| Quote | Movie | Year |
| I have a drinking problem? **** you, Peck, you're a Mormon. Compared to you we ALL have a drinking problem! | |
| Show me all the blueprints. Show me all the blueprints. Show me all the blueprints. | |
| Carrie, I am making a birdhouse. | |
| It's not often you see a Mexican in a suit. | |
| You wanna be a big cop in a small town? **** off up the model village. | |
| It seems I've created a monster. A strangely persuasive monster. | |
| I feel old, but not very wise. | |
| I know how to finish the script now. It ends with Kaufman driving home after his lunch with Amelia, thinking he knows how to finish the script. | |
| MAPPING THE ****ING PIG GENOME! | |
| Well, everyone knows Custer died at Little Bighorn. What this book presupposes is... maybe he didn't. | |
| | Quote | Movie | Year |
| Nobel prize, Otto! Nobel prize. We'll see you in Sweden! | |
| I was born into the Hebrew persuasion, but when I got older I converted to narcissism. | |
| You have NOTHING, nothing to threaten me with! Nothing to do with all your strength! | |
| I like to look for things no one else catches. I hate the way drivers never look at the road in old American movies. | |
| There's a man... in back of this place. He's the one who's doing it. I can see him through the wall. I can see his face. I hope that I never see that face, ever, outside of a dream | |
| I'm someone you can trust. I'm a movie producer. | |
| This is my house! This is my child! And you are my guest! Now sit the hell down before I knock your ignorant ass into next week! | |
| It's just not cool to be a Nazi anymore, baby. | |
| Stupid ****ING idiot! Red-shirted ASS! You guys think you're so ****ing cool, it makes me sick! 'Oh, let's go make fun of the vegans, and their crazy lifestyle!' | |
| Woman, Feed me!! | |
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