Our Dumb World

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Can you name the country by its entry subheading in The Onion's 'Our Dumb World'?

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A Shortcut With Its Own National Anthem
So Sorry For Getting Nuked
Where A Kid Can Be A Kid Prostitute
#1 At Being #2
It's A Winter Wonderland!
Making Its Own Sad, Poor Way
Willing To Relocate For Work
Manufacturing Crates Since 1837
A Dangerous Place To Have A Neck
About Uzbekistan
Ruled By Lemurs
In A World...Where Nothing Is What It Seems...
Where The Streets Are Paved With Skulls
United In Circular Dancing
You Are Most Welcome...To Get Out of Syria!
Where Russians Are Sent To Die
A Country Divided Exactly In Half
The Worst Of Both Worlds
Enjoying A Three-Century Siesta
Okay, We Made This One Up
You Will Be Shot On Sight
The Distended Belly Of Africa
Earth's Crawlspace
Don't Breathe The Air
A Huge Waste Of Space
Plight Of The Living Dead
Where Even The Elephants Take Bribes
In Africa's Success Story, A Hidden Genocide
You'll Only Find It On A Map
What The F*** Are These Other Countries Thinking?
For The United States, See Pages 9-22
From Rags To Tatters
Uncharted Desert Island Economy
Even More Chritian Than The Other Georgia
Europe's Basement
What Are You Looking At?
Would Trade It All For A Little More Kashmir
A Great Ballpark In A Bad Neighborhood
Still Searching For India
Surging Ahead To The 19th Century
The Bridebasket Of Europe
Long Live The Late President Niyazov!
As Seen On Animal Planet
Badly In Need Of A Savior
Congratulations, You Just Laughed At Thousands Of Starving People
Not To Be Confused With Macedonia
South America's Middleman
A Proud Tradition Of Chocolate, And Also Some Other Stuff
A Lush And Diverse Crime Scene
Just Getting Out Of A Bad Inernational Relationship
A Country That Got Some Sense Bombed Into It
Must Be 18 Years Or Older To Enter
Just Not The Same Without The Civil War
2,500 Years Past Its Prime
The Horror...The Horror...
A Lucky, Lucky Nation
Let Us Plan Your Next Wedding
The Haiti Of Europe
Yo Ho Ho And An Untracable Income
People At Their Most Beautiful, Humanity At Its Ugliest
Rotate Page 360 Degrees To Read
Please Hold While We Die Of Malaria
The Final Resting Place Of Botswana
All Better Now Thanks To You
Definitely Possibly A Country
Where Dirt Gets The Death Penalty
Warning: Do Not Lend This Nation Money
Doing Terrorism's Grunt Work
A Bad Neighborhood
A Neighbor You Can Bank On
A Mud Hole
No Child Left Alive
All Is Forbidden
An Island Of Moochers
Living Fat Off The Land
An Island Unto Itself
South Africa's South Africa
Going Through A Rebellious Phase
It's All Your Fault
How Low Can A Country Go?
An Agoraphobic's Hell
Please Don't Feed The Humans
Soon To Be Underwater
Allah's Cat Box
Bram Stoker's Romania
Inhabitable By 2307
A Possible Likely Threat To The Free World, Maybe
Hard-Hitting, Explosive News
Genocide-Free Since April 11, 1946
A Money-Rich Nation
Running On Fumes
On Loan From The U.S.
'Come On In-The Water's Fine!'
A To-Go Nation
Conveniently Located In The Middle Of F***ing Nowhere
Made In Taiwan
'F*** Everyone'
President Bongo's Private Residence
The Land of Opportunism
'Please...Give Us...Water...'
One Doesn't Blow
A Mystical Land Of Junk
Wrong Side Of The Spice Rack
Terrorism's Farm Team
Where The Reading Rainbow Ends
A Muslim Woman's Dream Hell
By Estee Lauder
Wait, This Might Be Paraguay
A Blood Diamond Is Forever
Fleeting Survival Of The Fittest
Why Spend Hundreds On A Name-Brand African Country?
The Catholic Disneyland
The World's Only Seven-Star Nation
They Are Called 'Kyrgyz,' And It Only Goes Downhill From There
Demoted To The Fourth World
One Nation Above God
Partners In War Crime
Escaping The American Dream
Please Remove Your Shoes Before Reading This
Always With The G****** Pan Flutes
The Outlet Mall Of Europe
Now Hiring 2.4 Million Busboys
A Nation In Smithereens
A Hotbed Of Islamic Extremism
God's Pratical Joke
Preventing Argentina From Enjoying The Pacific Ocean Since 1818
Home Of The Lovely Queen Rania
The Cutest Little Overpopulation Crisis
A Forward-Thinking Post-Apocalyptic Nation
A Beautiful Nazi Retirement Community
Holy Living F*** - They Still Have Slaves Here
The Land That Time, Newsweek, And USA Today Forgot
We Have No Beaches
An Island Nation, Not A Disease
Come For The Food Shortages, Stay Because You've Died
The Completist's Genocide
This Luggage Isn't Going To Move Itself
Once A Mighty Atlas Entry
The Empty Promised Land
To Hezbollah In A Handbasket
Keep Your Chin Up!
Latitude 27 South, Longitude 57 West - That's All We've Got
No Fat Chicks
Goodbye, Cruel World
Why Read About Suriname?
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start
So 'Cold' From All The 'Ice'
The Baltic Drainage Region
Where The Rich Can Strike It Richer
Workers Of The World, Survive!
A History Of Exploitation and Colonialism Marred By Mass Suicide
A Popular Nuke Destination
Your Sons Won't Be Sent Here
Nobel Prize Winner For Great Cheekbones
Fighting AIDS With Bamboo Spears
'So We've Done A Little Ethnic Cleansing'
Suppressing The Urge To Chop You In Half With An Axe
They Had It Coming
A Human Assembly Line
An Island, A Palm Tree, And One Guy
An Allah-Inclusive Terrorist Resort
At Least We're Not Democratic Republic Of Congo
True Rasta No Develop Country
'We're Happy Because You're Not Here'
Like A Zoo You Get Killed At
Living High Off The Land
Neutral...Too Neutral
Huddled In the Corner Of Africa
Where Everything Is Legal
Free Admission On Sundays
[Subtitle is replaced by copy of a fake e-mail spam letter]
Totally Out Of This Atlas Section as Soon As The EU Accepts Them
Welcome To The Official DPRK World Atlas Of North Korea Atlas Page! Nuclear Capable!
Driven From A Land That Was Wrongfully Theirs
Properties Available, Inquire Today
Right On The Equatorish
Running 26.2 Miles From Their Problems
Where All Roads Lead To Serious Injury
Birtplace Of Classical Muzak
'Wah, Wah, Wah, The Turks Were Mean To Us'
Warning: This Page Will Self-Destruct In 10 Seconds
Unstable At Last
These A**holes Don't Belong In An Atlas
Where People Go To Say They've Been
Currently In A Battered-Nation Shelter
Oh, The Injustice!
Working The Cradle-To-The-Grave Shift
Ancestral Homeland Of The Goods
Blowing Their Pot O'Gold On Whiskey

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Created Jan 1, 2010Editor's PickReportNominate
Tags:country, world, dumb, entry, onion, subheading, The Onion