| Quote | Character |
|---|
| Love isn't something you feel, it's something you do. If the person you're with doesn't want it, do yourself a favor and save it for someone who does. | |
| I wouldn't change anything. If you change one thing, that changes everything and some things are the way they are supposed to be. | |
| Well,isn't it comforting to know that being miserable is still better than being an idiot. | |
| Ok, If you were a gay motician, what would you want for Christmas? | |
| Four days of daytime TV is my personal limit, ok, if I see another triumph over weight loss I think I'll kill myself. | |
| God is an ****! | |
| Life is wasted on the living. | |
| You know, you think getting hammered by a bus would make you a little less of a dick. | |
| Sometimes I feel all I have going for me is the color of my hair. | |
| A lot of straight guys knit these days. It's like a macho thing like, 'I am so straight I can even knit'. | |
| | Quote | Character |
|---|
| Like, if my life were a movie, I'd fall asleep or walk out. | |
| Thankyou, I've had the best time coming to this funny restaurant and having you yell at me in the bathroom. | |
| Happy's a concept I try not to buy into. It just gets me into trouble. | |
| This is what I'm supposed to do, which is why I've spent so much time running away from it. | |
| When somebody sees you as you really are, and still wants to be with you, that's powerful. | |
| Sometimes I feel like if I don't do or say exactly what you want, you won't want to be with me. | |
| I wish that just once people wouldn't act like the cliches they are. | |
| Just because you're a shrink doesn't mean you're not insane! | |
| Look! I really wanna hit someone right now and it might as well be you. | |
| Oh go give yourself a handjob! | |
|
The Simpsons 
Fresh Prince of Bel Air 
Name That Sitcom
