| FML status | Book or play |
| My mother is sleeping with my uncle and my dad's haunting me at night. FML | |
| The man I love has a crazy wife that lives in the attic and tries to kill him. FML. | |
| My friend convinced my daughter to kill her pet duck to prove she loved me. She killed herself. FML | |
| I sold my soul to the devil in exchange for magical powers. Now he's back to collect. FML | |
| Learning the joys of reading. My job is to set books on fire. FML. | |
| Mother died today. I don't give a damn about life. Killed a man. Don't know why. Now in jail about to be hanged. FML. | |
| I fell in love with a goat, My wife is pissed. FML | |
| Upset Poseidon. Now I can't go home. But I get to be fed grapes by a hot chick. FML? | |
| Things are crumby and people are so phony. FML. | |
| I fell in love with an Oriental girl--who was actually a guy. FML | |
| My husband killed our imaginary child--and we had guests over. FML. | |
| Brought a friend over, He pissed off my uncle by sleeping with my dad's peasant girlfriend. They had a duel. FML. | |