| Quote | Movie | Character |
| 'Mushu, you hungry?' | |
| 'Wipe yourself off, you dead.' | |
| 'Maybe we should put on a dirty movie. Only $9.95!' | |
| 'We can hang in my crib. I will show you my hood.' | |
| 'All right, listen up! All the Triads and the ugly women on this side, and all the fine women on this side, right now!' | |
| 'I don't like my chickens alive. I like em dead and deep fried. You ever heard of Popeyes?' | |
| 'Fifty million dollars? Man, who do you think you kidnapped? Chelsea Clinton? ' | |
| 'You lucky we're not in Hong Kong. Phone book twice as big.' | |
| 'Look at this. That's cigaweed!' | |
| 'You are a civilian. In Hong Kong, I'm Michael Jackson, you are Toto.' | |
| | Quote | Movie | Character |
| 'If you're half Chinese, I'm half black. I'm your brother and I'm fly. You down with that, Snoopy? That's dope, innit?' | |
| 'San Juan! I've been there many times on my private plane. You must know my good friend Pedro Morales Magonzales Morotto Malosso Megusto. | |
| 'It is not my job to be jumping on and off of buses, I don't do that, I am not Carl Lewis!' | |
| 'You know, we could have been a good couple. We could have had something special. But you one crazy-ass bitch!' | |
| 'Every garden I'm nervous!' | |
| 'Come on Crouching Tiger. Don't hide that dragon!' | |
| 'You told everyone to take out their Samurai swords and shave your butt.' | |
| 'See, how difficult is that? My English? He even cannot say 3 words.' | |
| 'No wonder Lance Armstrong came all the way here to ride a bike!' | |
| 'What's wrong with you man? You never step in front of a black man at a buffet line.' | |
|