100 Simpsons Quotes

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Can you name the character who said these quotes?

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QuoteCharacter
'Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all! Nothing at all! Nothing at all!'
'Ah, the joys of mortgaging your future.'
'I got sprayed by a skunk. Let me rub it off on your sweaters.'
'We will not negotiate with terrorists. Is there a nearby city who will?'
'Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins the movie by telling you how it ends.'
'If anyone asks, you were at the flower shop.'
'I love children, particularly their young supple organs.'
'I'm a furniture!'
'Think of it as a wake up call from a man with nothin' but a blow-up doll. And even she left me. Should not have used helium.'
'Homer, a gun's not a toy. It's for protection or shooting dangerous or delicious animals.'
'Our lyrics are like our children, man. No way.'
'I'm in love... no,wait. It's a stroke.'
'Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, and idiot, a pig, and a communist, but he is not a porn star!'
'Hey Bart, you epidermis is showing!'
'This place is nothing like Animal House! I smashed a beatnik's guitar and he sued me for damages!.'
'A woman doctor? Now I've seen everything.'
'You gotta nuke somethin'
'There's no shame in being a pariah.'
'Hey, if you're getting loaded off those fumes, I'm gonna have to charge you.'
'Wow! I've never been called an adult before, but i've been tried as one.'
'I've come to hate my own creation. Now I know how God feels.'
'Bubbles, it's gonna be a long night.'
'If this is anyone other than Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit!'
'Oh, boy. Looks like suicide again for me.'
'Oh, stupid movies. Who invented these dumb things, anyway?'
'Hey, we're just like the Waltons. We're praying for an end to the depression, too.'
'I'm Santa? Oh, now i'll never die.'
'You sunk my scrabbleship!'
'I don't think real checks have exclamation points.'
'If you ask me, Muhammad Ali, in his prime, was better than anti-lock brakes.'
'That's Kabbala, jerk.'
'I only call you skum compared to Krusty.'
'I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman!'
'I'm not popular enough to be different!'
QuoteCharacter
'Who would've guessed reading and writing would pay off?'
'Your Honor, I call for a bad trial thingy.'
'All my friends are back in Phoenix and this town has a weird smell that all of you are probably used to.. but i'm not.'
'Uh, hey everybody! I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.'
'Those guys were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.'
'Did you have the same backwards-talking dream with the flaming cards?'
'Grandma had hair like that before she went to sleep in her forever box.'
'How can I prove that we're live? Penis.'
'Daddy.'
'You remind me of the monkey man who killed my father's chickens.'
'Bart, don't use the Touch of Death on your sister.'
'Who'd thought a nuclear reactor would be so complicated?'
'And now in the spirit of the season, start shopping.'
'I'm in no condition to drive. Wait! I shouldn't listen to myself. I'm drunk!'
'If someone did eat Bart's shorts, they'd have a tummy full of pocket garbage.'
'Gambling is a victimless crime. The only victim is Moe.'
'If you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.'
'It's BTO. They're Canada's answer to ELP. Their biggest hit was TCB.'
'Is it a crime to want nice things and then steal them from a public museum where any gum-chewing monkey in a Tufts University jacket can gawk at them? I think not.'
'Book stores don't have answers, they just have creepy guys sitting in easy chairs at the end of hallways.'
'Boys don't have feelings, they have muscles!'
'It's not enough to want the cracker. You have to earn it.'
'I think it was when that cold snap killed off all the hobos.'
'I wished we lived in a place like the America of yesteryear that exists only in the mind of us Republicans.'
'This country is so historic. For all we know, Jesus could've given a talk in Conference Room C!'
'We're not crying. We're vomiting through our eyes!'
'Boujooour, you cheese eating surrender monkeys!'
'Sir, I got carsick in your office.'
'Enclosed is a photo of us on a bike. I forget which one I am.'
'I demand to speak to my paleontologist.'
'Well, he's kind of had it in for me since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace the word 'accidentally' with 'repeatedly', and the word 'dog' with 'son'.
'I think we'd all be better off if every country had its own planet.'
'I believe Freddy Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel.'
'I don't want my last words to him to be 'cut your toenails, they look like Fritos'.'
QuoteCharacter
'I'll be bringin' spark plugs to chuck at people I don't like. Like you!'
'Prayer. The last refuge of a scoundrel.'
'Hello, St. Louis!!'
'Oh my god! Somebody's taken a bite of the big Rice Krispie square! Oh yeah, and the waiter's been brutally beaten.'
'They taste like burning...'
'Don't make me run. I'm full of chocolate!'
'Now I have to go home and make sure my pool boy is using his SKIMMER!'
'You call this a bicameral legislature?'
'I am the Lizard Queen!'
'Silly customer. You cannot kill a Twinkie.'
'Hamlet is not only a great play but it also became a great movie, called 'Ghostbusters'.'
'Oh, we're going to be upstairs, making love...ly rope ladders in case of a fire.'
'My theory is-Skinner likes dog food.'
'Um, excuse me, sir. I already know how not to hit a guy. Can we break out the nunchuks?'
'What kind of 10 year old boy has a tea set?'
'Bingo? That's my favorite game! I just remember what to yell out when you win.'
'Oh, a sarcasm detector. That's a REALLY useful invention.'
'Ah, God. He's my favorite fictional character.'
'Homer, I think you've got the gun set on '****'.'
'Homer, your theory of a donut shaped universe is intriguing. I may have to steal it for a while.'
'We don't believe fur is murder, but paying for it sure is.'
'I played hardball with Hollywood, the closest I will ever come to playing a sport in my life!'
'Miss Simpson, do you find anything funny about the word 'tromboner'?'
'We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.'
'Fire can be our friend, whether its toasting marshmallows or raining down on Charlie.'
'Ahh, if it isn't my friend Mr. Mcgregg, with a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg.'
'I don't get mad. I get stabby.'
'I'll be dead in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missour-ah!'
'There's nothing like an unfurnished basement for maximum comfort.'
'You, sir, are an idiot.'
'my eye! I'm not supposed to get jigs in it!'
'Please do not offer my god a peanut.'

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