| Quote | Movie | Genre/Year |
| When I was a little kid my mother told me not to stare into the sun. So once when I was six, I did. | |
| Spoof. Dope. Crank. Creep. Bomb. Spank. Bang. Zip. Tweak. Chard. Call it what you will. It's all methamphetamine. That's what I'm here for. | |
| Your role will remain classified, and Uncle Sam's official position is you're the scum of the earth. | |
| Distraction is an obstruction for the construction. | |
| How can a train be lost? It's on rails! | |
| I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to. | |
| Thousands of years ago the first man discovered how to make fire. He was probably burned at the stake he had taught his brothers to light. | |
| Good dags. D'ya like dags? | |
| They've done it! They've raised $50,000 for Frank's conveniently priced surgery! | |
| You know, thank God you jumped, because if you didn't, I was supposed to throw you off! | |