League of Legends Champions by Joke [January 2014]

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Can you name the League of Legends Champions by Joke [May 2013]?

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JokeChampion
Noxuuu... oh, woah, oof! How does he do it?
Weather forecast for tonight: dark, with a chance of pain!
Feel free to give up now.
Blindness is no impairment against a smelly enemy.
I cannot use your skull. You have a misshapen head.
Is that a rocket in your pocket?
Two birds with one stone... Have you met my parents?
Lying is, like, ninety five percent of what I do.
Hmm, I suppose you're expecting some unbearable pun.
The worth of a man can be measured by the length of his beard, and the girth of his belt buckle.
I like my weapons how I like my music... heavy and metal!
If PETA asks, this fur is fake.
Imagine if I had a real weapon!
Let's be friends forever.
Sounds a 'Charge!' bugle call.
*Burps* I think a voidling just came out!
Are... You sure you're not in the wrong league?
If you'd like to play with me, you'd better be sure you know the game.
They come apart so easily. How do you put them back together again?
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like banana.
Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium 'the medical elements'? Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'!
Yes, it's true. For only $2.95 a minute, I will leave you breathless.
Nature is the truest form of balance. Eat and avoid being eaten.
Is it cold in here, or is it just me?
This is my happy face. See?
No jokes for Mr. Okay. :(
Fishbones, you know what we oughta' do? 'Do the laundry, wash dishes and pay some bills.' Stupid dumb rocket launcher
I tried to silence my mother once. Boy, did I regret that.
Nobody understands me, they called my work a hack job!
Mundo say his own name a lot, or else he forget! Has happened before.
Wanna know why me Roger is so Jolly? Heheheh..
Speak softly...and ride a big yeti!
My profession...! You know, now that I think of it, I've always wanted to be a baker.
Suffering is magic.
The only time I have a drinking problem is when I spill it!
No matter how far it is to the top, it's still within my grasp!
When you dance with death, lead.
My right arm is a lot stronger than my left arm!
Laying an egg isn't as easy as it looks.
JokeChampion
I got these tattoos in rune prison!
What's black and blue and is about to show you the definition of pain?!
Hand bone connected to the axe bone connected to your face bone!
Who... let the dogs... out. Woof. Woof, woof.
Go ahead, be negative. You'll be just my type.
I knew I should have sprung for the blade warranty.
Size doesn't mean everything.
Power laning, power farming, power ganking, power kills! So many kills! Four-hundred kills!
Our seasons are reversed: my spring, your fall.
All the better to eat you with my dear!
A sniper's greatest tool is precision... and good equipment.
So many noobs... will matchmaking ever find true balance?
Can you smell coward, Bristle? Get 'em!
And they say I can't handle my drink...
Is it hot in here or is it just me?!
Never lost a fair game... or played one.
Inflates himself into a balloon doing a couple of bounces before returning to normal
No, really, put that apple on your head...
I put the 'go' in 'golem'. That was humor. Other golems find that to be appropriately funny.
Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom!
Cut purse? No. Cut throat? Yes.
Oh no! I seem to have stepped on one of my cousins!
Jokes? I don't know any jokes.
Sometimes you're the catch. Sometimes you're the bait.
Come on! Does this look dangerous to you?
Gems? Gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.
I think I broke a nail, good thing it wasn't mine.
Shaken, not stirred.
If light travels so fast, how come it's never caught a ninja?
Did I mention it's mating season?
I could go for a twirl... Whoa, whoa whoa ah, wooh!'
For my next trick, I'll make you disappear!
Light mage? I'm just an ordinary mage.
Screaming won't do you any good, but it's music to my ears.
You can't beat me, so join me. I need a good pair of legs.
If we approach strategically from the flank... Oh who am I kidding, let's just morph and eat them.
Yes, they make shurikens this small!
Ugh, I lost another blade. I wonder who it's in this time.
No, I'm not happy to see you. Yes, that is a horn growing out of my head.
JokeChampion
Caught between a rock... and a hard place.
I ate an optimist once, but I couldn't keep him down.
If you run, you won't see me stab you!
What? Do I have someone in my teeth?
I think I might know a relative of yours. No hair... sagging flesh... always going on about brains. Ring any bells?
Everyone's a hero... till you shoot off a leg or two.
You can't milk those.
Plays different electric guitar sounds.
Lima Oscar Lima!
Turbo on! Uh...wuuh? Just needs a little kick start there. Hyup.
Listen close-...I have important-...This is why I can't take you nice places!
Hmm, something's fishy.
My blade is not only precise, but totally gnarly.
Let me help shuffle off your mortal coil.
Why can't I get a straight answer? It's always just 'Oh no! Stop hitting me! Ow, my face!'
Noxians... I hate those guys...
Who's there? Garen who? Yeah, I guess he does say that a lot.
Joke? What do you mean?
What do you get when a dragon sneezes? Out of the way.
Find me an immovable object, and I'll put this question to rest!
So much bloodshed... This is my kind of place!
I hear a man likes a lady with legs.
How do you like my guns... Shock, and Awe!
You smell like burning!
Wuju.. pass me that potion?
Sometimes I think this anchor just weighs me down.
I may be bad, but I feel good...
Knock, knock. Who's there? The moon... it's far away. You were alone the whole time.
Oh, what's that smell? Oh, it's me...
Forbidden shadow wins.
Not all angels are good.
And they said I lacked balance. Ha!
You know what they say... karma always catches up to you.
Not Draven; Draaaaven.
It's alright Clubbems, we'll get to smashing soon.
Let's end this quickly... (Cough) I need to use the little soldier's room.
I haven't got a brain, and soon... neither will you!
Talent, honor, discipline, and pretty pictures!
Sunder any army, crumble any mountain, leap the great - owwawww... oh, my toesies.

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