Our Dumb World

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Can you name the country by its entry subheading in The Onion's 'Our Dumb World'?

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SubheadingCountry
They Had It Coming
Surging Ahead To The 19th Century
How Low Can A Country Go?
Where The Rich Can Strike It Richer
United In Circular Dancing
Wait, This Might Be Paraguay
Huddled In the Corner Of Africa
Right On The Equatorish
Living Fat Off The Land
No Fat Chicks
Rotate Page 360 Degrees To Read
'Wah, Wah, Wah, The Turks Were Mean To Us'
A Lush And Diverse Crime Scene
A Hotbed Of Islamic Extremism
Where People Go To Say They've Been
Why Spend Hundreds On A Name-Brand African Country?
Now Hiring 2.4 Million Busboys
Partners In War Crime
Still Searching For India
Like A Zoo You Get Killed At
Genocide-Free Since April 11, 1946
Ruled By Lemurs
People At Their Most Beautiful, Humanity At Its Ugliest
Allah's Cat Box
The Empty Promised Land
The Horror...The Horror...
Workers Of The World, Survive!
These A**holes Don't Belong In An Atlas
We Have No Beaches
Willing To Relocate For Work
A Muslim Woman's Dream Hell
Going Through A Rebellious Phase
Congratulations, You Just Laughed At Thousands Of Starving People
Welcome To The Official DPRK World Atlas Of North Korea Atlas Page! Nuclear Capable!
Don't Breathe The Air
Terrorism's Farm Team
Living High Off The Land
Running On Fumes
From Rags To Tatters
The Distended Belly Of Africa
The Haiti Of Europe
'Come On In-The Water's Fine!'
At Least We're Not Democratic Republic Of Congo
A Money-Rich Nation
Ancestral Homeland Of The Goods
'So We've Done A Little Ethnic Cleansing'
About Uzbekistan
A Huge Waste Of Space
By Estee Lauder
Running 26.2 Miles From Their Problems
A Blood Diamond Is Forever
2,500 Years Past Its Prime
[Subtitle is replaced by copy of a fake e-mail spam letter]
A History Of Exploitation and Colonialism Marred By Mass Suicide
The Land That Time, Newsweek, And USA Today Forgot
A Bad Neighborhood
Warning: This Page Will Self-Destruct In 10 Seconds
A To-Go Nation
It's All Your Fault
President Bongo's Private Residence
A Forward-Thinking Post-Apocalyptic Nation
An Allah-Inclusive Terrorist Resort
Where Dirt Gets The Death Penalty
SubheadingCountry
Neutral...Too Neutral
The Final Resting Place Of Botswana
Just Not The Same Without The Civil War
Manufacturing Crates Since 1837
Definitely Possibly A Country
A Country Divided Exactly In Half
'We're Happy Because You're Not Here'
The Cutest Little Overpopulation Crisis
Fleeting Survival Of The Fittest
This Luggage Isn't Going To Move Itself
A Great Ballpark In A Bad Neighborhood
Warning: Do Not Lend This Nation Money
Unstable At Last
Demoted To The Fourth World
Bram Stoker's Romania
Where Even The Elephants Take Bribes
A Beautiful Nazi Retirement Community
True Rasta No Develop Country
Where The Reading Rainbow Ends
A Mud Hole
'Please...Give Us...Water...'
A Lucky, Lucky Nation
South Africa's South Africa
A Proud Tradition Of Chocolate, And Also Some Other Stuff
So Sorry For Getting Nuked
Working The Cradle-To-The-Grave Shift
Okay, We Made This One Up
To Hezbollah In A Handbasket
All Better Now Thanks To You
An Island, A Palm Tree, And One Guy
The Baltic Drainage Region
Uncharted Desert Island Economy
You Are Most Welcome...To Get Out of Syria!
Wrong Side Of The Spice Rack
Making Its Own Sad, Poor Way
The Outlet Mall Of Europe
One Nation Above God
A Country That Got Some Sense Bombed Into It
You Will Be Shot On Sight
#1 At Being #2
The Catholic Disneyland
A Dangerous Place To Have A Neck
Why Read About Suriname?
The Worst Of Both Worlds
The Bridebasket Of Europe
An Island Unto Itself
As Seen On Animal Planet
Properties Available, Inquire Today
Goodbye, Cruel World
Driven From A Land That Was Wrongfully Theirs
Hard-Hitting, Explosive News
A Possible Likely Threat To The Free World, Maybe
An Island Of Moochers
On Loan From The U.S.
Where Everything Is Legal
A Mystical Land Of Junk
Birtplace Of Classical Muzak
Suppressing The Urge To Chop You In Half With An Axe
What The F*** Are These Other Countries Thinking?
No Child Left Alive
A Shortcut With Its Own National Anthem
Soon To Be Underwater
An Island Nation, Not A Disease
SubheadingCountry
Please Remove Your Shoes Before Reading This
One Doesn't Blow
Enjoying A Three-Century Siesta
So 'Cold' From All The 'Ice'
The World's Only Seven-Star Nation
Where A Kid Can Be A Kid Prostitute
A Human Assembly Line
Just Getting Out Of A Bad Inernational Relationship
A Nation In Smithereens
A Neighbor You Can Bank On
Doing Terrorism's Grunt Work
Not To Be Confused With Macedonia
Inhabitable By 2307
Keep Your Chin Up!
Even More Chritian Than The Other Georgia
Where Russians Are Sent To Die
They Are Called 'Kyrgyz,' And It Only Goes Downhill From There
You'll Only Find It On A Map
Please Hold While We Die Of Malaria
What Are You Looking At?
Fighting AIDS With Bamboo Spears
Made In Taiwan
Long Live The Late President Niyazov!
Where The Streets Are Paved With Skulls
Holy Living F*** - They Still Have Slaves Here
God's Pratical Joke
Conveniently Located In The Middle Of F***ing Nowhere
Badly In Need Of A Savior
Earth's Crawlspace
Where All Roads Lead To Serious Injury
All Is Forbidden
Preventing Argentina From Enjoying The Pacific Ocean Since 1818
Escaping The American Dream
Currently In A Battered-Nation Shelter
The Land of Opportunism
Oh, The Injustice!
Once A Mighty Atlas Entry
Plight Of The Living Dead
Please Don't Feed The Humans
It's A Winter Wonderland!
Would Trade It All For A Little More Kashmir
Always With The G****** Pan Flutes
A Popular Nuke Destination
An Agoraphobic's Hell
Yo Ho Ho And An Untracable Income
Let Us Plan Your Next Wedding
Come For The Food Shortages, Stay Because You've Died
Blowing Their Pot O'Gold On Whiskey
In A World...Where Nothing Is What It Seems...
Latitude 27 South, Longitude 57 West - That's All We've Got
Must Be 18 Years Or Older To Enter
South America's Middleman
The Completist's Genocide
For The United States, See Pages 9-22
Totally Out Of This Atlas Section as Soon As The EU Accepts Them
Your Sons Won't Be Sent Here
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start
Nobel Prize Winner For Great Cheekbones
Free Admission On Sundays
Europe's Basement
In Africa's Success Story, A Hidden Genocide
Home Of The Lovely Queen Rania
'F*** Everyone'

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Created Jan 1, 2010Editor's PickReportNominate
Tags:country, world, dumb, entry, onion, subheading, The Onion