| Quote | Character |
| 'Some people wrestle with their inner demons. I stabbed mine in the back of the head. He was a bleeder.' | |
| 'How many swords could a swordchuck chuck if a swordchuck could chuck swords?' | |
| 'Oh, I steal souls and secrets.' | |
| 'Clearly, I lack arrogance as that would be a flaw.' | |
| 'How does the world owe us for doing the right thing?' | |
| 'So excuse me if we have trouble navigating through the abnormal psychology imbued within these walls.' | |
| 'He is locked in perpetual orbit around a point about three seconds to the left of the future.' | |
| 'What about our pet shelter?' | |
| 'I can't afford real oranges, so they been eatin' Cheetos for three, maybe four months now. Yar.' | |
| 'Great Lord of Spiders, can't we have one meeting without snacks?' | |
| 'Mom! How many times must I ask you to refer to me by my dark name of the damned?' | |
| 'You're all just waiting for me to say 'boned,' aren't you?' | |
| 'Did someone say anything remotely related to fire?!' | |
| 'Let's get some doom up ins.' | |
| 'On the bright side, I'm going to kill you and then it won't matter.' | |
| 'All I was going to do as ruler was plunge Elfland into a modern dark age anyway.' | |
| 'You're not running against anyone, we have NO system for voting, and kings aren't elected anyway!' | |
| 'So now I can do crazy stuff like drill for mana in endangered species forest. Weeeee!' | |
| | Quote | Character |
| 'Wanna play a card game?' | |
| 'You can't avatar full-time. There's just no money in it. Except for ol' Dollarsly. That guys' rolling in it.' | |
| 'My true voice would make your brain eat itself.' | |
| 'What if this iteration of me is the illusion, but the real me is still real?' | |
| 'I invented chicancery. You don't want to play this game with me, elf.' | |
| 'Good morrow and well met, fellow adventurers all!' | |
| 'Crap! Piss! Kill!' | |
| 'Well, would you look at that, another beautiful miracle. If it weren't for my atheism, I'd be impressed by it.' | |
| 'I know a guy...' | |
| 'What? Can't a blind witch make stew out of a long extinct rodent tail for her immortal reptile boyfriend?' | |
| 'Drozzle, drazzle, druzzle, drass, time for you guys to change class!' | |
| 'Well, okay, but let's not overlook the tragic suffering of those among us who are now missing a spear.' | |
| 'I will simply use my human laser to kill myself so I don't self-destruct.' | |
| 'Guess I ran out of parents.' | |
| 'Suckers!' | |
| 'He spoke and I kicked him. I thought that as our 'thing.' Did I do wrong?' | |
| 'Sulk brought Cure albums back.' | |
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