If Tom Cruise was a...

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Can you name the If Tom Cruise was a...?

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If Tom Cruise...he'd be....
If he slept a lot, he'd be
If he sang sad songs, he'd be
If he were into arts and crafts, he'd be
If he was a cobbler, he'd be
If he was always asking for money, he'd be
If he were a detective, he'd be
If he was a boxer, he'd be
If he managed a church, he'd be
If he was from Israel, he'd be
If he inspired an artist, he'd be
If he were an overeater, he'd be
If he were unlucky, he'd be
If Tom Cruise...he'd be....
If he worked with animals, he'd be
If he worked in a soup kitchen, he'd be
If he were a lawyer, he'd be
If he played pool, he'd be
If he were Mr. T impersonator, he'd be
If he liked flashy clothing, he'd be
If he were a trickster, he'd be
If he were a reporter, he'd be
If he had diarrhea, he'd be
If he was a heavy drinker, he'd be
If he were infected, he'd be

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