Ron Burgundy or Charlie Sheen?

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Can you name the speaker? Ron Burgundy or Charlie Sheen?

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QuoteWho Said It?
'I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.'
'I have no interest in [the public's] retarded opinions. I'm gonna win inside every moment, and they can just find the most comfortable chair in their small house and sit back and
'I'm not Thomas Jefferson. He was a pussy.'
'There's a new sheriff in town. And he has an army of assassins.'
'I'm gonna punch you in the ovary. That's what I'm gonna do. A straight shot. Right to the babymaker.'
'I look good. I mean really good. Hey everyone! Come see how good I look!'
'I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time, and this includes naps, I'm an F-18...'
'You can't process me with a normal brain.'
'I'm the man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and braun.'
'I'm in a glass case of emotion!'
'[I have] tiger blood and Adonis DNA.'
'If you try [my drug] you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.'
'I am battle-tested bayonets!'
'Let's go over the ground rules. Rule number one: No touching of the hair or face. And THAT'S IT!'
QuoteWho Said It?
'You are a smelly pirate hooker!'
'I'm tired of pretending I'm not a total bitchin' rock star from Mars.'
'I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels, especially if he winds up in my octagon.'
'I can barely lift my right arm because I did so many. I don't know if you heard me counting. I did over a thousand.'
'If you want to throw down in fisticuffs, fine. I've got Jack Johnson and Tom O'Leary waiting for ya. Right here.'
'Vatican assassin warlocks!'
'I'm expressing my anguish through the majesty of song!'
'Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words. Imagine what I could have done with my fire-breathing fists.'
'I have a disease? Bullshit. I cured it with my brain.'
'I am a werewolf stampede. I will stomp on your infant minds with my righteous fuzzy toes.'
'I'm going to hang out with these two smokin' hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here but I sure like the view.'
'My life is perfect and winning every second, and I'm delivering the goods at every frickin' turn.'
'We will dance till the sun rises. And then our children will form a family band and tour the countryside. And you won't be invited!'
'[Normal people] lay down with their ugly wives and their ugly children and just look at their loser lives and then they look at me and say, I can't process it.'

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