Luther: [answering phone] Hello, Memo Paris. Chloe: What? Who's that? Luther: Kim Basinger's character in The Natural. Remember? The succubus who almost destroyed Robert Redford's baseball career.
Stephanie: You're not as interesting as you think you are. Chloe: Well, you're not as skinny as you think you are. Stephanie: Shouldn't you be dancing in a glass booth somewhere?
Chloe: Hi there, I'm Chloe. I live in apartment 23. How old are you? 16? 17? Anthony: 17 and a half.
Chloe: It was wrong of me to become friends with Fox. Turns out her cousin's not in Blink-182.
June: I've always wanted to go to a real-life Hamptons lighthouse. Rainy weather. In a fisherman's sweater. On a bike. With a sandwich and my thoughts. Chloe: I almost just hit you.
James: Why do you hate Yolanda? Luther: I do not hate Yolanda! It's just...
June: You've seen Trey as he is and you're okay with that? Chloe: Well, I Googled him and found out he's worth $3.2 billion.
Scott: Honey, you know you're pretty. You got it all going on. But sometimes guests, like my boss, can misconstrue when you sit on their lap and feed them ambrosia salad with your fingers. June: You put your fingers inside of your dad's boss' mouth?
June: [reading from the graphic novel that is based on Chloe] 'Patrick Kelly.' That's the guy who wrote these. Do you know who that is? Chloe: Ugh.
Luther: Bitch, please. Bitch. Chloe: Ugh. Why not? Luther: Because in the past four years, you've borrowed... over $20,000 from James. Dinners, shopping sprees.
Chloe: [answering phone] Hello? Steven: Chloe, it's Steven. [Chloe looks confused] Steven: June's ex-fiance. [Chloe looks confused] Steven: You and I had sex on her birthday cake. [Chloe looks confused] Steven: It was chocolate.
Chloe: I guess I got a lot going on underneath the surface.
Chloe: You see these? Tears of joy.
James: You can't have two inspiring first-day-of-production speeches. The SOB usurped me!
Chloe: How many times have you had sex with him? June: Zero, we've only been on one date. [Chloe kneels and tries to spread June's legs apart] June: What are you doing?
June: I have very tough criteria! James: He can't be from your work or your gym, or live in your building.
Chloe: Those girls are exactly the reason why I don't hang out with girls. They're competitive, they backstab, and they post group pictures of themselves on Facebook so they can show the world what they look like in a bikini.
James: My publicist thought I should take advantage of all the press I'm getting for Dancing with the Stars and launch my own line of jeans. So... Beek Jeans.
June: Aw, yeah! Booty text! Chloe: Get out of here, you little ****! I love you! I got you something. It's a casual sex kit.
June: I can't do this whole casual sex thing. I tried. But I get too attached. I can't be like you.
[Chloe shows June a copy of People magazine featuring James on the cover as 'Sexiest Man Alive'] Chloe: I had them mock this up down at the office.
Chloe: You look like you just got back from the Douchie Awards and you won five Douchies.
Chloe: June, if you're not being completely honest with your friends, then you're not helping them be the best that they can possibly be. By the way, you're using the wrong foundation for your skin tone, it actually clashes with your skin tone.
Chloe: I'm having an affair with Teddy. Benjamin and June: What? Chloe: June, I'm really sorry you had to find out this way.
June: You guys seem so happy together, and you could tell that he really... he really likes you. Chloe: Really? Do you think so? June: Oh, absolutely. This is my area of expertise. Chloe: Great! So it'll hurt that much more when I totally destroy him!
June: You won, Chloe. You kept pushing me and pushing me to be more fun and spontaneous like you, and I cracked. I cracked two fried eggs on the GMA window. Chloe: What? June: Two fried eggs—when you push your boobs up against the glass.
June: You missed me? Chloe: No, I don't miss you. I... miss you reacting to me. I mean, if I can't come home from a crazy night and shock you with my stories, what am I even doing it for?