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Useless Movie Morals
Can you name each film from an overly specific moral you learn from it?
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Being able to talk well is important if you're a famous public figure.
If at first you do succeed at tracking down your wife's murderer, try, try, try again.
Don't trust an ex-Nazi with a nuclear bomb.
The best advice comes from hornbills and mandrills.
We must stop developing voice command technology before it's too late.
It's better to be a gangster pretending to be a cop than a cop pretending to be a gangster.
If a woman dresses revealingly and makes a living on her own, her daughter will fall off a pony.
When you find a giant unidentified creature in a haunted forest, give it a hug.
Deputy police chiefs are wrong about everything.
The road to success is paved with ping pong and shrimp.
If you think someone might be taking over your anti-materialist organization, it's probably just you.
Mentally unstable ballerinas should avoid lesbian experiences with dangerous doppëlgangers.
If you're well-endowed, you'll be better off in the porn industry than selling baking soda as cocaine.
He who tries to have sex with a cheerleader, gets shot by a homophobe.
Have lots of random life experiences before going on a game show.
Never order fish for your in-flight dinner.
If a jury is divided 11-1, the one juror is probably right.
The best way to get over an ex-girlfriend is to write a musical about Dracula.
The only problem with dating your computer is it might break up with you.
Anyone from any background can be a successful artist, even a rodent.
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