-talking dream with the flaming cards?'
'Don't make me run. I'm full of chocolate!'
'Hello, St. Louis!!'
'Boujooour, you cheese eating surrender monkeys!'
'Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins the movie by telling you how it ends.'
'If you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.'
'This country is so historic. For all we know, Jesus could've given a talk in Conference Room C!'
'I only call you skum compared to Krusty.'
'Ahh, if it isn't my friend Mr. Mcgregg, with a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg.'
'Think of it as a wake up call from a man with nothin' but a blow-up doll. And even she left me. Should not have used helium.'
'Gambling is a victimless crime. The only victim is Moe.'
'I am the Lizard Queen!'
'There's no shame in being a pariah.'
'A woman doctor? Now I've seen everything.'
'Silly customer. You cannot kill a Twinkie.'
'Boys don't have feelings, they have muscles!'
'It's BTO. They're Canada's answer to ELP. Their biggest hit was TCB.'
'Prayer. The last refuge of a scoundrel.'
'Hamlet is not only a great play but it also became a great movie, called 'Ghostbusters'.'
'Um, excuse me, sir. I already know how not to hit a guy. Can we break out the nunchuks?'
'Hey, if you're getting loaded off those fumes, I'm gonna have to charge you.'
'I'm in love... no,wait. It's a stroke.'
'We don't believe fur is murder, but paying for it sure is.'
'Bart, don't use the Touch of Death on your sister.'
'You, sir, are an idiot.'
'I love children, particularly their young supple organs.'
'Ah, God. He's my favorite fictional character.'
'I demand to speak to my paleontologist.'
'I don't want my last words to him to be 'cut your toenails, they look like Fritos'.'
'If you ask me, Muhammad Ali, in his prime, was better than anti-lock brakes.'
'If someone did eat Bart's shorts, they'd have a tummy full of pocket garbage.'
'Fire can be our friend, whether its toasting marshmallows or raining down on Charlie.'
'Enclosed is a photo of us on a bike. I forget which one I am.'
'Your Honor, I call for a bad trial thingy.'
'What kind of 10 year old boy has a tea set?'
'I'm Santa? Oh, now i'll never die.'
'my eye! I'm not supposed to get jigs in it!'
'Sir, I got carsick in your office.'
'Now I have to go home and make sure my pool boy is using his SKIMMER!'
'Homer, a gun's not a toy. It's for protection or shooting dangerous or delicious animals.'
'It's not enough to want the cracker. You have to earn it.'
'Uh, hey everybody! I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.'
'Oh, we're going to be upstairs, making love...ly rope ladders in case of a fire.'
'Hey, we're just like the Waltons. We're praying for an end to the depression, too.'
'Oh, a sarcasm detector. That's a REALLY useful invention.'
'Homer, your theory of a donut shaped universe is intriguing. I may have to steal it for a while.'
'Who would've guessed reading and writing would pay off?'
'Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all! Nothing at all! Nothing at all!'
'How can I prove that we're live? Penis.'
'All my friends are back in Phoenix and this town has a weird smell that all of you are probably used to.. but i'm not.'
'Oh, stupid movies. Who invented these dumb things, anyway?'
'Oh my god! Somebody's taken a bite of the big Rice Krispie square! Oh yeah, and the waiter's been brutally beaten.'
'They taste like burning...'
'Oh, boy. Looks like suicide again for me.'
'Well, he's kind of had it in for me since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace the word 'accidentally' with 'repeatedly', and the word 'dog' with 'son'.
'Our lyrics are like our children, man. No way.'
'Please do not offer my god a peanut.'
'Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, and idiot, a pig, and a communist, but he is not a porn star!'
'You call this a bicameral legislature?'
'I don't think real checks have exclamation points.'
'Grandma had hair like that before she went to sleep in her forever box.'
'Wow! I've never been called an adult before, but i've been tried as one.'
'I'm in no condition to drive. Wait! I shouldn't listen to myself. I'm drunk!'
'I don't get mad. I get stabby.'
'You remind me of the monkey man who killed my father's chickens.'
'And now in the spirit of the season, start shopping.'
'Is it a crime to want nice things and then steal them from a public museum where any gum-chewing monkey in a Tufts University jacket can gawk at them? I think not.'
'I wished we lived in a place like the America of yesteryear that exists only in the mind of us Republicans.'
'I think we'd all be better off if every country had its own planet.'
'I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman!'
'I believe Freddy Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel.'
'I got sprayed by a skunk. Let me rub it off on your sweaters.'
'Homer, I think you've got the gun set on '****'.'
'I think it was when that cold snap killed off all the hobos.'
'We will not negotiate with terrorists. Is there a nearby city who will?'
'I'll be bringin' spark plugs to chuck at people I don't like. Like you!'
'Bubbles, it's gonna be a long night.'
'Who'd thought a nuclear reactor would be so complicated?'
'Those guys were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.'
'I've come to hate my own creation. Now I know how God feels.'
'Hey Bart, you epidermis is showing!'
'My theory is-Skinner likes dog food.'
'I played hardball with Hollywood, the closest I will ever come to playing a sport in my life!'
'Book stores don't have answers, they just have creepy guys sitting in easy chairs at the end of hallways.'
'I'm a furniture!'
'There's nothing like an unfurnished basement for maximum comfort.'
'Bingo? That's my favorite game! I just remember what to yell out when you win.'
'That's Kabbala, jerk.'
'I'm not popular enough to be different!'
'You sunk my scrabbleship!'
'We're not crying. We're vomiting through our eyes!'
'Ah, the joys of mortgaging your future.'
'You gotta nuke somethin'
'If anyone asks, you were at the flower shop.'
'We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.'
'If this is anyone other than Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit!'
'I'll be dead in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missour-ah!'
'Miss Simpson, do you find anything funny about the word 'tromboner'?'
'This place is nothing like Animal House! I smashed a beatnik's guitar and he sued me for damages!.'

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