| Alter Ego | Name |
| Whipped 'Poundsaver' Cripple | |
| The only girl I've ever got with is Elliot Ball's sister | |
| Chairman Mao | |
| 'Yeah me and all my Grantham mates...' YOU HAVE NONE. | |
| I need drugs to have a good time | |
| Can you speak up please? | |
| People mistake my superior intellect for patronising comments. | |
| | Alter Ego | Name |
| I just knew | |
| Former failed British Number 1 | |
| Token | |
| 'How many different women can I get with and still keep my girlfriend?' ; ] | |
| Glib Glob Dibalob Flibalobadibadob | |
| I'd like some tea please. And cake | |
| I wish this quiz applied for me | |
|