Our Dumb World

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Can you name the country by its entry subheading in The Onion's 'Our Dumb World'?

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South Africa's South Africa
Long Live The Late President Niyazov!
Genocide-Free Since April 11, 1946
2,500 Years Past Its Prime
Neutral...Too Neutral
Terrorism's Farm Team
Unstable At Last
Warning: This Page Will Self-Destruct In 10 Seconds
United In Circular Dancing
An Island, A Palm Tree, And One Guy
Keep Your Chin Up!
They Are Called 'Kyrgyz,' And It Only Goes Downhill From There
Currently In A Battered-Nation Shelter
For The United States, See Pages 9-22
A Blood Diamond Is Forever
Your Sons Won't Be Sent Here
No Child Left Alive
The Horror...The Horror...
A Lucky, Lucky Nation
Where The Rich Can Strike It Richer
The Outlet Mall Of Europe
President Bongo's Private Residence
Huddled In the Corner Of Africa
Bram Stoker's Romania
A Neighbor You Can Bank On
So Sorry For Getting Nuked
'We're Happy Because You're Not Here'
A Possible Likely Threat To The Free World, Maybe
The Baltic Drainage Region
An Island Unto Itself
A Popular Nuke Destination
The Land That Time, Newsweek, And USA Today Forgot
Not To Be Confused With Macedonia
Where Russians Are Sent To Die
An Island Nation, Not A Disease
A Huge Waste Of Space
Living Fat Off The Land
True Rasta No Develop Country
Conveniently Located In The Middle Of F***ing Nowhere
Home Of The Lovely Queen Rania
A To-Go Nation
No Fat Chicks
Must Be 18 Years Or Older To Enter
Properties Available, Inquire Today
The Worst Of Both Worlds
Please Remove Your Shoes Before Reading This
Doing Terrorism's Grunt Work
Come For The Food Shortages, Stay Because You've Died
Europe's Basement
A Great Ballpark In A Bad Neighborhood
The Distended Belly Of Africa
Driven From A Land That Was Wrongfully Theirs
In A World...Where Nothing Is What It Seems...
Let Us Plan Your Next Wedding
Would Trade It All For A Little More Kashmir
From Rags To Tatters
Nobel Prize Winner For Great Cheekbones
A Money-Rich Nation
Oh, The Injustice!
Definitely Possibly A Country
Soon To Be Underwater
Warning: Do Not Lend This Nation Money
By Estee Lauder
Rotate Page 360 Degrees To Read
This Luggage Isn't Going To Move Itself
Living High Off The Land
Just Not The Same Without The Civil War
How Low Can A Country Go?
Holy Living F*** - They Still Have Slaves Here
Birtplace Of Classical Muzak
Why Spend Hundreds On A Name-Brand African Country?
We Have No Beaches
Working The Cradle-To-The-Grave Shift
Going Through A Rebellious Phase
The Land of Opportunism
Fighting AIDS With Bamboo Spears
Willing To Relocate For Work
Ancestral Homeland Of The Goods
Made In Taiwan
God's Pratical Joke
What Are You Looking At?
A Dangerous Place To Have A Neck
The Bridebasket Of Europe
Badly In Need Of A Savior
Plight Of The Living Dead
So 'Cold' From All The 'Ice'
An Allah-Inclusive Terrorist Resort
Surging Ahead To The 19th Century
You Will Be Shot On Sight
Manufacturing Crates Since 1837
Now Hiring 2.4 Million Busboys
At Least We're Not Democratic Republic Of Congo
People At Their Most Beautiful, Humanity At Its Ugliest
Where All Roads Lead To Serious Injury
A Nation In Smithereens
Running On Fumes
Blowing Their Pot O'Gold On Whiskey
Right On The Equatorish
Allah's Cat Box
Okay, We Made This One Up
Wrong Side Of The Spice Rack
A Shortcut With Its Own National Anthem
About Uzbekistan
Preventing Argentina From Enjoying The Pacific Ocean Since 1818
The Completist's Genocide
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start
Where Dirt Gets The Death Penalty
[Subtitle is replaced by copy of a fake e-mail spam letter]
Where Even The Elephants Take Bribes
'F*** Everyone'
Wait, This Might Be Paraguay
Suppressing The Urge To Chop You In Half With An Axe
All Better Now Thanks To You
Free Admission On Sundays
The World's Only Seven-Star Nation
You Are Most Welcome...To Get Out of Syria!
They Had It Coming
Yo Ho Ho And An Untracable Income
A History Of Exploitation and Colonialism Marred By Mass Suicide
The Final Resting Place Of Botswana
Please Hold While We Die Of Malaria
Don't Breathe The Air
Just Getting Out Of A Bad Inernational Relationship
Inhabitable By 2307
Still Searching For India
Earth's Crawlspace
'Please...Give Us...Water...'
A Mud Hole
You'll Only Find It On A Map
Why Read About Suriname?
#1 At Being #2
Where Everything Is Legal
Escaping The American Dream
A Beautiful Nazi Retirement Community
Totally Out Of This Atlas Section as Soon As The EU Accepts Them
Where A Kid Can Be A Kid Prostitute
The Cutest Little Overpopulation Crisis
Always With The G****** Pan Flutes
Please Don't Feed The Humans
A Bad Neighborhood
Even More Chritian Than The Other Georgia
Where The Reading Rainbow Ends
What The F*** Are These Other Countries Thinking?
The Empty Promised Land
'So We've Done A Little Ethnic Cleansing'
As Seen On Animal Planet
A Mystical Land Of Junk
In Africa's Success Story, A Hidden Genocide
Ruled By Lemurs
To Hezbollah In A Handbasket
A Country That Got Some Sense Bombed Into It
Welcome To The Official DPRK World Atlas Of North Korea Atlas Page! Nuclear Capable!
A Proud Tradition Of Chocolate, And Also Some Other Stuff
A Lush And Diverse Crime Scene
A Country Divided Exactly In Half
Where People Go To Say They've Been
The Haiti Of Europe
An Island Of Moochers
One Nation Above God
Hard-Hitting, Explosive News
The Catholic Disneyland
Uncharted Desert Island Economy
South America's Middleman
These A**holes Don't Belong In An Atlas
An Agoraphobic's Hell
All Is Forbidden
A Muslim Woman's Dream Hell
Like A Zoo You Get Killed At
'Come On In-The Water's Fine!'
A Human Assembly Line
Goodbye, Cruel World
Workers Of The World, Survive!
On Loan From The U.S.
It's All Your Fault
One Doesn't Blow
Demoted To The Fourth World
Running 26.2 Miles From Their Problems
Making Its Own Sad, Poor Way
Enjoying A Three-Century Siesta
Partners In War Crime
A Hotbed Of Islamic Extremism
'Wah, Wah, Wah, The Turks Were Mean To Us'
Once A Mighty Atlas Entry
Where The Streets Are Paved With Skulls
Latitude 27 South, Longitude 57 West - That's All We've Got
A Forward-Thinking Post-Apocalyptic Nation
Fleeting Survival Of The Fittest
Congratulations, You Just Laughed At Thousands Of Starving People
It's A Winter Wonderland!

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Created Jan 1, 2010Editor's PickReportNominate
Tags:country, world, dumb, entry, onion, subheading, The Onion