League of Legends Champions by Joke [January 2014]

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Can you name the League of Legends Champions by Joke [May 2013]?

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JokeChampion
I like my weapons how I like my music... heavy and metal!
Sometimes you're the catch. Sometimes you're the bait.
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like banana.
Why can't I get a straight answer? It's always just 'Oh no! Stop hitting me! Ow, my face!'
And they said I lacked balance. Ha!
Come on! Does this look dangerous to you?
Blindness is no impairment against a smelly enemy.
Go ahead, be negative. You'll be just my type.
How do you like my guns... Shock, and Awe!
If we approach strategically from the flank... Oh who am I kidding, let's just morph and eat them.
Yes, they make shurikens this small!
Jokes? I don't know any jokes.
They come apart so easily. How do you put them back together again?
Laying an egg isn't as easy as it looks.
My right arm is a lot stronger than my left arm!
Wuju.. pass me that potion?
I could go for a twirl... Whoa, whoa whoa ah, wooh!'
All the better to eat you with my dear!
I may be bad, but I feel good...
Not all angels are good.
Talent, honor, discipline, and pretty pictures!
Let me help shuffle off your mortal coil.
I got these tattoos in rune prison!
You can't beat me, so join me. I need a good pair of legs.
Who... let the dogs... out. Woof. Woof, woof.
Nobody understands me, they called my work a hack job!
If light travels so fast, how come it's never caught a ninja?
Did I mention it's mating season?
Can you smell coward, Bristle? Get 'em!
Inflates himself into a balloon doing a couple of bounces before returning to normal
No, really, put that apple on your head...
Is that a rocket in your pocket?
Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom!
I ate an optimist once, but I couldn't keep him down.
It's alright Clubbems, we'll get to smashing soon.
If you run, you won't see me stab you!
Is it hot in here or is it just me?!
When you dance with death, lead.
Size doesn't mean everything.
JokeChampion
If PETA asks, this fur is fake.
Forbidden shadow wins.
Shaken, not stirred.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark, with a chance of pain!
Not Draven; Draaaaven.
A sniper's greatest tool is precision... and good equipment.
Listen close-...I have important-...This is why I can't take you nice places!
Speak softly...and ride a big yeti!
Yes, it's true. For only $2.95 a minute, I will leave you breathless.
Feel free to give up now.
I knew I should have sprung for the blade warranty.
Turbo on! Uh...wuuh? Just needs a little kick start there. Hyup.
No matter how far it is to the top, it's still within my grasp!
What do you get when a dragon sneezes? Out of the way.
Cut purse? No. Cut throat? Yes.
Never lost a fair game... or played one.
I think I might know a relative of yours. No hair... sagging flesh... always going on about brains. Ring any bells?
Is it cold in here, or is it just me?
And they say I can't handle my drink...
*Burps* I think a voidling just came out!
Plays different electric guitar sounds.
Light mage? I'm just an ordinary mage.
Lying is, like, ninety five percent of what I do.
Everyone's a hero... till you shoot off a leg or two.
Sometimes I think this anchor just weighs me down.
Our seasons are reversed: my spring, your fall.
I put the 'go' in 'golem'. That was humor. Other golems find that to be appropriately funny.
I cannot use your skull. You have a misshapen head.
Ugh, I lost another blade. I wonder who it's in this time.
Wanna know why me Roger is so Jolly? Heheheh..
I hear a man likes a lady with legs.
I haven't got a brain, and soon... neither will you!
No jokes for Mr. Okay. :(
Let's end this quickly... (Cough) I need to use the little soldier's room.
So many noobs... will matchmaking ever find true balance?
You can't milk those.
Are... You sure you're not in the wrong league?
Joke? What do you mean?
Two birds with one stone... Have you met my parents?
JokeChampion
I think I broke a nail, good thing it wasn't mine.
Let's be friends forever.
Find me an immovable object, and I'll put this question to rest!
Caught between a rock... and a hard place.
Hmm, something's fishy.
Who's there? Garen who? Yeah, I guess he does say that a lot.
This is my happy face. See?
Lima Oscar Lima!
Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium 'the medical elements'? Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'!
If you'd like to play with me, you'd better be sure you know the game.
Imagine if I had a real weapon!
Mundo say his own name a lot, or else he forget! Has happened before.
Sunder any army, crumble any mountain, leap the great - owwawww... oh, my toesies.
Hand bone connected to the axe bone connected to your face bone!
Sounds a 'Charge!' bugle call.
My blade is not only precise, but totally gnarly.
Fishbones, you know what we oughta' do? 'Do the laundry, wash dishes and pay some bills.' Stupid dumb rocket launcher
What? Do I have someone in my teeth?
So much bloodshed... This is my kind of place!
Suffering is magic.
Noxians... I hate those guys...
Power laning, power farming, power ganking, power kills! So many kills! Four-hundred kills!
Screaming won't do you any good, but it's music to my ears.
The only time I have a drinking problem is when I spill it!
Oh, what's that smell? Oh, it's me...
Oh no! I seem to have stepped on one of my cousins!
You know what they say... karma always catches up to you.
For my next trick, I'll make you disappear!
What's black and blue and is about to show you the definition of pain?!
My profession...! You know, now that I think of it, I've always wanted to be a baker.
I tried to silence my mother once. Boy, did I regret that.
Hmm, I suppose you're expecting some unbearable pun.
No, I'm not happy to see you. Yes, that is a horn growing out of my head.
Noxuuu... oh, woah, oof! How does he do it?
You smell like burning!
Knock, knock. Who's there? The moon... it's far away. You were alone the whole time.
Nature is the truest form of balance. Eat and avoid being eaten.
The worth of a man can be measured by the length of his beard, and the girth of his belt buckle.
Gems? Gems are truly outrageous. They are truly, truly, truly outrageous.

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