| Quote | Character |
| 'Are you looking for a CHALLEEENNGE????!!' | |
| 'Fluffy puff Marshmellows....maaaade from the best stuff!' | |
| 'Hey gals, let's go get ready to LOOK SO GOOD!!! | |
| 'Ready gals? This outfit...so good or no good?' | |
| 'I met a possum.' | |
| 'I have a crush on EVERY BOY!' | |
| 'Looks like I'm gunna have to jump....' | |
| 'Heart of a lion/And the wings of a bat/Because it's midnight!' (band) | |
| 'Ya'll biscuitheads!' | |
| 'Cheat commandos....Rock, rock on!' | |
| 'The Cheat Commandos will never find our desert headquarters, since we relocated to my nana's backyard!' | |
| 'Kids, don't play with too many knives!' | |
| 'Eh, Steve!' | |
| 'YOUR HEAD ASPLODE' | |
| 'I could be a good mission guy!' | |
| 'I don't exist!' | |
| 'I'll get you, Eh Steve!' | |
| *printing noise* | |
| 'Yeah, shut up, kids!' | |
| 'I'll give him what for!' | |
| *floats away sadly* | |
| Doesn't speak, but one of the finest soldiers Homestar has ever met | |
| *dances to keyboard riff* | |
| 'Stiny! Get me a Danish!' | |
| 'I am a vampire and....' | |
| 'Sever your leg, please. Sever your leg.' | |