Why's he calling me meat?

Bad trades are part of baseball

Dont try to strike everybody out! Strikeouts are boring!

Don't hold the ball so hard, Okay?

I held it like an egg

That sucker teed off on it like he knew I was gonna throw a fastball -He did know -How?

You cant ban me from the ballpark cause my daddy donated the scoreboard

-He walked 18! - new league record -Struck out 18! -Another league record

Hit me in the chest with that. -I'd kill you

Who's this? Who are you?

You hit white balls for batting practice. The ballparks are like cathedrals. The hotels all have room service

That's good, when you get in a fight with a drunk, don't hit him with your pitching hand

You just got lesson number one.

Last chance, your place or mine?

So is somebody going to bed with somebody or what?

I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone

Well, he called it the Bermuda Triangle

How was Ebby Calvin LaLoosh?

Yeah, you said Crash!

Man, that ball got outta here in a hurry

I quit, all right! I f***ing quit!

Aren't I pretty?

Cute? Baby ducks are cute. I hate cute!

How come you don't like me?

You got a gift

Christ, you dont need a quadrophonic Blaupunkt!

Have you heard of Walt Whitman?

I've never seen crash so angry! And frankly sports fans, he used a word that's a no-no with umpires.

He's just your father, man

Eight......and Sixteen

I wouldn't dig in if I was you

This son of a b**** is throwing a two hit shutout, and he shakes me off. You believe that s***? Charlie, here comes the deuce

Show us that million dollar arm

Right, fear and ignorance

Excuse me, but what the hell is going on out here?

We're dealing with a lot of s***!

Come on Annie, think of something clever to say, huh? Something full of magic, religion, bulls***. Come on, dazzle me

What are you doing standing here? I gave you a gift.