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Can you pick the sub-headline that goes with each of these headlines from The Onion?
Click the matching answer button below
Correctly selected answers will show up in green
Americas Finest News Source
Onion Headline Slot Machine
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AMISH GIVE UP
CLINTON DEPLOYS VOWELS TO BOSNIA
CROSS-COUNTRY BABYSITTING SPREE CONTINUES
RESTAURANT CITED FOR SERVING DEAD CHICKENS
CLEVER BUMPER STICKERS RESOLVE ABORTION ISSUE
POLICE UNIMPRESSED WITH ROOFTOP SNIPER
SHI'ITE TERRORISTS CROSS COUNTY LINE
GIANT ALTOID HEADED TOWARD EARTH
CLINTON DENIES LEWINSKY ALLEGATIONS
U.S. POPULATION AT 13,462
GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS OF PARALYZED LITTLE BOY
BUSH EXECUTES 253 NEW MEXICO DEMOCRATS
WIKIPEDIA CELEBRATES 750 YEARS OF AMERICAN INDEPENDENCE
RESIDENTS OF INDIANA JOIN TOGETHER TO FORM COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS
ENTIRE REFRIGERATOR REARRANGED TO ACCOMMODATE LEFTOVER KFC BUCKET
OBAMA ASKS STAFF TO TRY TO INCLUDE NATIONAL SECURITY ADVISER A LITTLE MORE
HEALTH DEPARTMENT STILL NOT ABLE TO PROVE WHY PEOPLE SHOULDN'T BE EATING CANDLES
CONGRESS TAKES GROUP OF SCHOOLCHILDREN HOSTAGE
PING-PONG SOMEHOW ELICITS MACHO POSTURING
WORLD MAP REARRANGED TO ACCOMMODATE POOR GEOGRAPHY SKILLS OF AMERICANS
POSTMASTER GENERAL LOSES LAPTOP
U.S. LAUNCHES AIDS-AWARENESS CAMPAIGN IN BOTSWANA
BUSH ANNOUNCES IRAQ EXIT STRATEGY
CONGRESS AWARDS ITSELF CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR
NEW BIPARTISAN LAW WOULD MAKE DOG NECKERCHIEFS MANDATORY
HIDE THIS WARNING
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Follow That Onion Headline Quiz
Created Jul 16, 2012 in
Featured Aug 9, 2012
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Jul 16th, 2012 at 20:58 GMT
Area man confused by sporcle game.
Jul 16th, 2012 at 22:49 GMT
^^ "I always thought spork was spelled with a K," says man.
Jul 16th, 2012 at 23:22 GMT
This might not be the Onion, but it is about Sporcle: http://www.northwesternflipside.com/2010/11/10/obama-completes-every-quiz-on-sporcle-republicans-win-the-house/ Thanks for the quiz druhutch, I laughed a lot!
Jul 17th, 2012 at 00:47 GMT
That was pretty hilarious, chair.
Game published: Aug 9th, 2012 at 19:00 GMT
Aug 9th, 2012 at 19:17 GMT
Brilliant! I love the Onion!
Aug 9th, 2012 at 19:26 GMT
Passed on without comment, the most incredible story The Onion has ever run: http://web.archive.org/web/20010123230000/www.theonion.com/onion3701/bush_nightmare.html
Aug 9th, 2012 at 19:38 GMT
The Onion is my only news source.
Aug 9th, 2012 at 20:12 GMT
Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.
Aug 9th, 2012 at 20:13 GMT
There's a site called 'Literally Unbelievable' for screenshots of people on facebook who take Onion articles seriously and make fools of themselves.
Aug 9th, 2012 at 20:24 GMT
Aug 9th, 2012 at 20:53 GMT
@defineexistence: I had never seen that site before, and I will now spend the rest of the day on it.
Aug 9th, 2012 at 21:41 GMT
I like the URL.
Aug 9th, 2012 at 21:50 GMT
Fox, NBC, take note: This is how you report the news!
Aug 9th, 2012 at 22:14 GMT
@defineexistence My favorites from Literally Unbelievable are the OUTRAGED people in response to the Onion headline "Planned Parenthood to Open $8 Billion Abortionplex."
Aug 9th, 2012 at 22:56 GMT
Love it. If you do a sequel, maybe you could include personal favorite "Dolphins Evolve Opposable Thumbs."
Aug 10th, 2012 at 00:00 GMT
Please, sir, I want some more.
Aug 10th, 2012 at 00:40 GMT
I, too, got stuck on the literally unbelievable site for some time, laughing out loud. I particularly like the 85% of the citizens of the US do not know the dance steps to the National Anthem. Too funny.
Aug 11th, 2012 at 03:48 GMT
You won't thank me, I'm sure, for giving out the URL:
Aug 16th, 2012 at 02:46 GMT
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