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Louis C.K. Follow that Line
Can you pick the endings to the jokes of comedian Louis C.K.?
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If you're not familiar with Louis C.K.'s comedy, please don't get mad at me about offensive jokes. I tried to keep this as clean as possible with the language, which was tough with a comedian like C.K
When girls go wild, they show their t*ts. When women go wild
I don't have a gun, but if I did, I would shoot a baby deer in the mouth
The meal is not over when I'm full. The meal is over when
I'm a white man! You can't even hurt my feelings. What can you call a white man that really digs deep? 'Hey, cracker!'
Most people are dead. Hitler. Ray Charles. Some other guys,
My body has no sexual meaning anymore, so if I can make people laugh with it,
There are two types of people in this world. People who say they pee in the shower, and
That's what optimistic means, you know?
I'm not saying that white people are better.
Well, my wife assassinated my sexual identity
I've started to kind of hate people. It's not like I have anything against them.
She's five, five years old. You know what that means?
Divorce is forever, it really truly is.
People like to say things like,'There's someone for everyone.'
They had a huge barrel of duck vaginas with a scoop stuck in it.
I used to look at a hot girl at a bar and think, 'Wow, she's an angel, what could I ever say to make her like me?'
'I'm bored' is a useless thing to say.
You'll be dead for way longer than you're alive, like, that's mostly what you're ever gonna be.
Do you think sharks would be embarrassed
My friend said to me, 'You just littered. Don't you care about the environment?' And I thought about it and I said, 'This isn't the environment.'
Twitter and Facebook and Myspace; all that stuff makes you warped.
(His daughter's joke:) Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet?
Parents have to say stuff like, 'I couldn't even imagine my life without my children.' I can totally imagine my life without my children.
How do you take a miserable person with no control over their lives and tell them with a straight face:
Whenever you leave behind failure, that means you're doing better. If you think everything you've done has been great,
So my kids get in a cab and they just hurdle through space at a speed determined by the profit motive of a exhausted man from another country where life is sh*t cheap,
Black people also need to understand that white people have also had bad things happen to us. For example,
I know it's not popular to say, but
Huckleberry Finn is
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