| Quote | Character |
|---|
| 'By the way, Hayley, oh my God, these Chocodiles, these Chocodiles, Hayley, oh my God, these Chocodiles, oh my God!' | |
| 'It's times like this that I wish I had a wife. So, I could turn to her and say 'Stop eating that bread, you fat pig, look at your thighs, you disgust me.' | |
| 'Good call, babe. You can do better.' | |
| 'Our top story, a car was broken into Cherry Street this afternoon. My car. The suspect was six-foot two and a bastard!' | |
| 'Okay, people, again, the curare darts are not toys. They're for temporarily paralyzing your enemies...or just chilling out to some Zeppelin.' | |
| 'Roger? Whoah! Is this one of those Twilight Zone phones where I can talk to the dead, but only with horrible, ironic consequences?' | |
| 'A cult of muderous housewives. Before 9/11, I wouldn't have believed it, or at least I'd ask you some follow-up questions. But that's just not the world we live in anymore.' | |
| 'It's the cops! Quick, flush me down the toilet!' | |
| 'Look, Mr. Smith, your stress zits are going away. Yay!' | |
| 'Hello. Are you from a religion? Because we're happy with the God we have now.' | |
| | Quote | Character |
|---|
| 'Clooney, you smug bastard. Stop playing basketball and get married like the rest of us. ' | |
| 'Once again, C.I.A. body-doubles are for work purposes ONLY, people. Using your double to finish making love to a Jet Blue stewardess - because you were too drunk - is a definite n | |
| 'I touched her hand... her hand touched her boob. By the transitive property, I got some boob! Algebra's awesome!' | |
| 'Let's see, how do I hang an air freshener on this? You are a total waste of space. I often dream of killing you. (inhales) Ah, Mountain Pine.' | |
| 'Why can't you take a page from that bitch Hillary Clinton and let it go?' | |
| ' I'm not ready for Steve to make the change. He's gonna have man breath, and his poops won't smell good anymore.' | |
| 'Oh, I've got claws. Look how fat you are. See? Kitty can scratch.' | |
| 'Okay. I'm cool. Whatever life throws at me, I can take it, because I am a strong, independant, black woman... I mean, white teenager. Oh God, I'm gonna die out here!' | |
| 'I have to hold on to this bag of cat food, or I might float away.' | |
| 'Hawaii?! Thats where Japan goes to play golf!' | |
|
Seinfeld Characters
Tearjerker Disney Quotes
Title Drops
