| Quote | Character |
|---|
| 'You can't fire me. I make your decisions and I say, 'I'm not fired.' Ha.' | |
| 'Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman. And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition.' | |
| 'If she wanted to be more like me, why couldn't she just copy my hairstyle or something?' | |
| 'Hey, if we were in prison, you guys would be like my bitches. ' | |
| 'All right, I took the quiz, and it turns out, I do put career before men.' | |
| 'Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man. Just stop calling. ' | |
| 'Hey you know what I just realized?, Joker is Poker with a J! — Coincidence?' | |
| 'I don't want my baby's first words to be 'How You Doing' ' | |
| 'You know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half *pure evil*! ' | |
| 'Wow. This is the first time I've walked down the aisle without the possibility of it ending in divorce.' | |
| 'They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my father, I got great boots boots!' | |
| 'All right, look if you absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for. ' | |
| 'If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.' | |
| 'All right, look if you absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for. ' | |
| 'Hey, if we were in prison, you guys would be like my bitches. ' | |
| 'Is it me? Is it like I have a beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear? ' | |
| 'All right, I took the quiz, and it turns out, I do put career before men.' | |
| 'You know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half *pure evil*! ' | |
| 'I hate his underwear. One time I bought a pair marked XS and let me tell you there's no room for anything excess in there. ' | |
| 'I don't want my baby's first words to be 'How You Doing' ' | |
| 'Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man. Just stop calling. ' | |
| 'Ew, ew, ew, ew ew ew ew ew. Ugly Naked Guy got a Thighmaster. ' | |
| 'I can't believe my dad saw us having sex. He didn't make it to one of my piano recitals, but this he sees. ' | |
| 'I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? ' | |
| 'Who's FICA? Why is he getting all my money? ' | |
| 'They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my father, I got great boots boots!' | |
| 'Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman. And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition.' | |
| 'Come on Ross, you're a paleontologist, dig a little deeper.' | |
| 'You can't fire me. I make your decisions and I say, 'I'm not fired.' Ha.' | |
| 'Whoa. Where you going in those pants? 1982?' | |
| 'If she wanted to be more like me, why couldn't she just copy my hairstyle or something?' | |
| 'Wow. This is the first time I've walked down the aisle without the possibility of it ending in divorce.' | |
| 'Wasn't it supposed to be just a fling, huh? Shouldn't it be... flung by now?' | |
| 'You're over me? When were you... under me?' | |
| 'Hey you know what I just realized?, Joker is Poker with a J! — Coincidence?' | |
| 'Look at me! I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes?!' | |
'Friends' Characters by First/Last Line
Quotable 'Friends'
Title Drops
