Famous sports rants in reverse

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Can you name the Famous sports rants in reverse?

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''Sure, you can call me Chris instead of Jim. I don't mind.''
''You play to lose the game!''
''Game faces? Nah, never heard of them. I won't even waste the time of attempting to make one on this stage.''
''The Bears?! Man, we have absolutely no clue who they are. I guess they are going to have to stay on that hook up there.''
''Tony Romo is such a loser. I didn't even know he was on my team. Please criticize him all you want, it's definitely justified.''
''I am the worst of all time. I'm slow like a snail, and weigh like a dump truck.''
''I'm 14! I'm only a child! Please leave me alone. However, I do love the newspaper, it's very accurate.''
''Lennox Lewis is a wonderful boxer. I wish him, and his children a happy and fulfilling future!''
''You guys ask the best questions ever. Please ask more, I could never get tired of them!''
''Practice? Oh man, I love practice we can talk about it all day! It's such an excellent way to lead teammates by example!''
''I love getting outrebounded. Seriously.''
''Kobe was my favorite teammate. I'd never ask him the flavor of my body parts'
''Steroids? Hell yeah, I took them! Honestly!''
''The next time I see you, I'll just invite you for a cup of tea, and not harm you at all!''
''You are without a doubt the most unattractive sideline reporter I've seen. Because of this, I will not make unwarranted sexual advances towards you. And yes, I am totally sober.'
''Why yes, you are correct I did commit a foot fault. Therefore, I will not wish you bodily harm with this very tennis ball.''
''That was the best performance I've ever seen. Playoffs? Not only will we make them, but we are going to win the next game!''
''You definitely made the right call. I can tell by the seriousness of your tone.''

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