Our Dumb World

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Can you name the country by its entry subheading in The Onion's 'Our Dumb World'?

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Yo Ho Ho And An Untracable Income
The World's Only Seven-Star Nation
Like A Zoo You Get Killed At
What Are You Looking At?
Allah's Cat Box
Properties Available, Inquire Today
Congratulations, You Just Laughed At Thousands Of Starving People
Where The Reading Rainbow Ends
On Loan From The U.S.
Making Its Own Sad, Poor Way
Bram Stoker's Romania
Right On The Equatorish
Welcome To The Official DPRK World Atlas Of North Korea Atlas Page! Nuclear Capable!
A History Of Exploitation and Colonialism Marred By Mass Suicide
A Hotbed Of Islamic Extremism
Once A Mighty Atlas Entry
Birtplace Of Classical Muzak
Where The Rich Can Strike It Richer
A Nation In Smithereens
A Huge Waste Of Space
Oh, The Injustice!
So Sorry For Getting Nuked
Even More Chritian Than The Other Georgia
Holy Living F*** - They Still Have Slaves Here
The Empty Promised Land
An Agoraphobic's Hell
They Had It Coming
Running On Fumes
'Wah, Wah, Wah, The Turks Were Mean To Us'
An Island Unto Itself
South America's Middleman
Just Getting Out Of A Bad Inernational Relationship
Plight Of The Living Dead
Always With The G****** Pan Flutes
An Allah-Inclusive Terrorist Resort
It's All Your Fault
Badly In Need Of A Savior
Home Of The Lovely Queen Rania
The Final Resting Place Of Botswana
Living Fat Off The Land
A Money-Rich Nation
Working The Cradle-To-The-Grave Shift
Ruled By Lemurs
Where Even The Elephants Take Bribes
A Human Assembly Line
'Please...Give Us...Water...'
A Great Ballpark In A Bad Neighborhood
Demoted To The Fourth World
2,500 Years Past Its Prime
Genocide-Free Since April 11, 1946
People At Their Most Beautiful, Humanity At Its Ugliest
A Country That Got Some Sense Bombed Into It
Definitely Possibly A Country
A Blood Diamond Is Forever
A Dangerous Place To Have A Neck
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start
Fighting AIDS With Bamboo Spears
'Come On In-The Water's Fine!'
All Is Forbidden
United In Circular Dancing
Partners In War Crime
Where A Kid Can Be A Kid Prostitute
A Lucky, Lucky Nation
Terrorism's Farm Team
Where Dirt Gets The Death Penalty
The Land That Time, Newsweek, And USA Today Forgot
Conveniently Located In The Middle Of F***ing Nowhere
Europe's Basement
A Lush And Diverse Crime Scene
A Muslim Woman's Dream Hell
A Forward-Thinking Post-Apocalyptic Nation
You Will Be Shot On Sight
The Land of Opportunism
South Africa's South Africa
Let Us Plan Your Next Wedding
No Fat Chicks
Currently In A Battered-Nation Shelter
Rotate Page 360 Degrees To Read
Now Hiring 2.4 Million Busboys
By Estee Lauder
'F*** Everyone'
As Seen On Animal Planet
Warning: Do Not Lend This Nation Money
Huddled In the Corner Of Africa
Made In Taiwan
Not To Be Confused With Macedonia
Manufacturing Crates Since 1837
An Island, A Palm Tree, And One Guy
The Completist's Genocide
'We're Happy Because You're Not Here'
What The F*** Are These Other Countries Thinking?
At Least We're Not Democratic Republic Of Congo
An Island Of Moochers
Escaping The American Dream
It's A Winter Wonderland!
So 'Cold' From All The 'Ice'
The Cutest Little Overpopulation Crisis
Doing Terrorism's Grunt Work
For The United States, See Pages 9-22
One Doesn't Blow
Inhabitable By 2307
Fleeting Survival Of The Fittest
Neutral...Too Neutral
Blowing Their Pot O'Gold On Whiskey
Driven From A Land That Was Wrongfully Theirs
Latitude 27 South, Longitude 57 West - That's All We've Got
Going Through A Rebellious Phase
Come For The Food Shortages, Stay Because You've Died
The Distended Belly Of Africa
A To-Go Nation
Unstable At Last
The Horror...The Horror...
The Outlet Mall Of Europe
A Beautiful Nazi Retirement Community
Please Remove Your Shoes Before Reading This
The Worst Of Both Worlds
How Low Can A Country Go?
Living High Off The Land
The Haiti Of Europe
We Have No Beaches
You Are Most Welcome...To Get Out of Syria!
Where Everything Is Legal
Your Sons Won't Be Sent Here
Wait, This Might Be Paraguay
Workers Of The World, Survive!
A Country Divided Exactly In Half
Don't Breathe The Air
Where People Go To Say They've Been
#1 At Being #2
Would Trade It All For A Little More Kashmir
In A World...Where Nothing Is What It Seems...
You'll Only Find It On A Map
A Neighbor You Can Bank On
No Child Left Alive
A Proud Tradition Of Chocolate, And Also Some Other Stuff
Where All Roads Lead To Serious Injury
To Hezbollah In A Handbasket
Suppressing The Urge To Chop You In Half With An Axe
Still Searching For India
Long Live The Late President Niyazov!
About Uzbekistan
President Bongo's Private Residence
Soon To Be Underwater
These A**holes Don't Belong In An Atlas
True Rasta No Develop Country
A Popular Nuke Destination
One Nation Above God
Where Russians Are Sent To Die
All Better Now Thanks To You
[Subtitle is replaced by copy of a fake e-mail spam letter]
Why Spend Hundreds On A Name-Brand African Country?
Warning: This Page Will Self-Destruct In 10 Seconds
'So We've Done A Little Ethnic Cleansing'
Ancestral Homeland Of The Goods
Willing To Relocate For Work
Hard-Hitting, Explosive News
Goodbye, Cruel World
Why Read About Suriname?
Earth's Crawlspace
A Mystical Land Of Junk
Must Be 18 Years Or Older To Enter
Preventing Argentina From Enjoying The Pacific Ocean Since 1818
A Possible Likely Threat To The Free World, Maybe
The Bridebasket Of Europe
The Catholic Disneyland
A Mud Hole
Just Not The Same Without The Civil War
The Baltic Drainage Region
A Bad Neighborhood
Please Don't Feed The Humans
They Are Called 'Kyrgyz,' And It Only Goes Downhill From There
Please Hold While We Die Of Malaria
Keep Your Chin Up!
Enjoying A Three-Century Siesta
A Shortcut With Its Own National Anthem
This Luggage Isn't Going To Move Itself
Where The Streets Are Paved With Skulls
An Island Nation, Not A Disease
Surging Ahead To The 19th Century
God's Pratical Joke
Totally Out Of This Atlas Section as Soon As The EU Accepts Them
Free Admission On Sundays
From Rags To Tatters
Okay, We Made This One Up
Uncharted Desert Island Economy
Wrong Side Of The Spice Rack
Nobel Prize Winner For Great Cheekbones
Running 26.2 Miles From Their Problems
In Africa's Success Story, A Hidden Genocide

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Created Jan 1, 2010Editor's PickReportNominate
Tags:country, world, dumb, entry, onion, subheading, The Onion