| Character Description | Actor | Character and Movie |
| I drove across the country with my best friend to deliver a briefcase to someone I had never seen. | |
| I worked on the docks during The Great Depression, until I made my comeback in professional boxing | |
| I saved a bus full of people from being blown up by a mad man. Then I took his head off on top of a train. | |
| I solved the murders of many mob members in South Boston. I didn't turn the brothers at fault in though. | |
| I seduced the headmaster's daughter and am in love with my step-sister | |
| I'm a wrestler stuck in detention | |
| I taught celebrities how to play cards before robbing 3 casinos | |
| I fell in love with Natalie Portman when I came home for my mother's funeral | |
| I traveled across the US searching for twinkies. On my way I killed a few zombies. | |
| I was the biggest cocaine dealer in the US before my partner betrayed me and Penelope Cruz divorced me | |