If Tom Cruise was a...

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Can you name the If Tom Cruise was a...?

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If Tom Cruise...he'd be....
If he was from Israel, he'd be
If he was a boxer, he'd be
If he were a trickster, he'd be
If he was always asking for money, he'd be
If he played pool, he'd be
If he was a cobbler, he'd be
If he were unlucky, he'd be
If he was a heavy drinker, he'd be
If he were a detective, he'd be
If he inspired an artist, he'd be
If he were a reporter, he'd be
If he were infected, he'd be
If Tom Cruise...he'd be....
If he slept a lot, he'd be
If he liked flashy clothing, he'd be
If he were an overeater, he'd be
If he had diarrhea, he'd be
If he were into arts and crafts, he'd be
If he were Mr. T impersonator, he'd be
If he worked with animals, he'd be
If he managed a church, he'd be
If he worked in a soup kitchen, he'd be
If he were a lawyer, he'd be
If he sang sad songs, he'd be

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