|And don't ever let me catch you guys in America!|
|You're right, Ed. A parachute not opening—that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine, having your nuts bit off by a Laplander—that's the way I wanna go!|
|''...In the perilous night / For the ramparts we watched / uh, da-da-da-da-da-daaaa…''|
|-How could you do something so vicious?|
-It was easy my dear. You forget, I spent two years as a building contractor.
|-Hey! The missing evidence in the Kelner case! My God, he really was innocent!|
-He went to the chair two years ago, Frank.
|Hey Look! It's Enrico Pallazzo!|
|Well, when I see 5 weirdos dressed in togas stabbing a guy in the middle of the park in full view of 100 people, I shoot the bastards. That's my policy.|
|Look Ed, he's got a picture of your wife.|
|-You want to take a dinghy?|
-No, I took care of that at the press conference.
|All right, Stephanie, gently extend your arm. Extend your middle finger.|
|-Here, you can take this back.|
-Whose is that?
|Please disperse, nothing to see here…|
|Mrs. Nordberg, I think we can save your husband's arm. Where would you like it sent?|
|Just think; next time I shoot someone, I could be arrested.|
|-I can't see anything.|
-Use your open eye, Frank.
|Frank, they're not here for you. 'Weird Al' Yankovic is on the plane.|
|Why was the 'I Luv You' not listed in Ludwig's records? And if it was, did he know about it? And if he didn't, who did? And where the hell was I?|
|Everywhere I look, something reminds me of her…|
|-Same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl...girl dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.|
-No, the worst.
|I've got nine more.|
|Entering without a search warrant, destroying property, arson, sexual assault with a concrete dildo...?|
|Jane, since I've met you, I've noticed things that I never knew were there before...birds singing, dew glistening on a newly formed leaf, stoplights.|
-No, Dutch Irish. My father was from Wales.