Our Dumb World

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Can you name the country by its entry subheading in The Onion's 'Our Dumb World'?

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SubheadingCountry
Willing To Relocate For Work
Warning: Do Not Lend This Nation Money
In Africa's Success Story, A Hidden Genocide
Running On Fumes
Not To Be Confused With Macedonia
An Allah-Inclusive Terrorist Resort
Don't Breathe The Air
Suppressing The Urge To Chop You In Half With An Axe
The Completist's Genocide
Ancestral Homeland Of The Goods
Bram Stoker's Romania
Where The Rich Can Strike It Richer
Soon To Be Underwater
One Nation Above God
The Worst Of Both Worlds
President Bongo's Private Residence
Congratulations, You Just Laughed At Thousands Of Starving People
Where The Reading Rainbow Ends
Living High Off The Land
Doing Terrorism's Grunt Work
They Are Called 'Kyrgyz,' And It Only Goes Downhill From There
Definitely Possibly A Country
Ruled By Lemurs
Even More Chritian Than The Other Georgia
Nobel Prize Winner For Great Cheekbones
Properties Available, Inquire Today
To Hezbollah In A Handbasket
Birtplace Of Classical Muzak
God's Pratical Joke
A Mystical Land Of Junk
You Are Most Welcome...To Get Out of Syria!
Living Fat Off The Land
Home Of The Lovely Queen Rania
A Bad Neighborhood
Demoted To The Fourth World
Inhabitable By 2307
So 'Cold' From All The 'Ice'
'F*** Everyone'
From Rags To Tatters
Why Spend Hundreds On A Name-Brand African Country?
A Beautiful Nazi Retirement Community
A Great Ballpark In A Bad Neighborhood
A To-Go Nation
Going Through A Rebellious Phase
You Will Be Shot On Sight
It's All Your Fault
Must Be 18 Years Or Older To Enter
At Least We're Not Democratic Republic Of Congo
United In Circular Dancing
Like A Zoo You Get Killed At
A Proud Tradition Of Chocolate, And Also Some Other Stuff
People At Their Most Beautiful, Humanity At Its Ugliest
Holy Living F*** - They Still Have Slaves Here
Neutral...Too Neutral
Where All Roads Lead To Serious Injury
Fighting AIDS With Bamboo Spears
Working The Cradle-To-The-Grave Shift
A Country That Got Some Sense Bombed Into It
A Shortcut With Its Own National Anthem
Once A Mighty Atlas Entry
As Seen On Animal Planet
The Distended Belly Of Africa
In A World...Where Nothing Is What It Seems...
SubheadingCountry
Please Remove Your Shoes Before Reading This
'So We've Done A Little Ethnic Cleansing'
Enjoying A Three-Century Siesta
These A**holes Don't Belong In An Atlas
'Come On In-The Water's Fine!'
We Have No Beaches
A Lush And Diverse Crime Scene
Would Trade It All For A Little More Kashmir
Where Russians Are Sent To Die
A History Of Exploitation and Colonialism Marred By Mass Suicide
A Huge Waste Of Space
Keep Your Chin Up!
What The F*** Are These Other Countries Thinking?
Oh, The Injustice!
Free Admission On Sundays
A Dangerous Place To Have A Neck
Blowing Their Pot O'Gold On Whiskey
On Loan From The U.S.
[Subtitle is replaced by copy of a fake e-mail spam letter]
An Agoraphobic's Hell
A Forward-Thinking Post-Apocalyptic Nation
An Island Unto Itself
They Had It Coming
Making Its Own Sad, Poor Way
Goodbye, Cruel World
Plight Of The Living Dead
A Mud Hole
A Money-Rich Nation
Badly In Need Of A Savior
A Nation In Smithereens
Still Searching For India
What Are You Looking At?
Why Read About Suriname?
Wrong Side Of The Spice Rack
The Catholic Disneyland
A Human Assembly Line
All Is Forbidden
You'll Only Find It On A Map
About Uzbekistan
Where A Kid Can Be A Kid Prostitute
No Child Left Alive
Totally Out Of This Atlas Section as Soon As The EU Accepts Them
Just Not The Same Without The Civil War
#1 At Being #2
Surging Ahead To The 19th Century
The Land of Opportunism
Hard-Hitting, Explosive News
A Lucky, Lucky Nation
Please Hold While We Die Of Malaria
A Muslim Woman's Dream Hell
For The United States, See Pages 9-22
Where Everything Is Legal
Escaping The American Dream
Manufacturing Crates Since 1837
South Africa's South Africa
Running 26.2 Miles From Their Problems
True Rasta No Develop Country
Yo Ho Ho And An Untracable Income
Right On The Equatorish
'Please...Give Us...Water...'
Just Getting Out Of A Bad Inernational Relationship
Fleeting Survival Of The Fittest
A Popular Nuke Destination
SubheadingCountry
2,500 Years Past Its Prime
The Baltic Drainage Region
The Final Resting Place Of Botswana
Warning: This Page Will Self-Destruct In 10 Seconds
By Estee Lauder
How Low Can A Country Go?
Terrorism's Farm Team
Let Us Plan Your Next Wedding
Allah's Cat Box
Okay, We Made This One Up
Please Don't Feed The Humans
Where The Streets Are Paved With Skulls
Conveniently Located In The Middle Of F***ing Nowhere
A Hotbed Of Islamic Extremism
Workers Of The World, Survive!
An Island Nation, Not A Disease
The World's Only Seven-Star Nation
This Luggage Isn't Going To Move Itself
The Outlet Mall Of Europe
An Island, A Palm Tree, And One Guy
Preventing Argentina From Enjoying The Pacific Ocean Since 1818
South America's Middleman
Uncharted Desert Island Economy
The Haiti Of Europe
'Wah, Wah, Wah, The Turks Were Mean To Us'
Unstable At Last
So Sorry For Getting Nuked
One Doesn't Blow
Your Sons Won't Be Sent Here
Earth's Crawlspace
Always With The G****** Pan Flutes
Huddled In the Corner Of Africa
The Bridebasket Of Europe
An Island Of Moochers
Currently In A Battered-Nation Shelter
Driven From A Land That Was Wrongfully Theirs
Europe's Basement
The Horror...The Horror...
'We're Happy Because You're Not Here'
Rotate Page 360 Degrees To Read
The Cutest Little Overpopulation Crisis
Wait, This Might Be Paraguay
All Better Now Thanks To You
No Fat Chicks
A Possible Likely Threat To The Free World, Maybe
Made In Taiwan
A Country Divided Exactly In Half
Partners In War Crime
Long Live The Late President Niyazov!
The Empty Promised Land
It's A Winter Wonderland!
Come For The Food Shortages, Stay Because You've Died
Where People Go To Say They've Been
A Neighbor You Can Bank On
Genocide-Free Since April 11, 1946
The Land That Time, Newsweek, And USA Today Forgot
Welcome To The Official DPRK World Atlas Of North Korea Atlas Page! Nuclear Capable!
Where Even The Elephants Take Bribes
Where Dirt Gets The Death Penalty
Latitude 27 South, Longitude 57 West - That's All We've Got
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start
Now Hiring 2.4 Million Busboys
A Blood Diamond Is Forever

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