The Roast of NL Fan Bases

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Can you name the NL teams based on the roast of their fan base?

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Where to begin? You're rude, annoying, you throw up on little kids, cheer for opponent injuries, and are the perfect definition of classless, btw 2 titles in 127 years is pathetic
Your fans are so lame, they actually wanted to copyright the re-naming of a month because of a freak playoff run. How did that end again by the way?
You worshipped a cheater and a fraud, and he won you nothing, good enough
You get excited to see a man go down a slide and a bunch of sausages run around.... that's a loss of man points
Your support is so bad that franchises have failed twice in your city. Third times a charm right? Wrong
The Black Sox, Carlton Fisk, no one remembers when you win, and your most famous player is a disgrace
Just think, a 13 year old Yankee fan has seen 5x the titles that your great, great grandfather has. You're so lame, you blame your troubles on a farm animal.
You think a game goes from the 3rd-7th, you call yourselves fans, you're not, good luck with that divorce
There are more fans of the movie Gigli than this team, like your state counterpart, you don't deserve an MLB franchise
Most of you aren't even from the city, you just call yourselves fans because they used to be on national TV, and the chop is not only offensive, but annoying
The most known aspect of your team is an annoying hill in centerfield, 40+ years of existance, 0 WS wins, Killer B's didn't exactly kill did they?
You worshipped a cheater and a fraud, and he won you nothing, and now he's a coach? Miller Lite is better.
Your team is so irrelevant, when asked to name a player, people still guess #19. Wait, you're in first?
Everyone loved your team when you beat the Yan, actually, can I see your papers first?
You'll always be #2, and the joke, of your city. Big payroll, zero results, trust me, no one wants to meet you
18 straight. wow, I don't even want to make fun of you, I just feel sorry for you

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