Our Dumb World

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Can you name the country by its entry subheading in The Onion's 'Our Dumb World'?

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SubheadingCountry
The Bridebasket Of Europe
A Human Assembly Line
Right On The Equatorish
South Africa's South Africa
Willing To Relocate For Work
The Baltic Drainage Region
South America's Middleman
As Seen On Animal Planet
Conveniently Located In The Middle Of F***ing Nowhere
Fleeting Survival Of The Fittest
The Worst Of Both Worlds
Running On Fumes
A History Of Exploitation and Colonialism Marred By Mass Suicide
A Popular Nuke Destination
A Mystical Land Of Junk
Preventing Argentina From Enjoying The Pacific Ocean Since 1818
Where Even The Elephants Take Bribes
Where Russians Are Sent To Die
Suppressing The Urge To Chop You In Half With An Axe
By Estee Lauder
An Agoraphobic's Hell
Oh, The Injustice!
An Island, A Palm Tree, And One Guy
Hard-Hitting, Explosive News
Yo Ho Ho And An Untracable Income
'Please...Give Us...Water...'
A Bad Neighborhood
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start
Wrong Side Of The Spice Rack
Blowing Their Pot O'Gold On Whiskey
We Have No Beaches
Even More Chritian Than The Other Georgia
Wait, This Might Be Paraguay
Always With The G****** Pan Flutes
One Doesn't Blow
President Bongo's Private Residence
Please Don't Feed The Humans
Why Read About Suriname?
[Subtitle is replaced by copy of a fake e-mail spam letter]
Partners In War Crime
Living High Off The Land
A Mud Hole
Europe's Basement
Going Through A Rebellious Phase
Home Of The Lovely Queen Rania
It's A Winter Wonderland!
True Rasta No Develop Country
Running 26.2 Miles From Their Problems
About Uzbekistan
Manufacturing Crates Since 1837
You Are Most Welcome...To Get Out of Syria!
Properties Available, Inquire Today
Where The Streets Are Paved With Skulls
Birtplace Of Classical Muzak
On Loan From The U.S.
Working The Cradle-To-The-Grave Shift
Doing Terrorism's Grunt Work
A Money-Rich Nation
Ancestral Homeland Of The Goods
Welcome To The Official DPRK World Atlas Of North Korea Atlas Page! Nuclear Capable!
Soon To Be Underwater
Please Remove Your Shoes Before Reading This
Badly In Need Of A Savior
SubheadingCountry
Plight Of The Living Dead
No Fat Chicks
Holy Living F*** - They Still Have Slaves Here
A Shortcut With Its Own National Anthem
In A World...Where Nothing Is What It Seems...
Uncharted Desert Island Economy
This Luggage Isn't Going To Move Itself
All Better Now Thanks To You
These A**holes Don't Belong In An Atlas
Would Trade It All For A Little More Kashmir
The Distended Belly Of Africa
The Land That Time, Newsweek, And USA Today Forgot
A Neighbor You Can Bank On
Living Fat Off The Land
Please Hold While We Die Of Malaria
Huddled In the Corner Of Africa
The Outlet Mall Of Europe
Earth's Crawlspace
Terrorism's Farm Team
A Lush And Diverse Crime Scene
What Are You Looking At?
The Haiti Of Europe
2,500 Years Past Its Prime
Your Sons Won't Be Sent Here
Nobel Prize Winner For Great Cheekbones
'Wah, Wah, Wah, The Turks Were Mean To Us'
For The United States, See Pages 9-22
Goodbye, Cruel World
Where All Roads Lead To Serious Injury
Just Getting Out Of A Bad Inernational Relationship
'F*** Everyone'
Okay, We Made This One Up
A Dangerous Place To Have A Neck
Like A Zoo You Get Killed At
The World's Only Seven-Star Nation
Making Its Own Sad, Poor Way
Where The Rich Can Strike It Richer
A Hotbed Of Islamic Extremism
#1 At Being #2
So Sorry For Getting Nuked
A To-Go Nation
A Huge Waste Of Space
Congratulations, You Just Laughed At Thousands Of Starving People
The Catholic Disneyland
Why Spend Hundreds On A Name-Brand African Country?
God's Pratical Joke
One Nation Above God
Demoted To The Fourth World
What The F*** Are These Other Countries Thinking?
Made In Taiwan
Bram Stoker's Romania
A Great Ballpark In A Bad Neighborhood
Don't Breathe The Air
To Hezbollah In A Handbasket
They Had It Coming
At Least We're Not Democratic Republic Of Congo
Ruled By Lemurs
The Land of Opportunism
The Completist's Genocide
Inhabitable By 2307
In Africa's Success Story, A Hidden Genocide
Neutral...Too Neutral
Let Us Plan Your Next Wedding
SubheadingCountry
You Will Be Shot On Sight
Surging Ahead To The 19th Century
'We're Happy Because You're Not Here'
Come For The Food Shortages, Stay Because You've Died
Warning: This Page Will Self-Destruct In 10 Seconds
Where A Kid Can Be A Kid Prostitute
It's All Your Fault
A Forward-Thinking Post-Apocalyptic Nation
Now Hiring 2.4 Million Busboys
Genocide-Free Since April 11, 1946
Where People Go To Say They've Been
A Possible Likely Threat To The Free World, Maybe
The Horror...The Horror...
Rotate Page 360 Degrees To Read
Must Be 18 Years Or Older To Enter
Just Not The Same Without The Civil War
They Are Called 'Kyrgyz,' And It Only Goes Downhill From There
An Island Nation, Not A Disease
A Muslim Woman's Dream Hell
Driven From A Land That Was Wrongfully Theirs
Definitely Possibly A Country
Keep Your Chin Up!
Long Live The Late President Niyazov!
'So We've Done A Little Ethnic Cleansing'
A Nation In Smithereens
You'll Only Find It On A Map
Warning: Do Not Lend This Nation Money
Fighting AIDS With Bamboo Spears
Free Admission On Sundays
How Low Can A Country Go?
Latitude 27 South, Longitude 57 West - That's All We've Got
Enjoying A Three-Century Siesta
People At Their Most Beautiful, Humanity At Its Ugliest
A Country Divided Exactly In Half
A Proud Tradition Of Chocolate, And Also Some Other Stuff
The Final Resting Place Of Botswana
From Rags To Tatters
So 'Cold' From All The 'Ice'
Escaping The American Dream
No Child Left Alive
An Island Of Moochers
Currently In A Battered-Nation Shelter
United In Circular Dancing
The Empty Promised Land
An Island Unto Itself
Still Searching For India
Where Everything Is Legal
A Lucky, Lucky Nation
An Allah-Inclusive Terrorist Resort
A Beautiful Nazi Retirement Community
All Is Forbidden
Unstable At Last
A Blood Diamond Is Forever
The Cutest Little Overpopulation Crisis
Where The Reading Rainbow Ends
Not To Be Confused With Macedonia
Allah's Cat Box
'Come On In-The Water's Fine!'
Workers Of The World, Survive!
Once A Mighty Atlas Entry
A Country That Got Some Sense Bombed Into It
Totally Out Of This Atlas Section as Soon As The EU Accepts Them
Where Dirt Gets The Death Penalty

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