Our Dumb World

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Can you name the country by its entry subheading in The Onion's 'Our Dumb World'?

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One Nation Above God
The Catholic Disneyland
The Horror...The Horror...
A Neighbor You Can Bank On
A Proud Tradition Of Chocolate, And Also Some Other Stuff
As Seen On Animal Planet
Living Fat Off The Land
All Better Now Thanks To You
An Island Nation, Not A Disease
Oh, The Injustice!
A Nation In Smithereens
No Child Left Alive
'Please...Give Us...Water...'
So 'Cold' From All The 'Ice'
A Bad Neighborhood
Goodbye, Cruel World
Fighting AIDS With Bamboo Spears
Wait, This Might Be Paraguay
A Country Divided Exactly In Half
A Huge Waste Of Space
About Uzbekistan
The Worst Of Both Worlds
Would Trade It All For A Little More Kashmir
Workers Of The World, Survive!
Allah's Cat Box
No Fat Chicks
Ruled By Lemurs
Currently In A Battered-Nation Shelter
The Land That Time, Newsweek, And USA Today Forgot
A Lucky, Lucky Nation
Latitude 27 South, Longitude 57 West - That's All We've Got
Where Even The Elephants Take Bribes
A Hotbed Of Islamic Extremism
Birtplace Of Classical Muzak
Keep Your Chin Up!
Escaping The American Dream
Yo Ho Ho And An Untracable Income
'Wah, Wah, Wah, The Turks Were Mean To Us'
They Had It Coming
An Island Of Moochers
Free Admission On Sundays
By Estee Lauder
At Least We're Not Democratic Republic Of Congo
Demoted To The Fourth World
A Forward-Thinking Post-Apocalyptic Nation
Running On Fumes
A Mystical Land Of Junk
Hard-Hitting, Explosive News
Where Everything Is Legal
On Loan From The U.S.
Living High Off The Land
Neutral...Too Neutral
Where The Streets Are Paved With Skulls
Made In Taiwan
Come For The Food Shortages, Stay Because You've Died
Badly In Need Of A Savior
So Sorry For Getting Nuked
The Bridebasket Of Europe
The Empty Promised Land
Plight Of The Living Dead
The Baltic Drainage Region
Like A Zoo You Get Killed At
Where Russians Are Sent To Die
A Great Ballpark In A Bad Neighborhood
To Hezbollah In A Handbasket
Running 26.2 Miles From Their Problems
[Subtitle is replaced by copy of a fake e-mail spam letter]
You Will Be Shot On Sight
A Human Assembly Line
In A World...Where Nothing Is What It Seems...
A Possible Likely Threat To The Free World, Maybe
Uncharted Desert Island Economy
Okay, We Made This One Up
Manufacturing Crates Since 1837
Rotate Page 360 Degrees To Read
How Low Can A Country Go?
Now Hiring 2.4 Million Busboys
A Mud Hole
#1 At Being #2
Warning: Do Not Lend This Nation Money
The Distended Belly Of Africa
Please Remove Your Shoes Before Reading This
Driven From A Land That Was Wrongfully Theirs
Definitely Possibly A Country
We Have No Beaches
Warning: This Page Will Self-Destruct In 10 Seconds
Where People Go To Say They've Been
A Beautiful Nazi Retirement Community
An Island, A Palm Tree, And One Guy
Please Don't Feed The Humans
'We're Happy Because You're Not Here'
These A**holes Don't Belong In An Atlas
The Haiti Of Europe
A Lush And Diverse Crime Scene
A To-Go Nation
An Island Unto Itself
Willing To Relocate For Work
Where Dirt Gets The Death Penalty
From Rags To Tatters
Must Be 18 Years Or Older To Enter
Enjoying A Three-Century Siesta
Where All Roads Lead To Serious Injury
You Are Most Welcome...To Get Out of Syria!
Nobel Prize Winner For Great Cheekbones
The Outlet Mall Of Europe
All Is Forbidden
'So We've Done A Little Ethnic Cleansing'
Suppressing The Urge To Chop You In Half With An Axe
It's A Winter Wonderland!
Even More Chritian Than The Other Georgia
People At Their Most Beautiful, Humanity At Its Ugliest
Making Its Own Sad, Poor Way
Long Live The Late President Niyazov!
A Blood Diamond Is Forever
Terrorism's Farm Team
A Dangerous Place To Have A Neck
What Are You Looking At?
A History Of Exploitation and Colonialism Marred By Mass Suicide
Don't Breathe The Air
Just Getting Out Of A Bad Inernational Relationship
Welcome To The Official DPRK World Atlas Of North Korea Atlas Page! Nuclear Capable!
Preventing Argentina From Enjoying The Pacific Ocean Since 1818
A Shortcut With Its Own National Anthem
Fleeting Survival Of The Fittest
Conveniently Located In The Middle Of F***ing Nowhere
Working The Cradle-To-The-Grave Shift
Always With The G****** Pan Flutes
Where A Kid Can Be A Kid Prostitute
Bram Stoker's Romania
Totally Out Of This Atlas Section as Soon As The EU Accepts Them
A Popular Nuke Destination
Unstable At Last
An Allah-Inclusive Terrorist Resort
This Luggage Isn't Going To Move Itself
A Money-Rich Nation
2,500 Years Past Its Prime
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start
South Africa's South Africa
True Rasta No Develop Country
Doing Terrorism's Grunt Work
Where The Reading Rainbow Ends
'Come On In-The Water's Fine!'
A Country That Got Some Sense Bombed Into It
The World's Only Seven-Star Nation
Still Searching For India
Right On The Equatorish
Ancestral Homeland Of The Goods
United In Circular Dancing
Home Of The Lovely Queen Rania
An Agoraphobic's Hell
The Land of Opportunism
The Completist's Genocide
A Muslim Woman's Dream Hell
Why Spend Hundreds On A Name-Brand African Country?
For The United States, See Pages 9-22
President Bongo's Private Residence
God's Pratical Joke
What The F*** Are These Other Countries Thinking?
They Are Called 'Kyrgyz,' And It Only Goes Downhill From There
One Doesn't Blow
Europe's Basement
Let Us Plan Your Next Wedding
Wrong Side Of The Spice Rack
Going Through A Rebellious Phase
Properties Available, Inquire Today
'F*** Everyone'
In Africa's Success Story, A Hidden Genocide
The Cutest Little Overpopulation Crisis
Inhabitable By 2307
Your Sons Won't Be Sent Here
Just Not The Same Without The Civil War
Earth's Crawlspace
Not To Be Confused With Macedonia
Once A Mighty Atlas Entry
Genocide-Free Since April 11, 1946
Soon To Be Underwater
Partners In War Crime
The Final Resting Place Of Botswana
It's All Your Fault
Congratulations, You Just Laughed At Thousands Of Starving People
Why Read About Suriname?
Where The Rich Can Strike It Richer
You'll Only Find It On A Map
South America's Middleman
Holy Living F*** - They Still Have Slaves Here
Surging Ahead To The 19th Century
Huddled In the Corner Of Africa
Please Hold While We Die Of Malaria
Blowing Their Pot O'Gold On Whiskey

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